Title: Big, Long, Babbling Confessions (1/1)
Author: Queena
E-mail: thessulah@aol.com
Rating: PG
Summary: Oz and Buffy have a break-through conversation.
Feedback: Pwetty pwease?
Disclaimer: The characters used in this fic aren't mine. They're Joss
Whedon's.
Author's Note: This is the next installment of the "Blood Pump" series.
Other Note: In the first part of the series, I had Buffy and Oz living in LA,
but I slipped up and had them in Sunnydale again in one of the other
installments. Just in case there's any confusion, they *are* living in LA.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
He's so lucky that I don't hold a grudge. I mean, most guys who had the nerve
to stand me up and then ask me to meet them alone in a dark park at midnight
would get the hand. He's just so lucky.
And, I mean, why a dark park? I mean, what if he gets attacked before he
meets me? I mean, I just might not save him if a vampire attacks him. I could
be a bitch like that. Psshh, who am I kidding? I wouldn't do that. It's not
like I can ignore my calling just because a guy stood me up.
Okay, so he didn't *exactly* stand me up. He did say he would be there and
didn't show up. I guess that's not really standing me up. I just didn't
expect it to hurt so much. When he didn't show, I thought it was a personal
snubbing. I just didn't think he'd say he would be there, but not show. Maybe
it was seeing Willow again. Maybe it's put an end to our barely existent
relationship. Sigh. I just don't know.
Okay, I'm nearing the bench he said he'd meet me at. If he's not there
waiting for me, I'm going home. *I* am not waiting for him.
YES! He's there. Wait, no. I am not happy to see him. I'm still upset with
him. Even if he does look so cute. With his hair all spikey and perfectly
mussed. And his bowling shirt. Whimper. I can't believe I still like him.
"Buffy." Awwww, he's sounds so sweet and quiet. Even stood up when he saw me.
NO. Will not fixate on how polite and cute he is! I will not.
"Hey." Just keep cool. Don't let him know how much you've missed him. And
whatever you do, don't bring up Willow until he does.
"Will you sit down?" Mmmm, okay. But I'll stay on my side, and you stay on
your side. And please don't touch me. I might melt.
"Sorry, I didn't show up on Monday. I had something really important to do."
Yeah, doing what? Mooning over Willow? Cuz if that's the reason I don't want
to hear it.
"Mmm."
"You're mad at me." Very observant of you. And stop with the puppy dog eyes.
Nothing you say is going to make me not mad at you anymore. At least, nothing
that's not really heart-felt.
"I am not."
"You are. And you have a right to be. I bailed on you and I shouldn't have
done that." God, this is so infuriating. If he still has these feelings for
Willow how the hell am I ever going to have a chance. He has to tell me.
"Oz, why did you break up with Willow?" Okay, now where did that come from?
Not that I don't want to know, but that look on his face is heart breaking.
Have I completely lost my sense of tact?
Oh, great. Now we have that long uncomfortable moment of silence as he tries
to think of the best way to explain and I wait, eagerly holding my breath. I
hope he hurries 'cause oxygen is really good for my brain. And I really don't
want my face to turn blue.
"I can't believe you haven't guessed by now." Long pause. "I broke up with
her because I couldn't stand watching her love someone else and pretend to be
loving me. I couldn't stand what I did to her and Xander's friendship.
And...this is the funny thing...I couldn't stand seeing the tortured look on
Xander's face every time I got to hold her hand or kiss her or just sit next
to her."
"But she chose you, Oz. You gave her the choice and then you took it away
from her. What if she really did want you? You didn't see how heart-broken
she was after you two split."
I'll never forget that. Seeing her tear-streaked face, watching her mope as I
tried to cheer her up. I never thought she'd pull through it. And here I am,
trying to get the man she cried her heart out over. I'm a bad, evil, wicked
best friend and I deserve to be shot. Esspecially since I'm sitting here
wishing he would touch me, kiss me, assure me that it's me he wants and not
her. No wonder she hates me.
"No, Willow is the type of girl who will always want what she can't have.
Right now that's me. Because I'm trying to move on. Because she saw me with
you." He's right about that. Willow is kind of....selfish sometimes.
I don't have anything to say about that, but he looks like he's waiting for
me to respond. Or he's just waiting for a moment before continueing. I don't
know.
"You know what really scares me?" Vampires? Demons? All the nasties that go
bump in the night? Me? "Falling for you as hard as I fell her and having to
watch you wish you were with Angel."
Oh my God. Does he really think that? Can't he tell how much I like him?
"Oz, are you blind or something?" He looks really confused. Maybe I should
clarify myself. God, deep breath. I'm going to tell him. To say it out loud
how I really feel about him. "I can't have Angel. I know that. And it's taken
a really long time to get over that. But the only thing that has allowed me
to do so is you. Now, when I go to bed the last thing I think about is you. I
spend half of my day wondering when you'll wake up and notice how much I want
you. A...and...God this is really difficult." Shit, I can't breathe. Say
something. Anything. Please.
"I agonize all the time, hoping you'll finally get over Willow. And I scold
myself constantly for falling for my best friend's ex." God, if he doesn't
say something soon I'm just gonna keep babbling on and embarrassing myself
even more.
Oh. Oh. When did he get so close to me? Sigh, his hand feels so good against
mine. But what does this mean? Does it mean he feels the same way or what?
Oh. Oh. Oh. What is he do....Mmmm. His lips feels so nice. So soft and almost
teasing. His tongue, so warm against my lips, then my own tongue. He
tastes...like Oz. Like Winterfresh gum. His hands in my hair, his quick
breathing, his fast-paced heartbeat, all assaulting my senses. My heart is
going to beat it's way out of my chest any moment now.
With him pulling away, my mouth feels dry and empty. Is he going to tell me
something or just keep stareing at me? "Buffy, I--"
What was that? I heard yelling. "Bastardo!" See, there it is again. Great
interuption for our very touching moment. Mmmm, touching. No! Stop, Buffy!
Must pay attention to the sounds of the scuffle.
Is he following me? Great, I just hope he stays out of the way. I don't want
him to get hurt. Of course, if he'd stayed at the bench he could have gotten
hurt too. Hmm, this is very interesting. Could this be our mystery woman.
Well, five vamps against one non-Slayer girl doesn't seem fair at all. Better
jump in.
Kick, jab, roll. Damn vamps just get more fit. Ouch! Bastard! Crack! There,
take that! Stake. Dust. Next. Right, left, roundhouse. Stake. Dust. "Buffy!"
Oz? Oh, shit. Ow, let me go, I gotta get to Oz. Oh, yes! Go, homegirl! That
was a pretty nice move. That's the second time she's saved him, I owe her
one. Back headbutt. I can't believe you didn't see that coming. Idiot. Stake.
Dust. Done. What no more vampys. Aw, and I was just getting warmed up. Well,
better see if Oz is okay.
He's seems to be all right. Now time to question our new friend here. She
looks basically how Oz described her, but YIKES! that's a narly scar. Wonder
how she got that beauty. Ow, all the way from left temple to jaw, must have
hurt. "So, you wanna tell me who you are?"
"No." Well, that's rude.
"Look, when some chick is wandering around killing vampires, I like to know
them. You got a name?"
"I don't give my name to people I don't know." Wow, pretty thick accent she's
got there. I wonder what that is. And what the hell is she looking for? Oh!
Damn, that's a pretty wicked knife. Is that wooden? Ooo, and it's got a nifty
arm sheath. Now, why can't Giles get me weapons like that?
"Listen, I'd like to know why you're out here fighting evil."
"Mi dovere andare." What? Wait, where's she going?
"Hey! Come back here!" Aw, forget it. Maybe Oz know's what was up with her.
And why's he stareing after her? Grrrr.
"Italian."
"What'd she say?"
"How am I supposed to know?"
"Sor-ry. From the way you were talking it sounded like you might know some
Italian."
"Nope, but I've seen all of the "Godfather" movies." Hee, he's so cute. "Come
on, I'll walk you home." Mmmm, maybe I'll get a good-bye kiss.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I don't know Italian. I'm just pretending. I know what the words mean, but I
don't know if I wrote them right, so if someone knows Italian, please be kind
and let me know if this makes sense.