Quotable quotes

Let Your Eyes  Change Lives Pledge your eyes

Your chance of winning the lottery is the same whether you play it or not. - Fran Leibowitz

Liberty doesn't work as well in practice as it does in speeches. - Will Rogers

Baseball has the great advantage over cricket of being sooner ended. - George Bernard Shaw

The believer is happy; the doubter is wise. - Hungarian proverb

I don't think pornography is harmful, but it is terribly, terribly boring. - Noel Coward

The best thing about quitting smoking is starting again. - Mark Twain

I never vote for anyone. I always vote against. - W.C. Fields

Only the winners decide what were war crimes. - Gary Wills

On one issue, at least, men and women agree: they both distrust women. - H.L. Mencken

Women should be obscene and not heard. - Groucho Marx

I do not like work even when someone else does it. - Mark Twain

Maybe this world is another planet's hell. - Aldous Huxley

For certain people, after fifty, litigation takes the place of sex. - Gore Vidal

Man is a dog's ideal of what God should be. - Holbrook Jackson

Puritanism is the haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy. - H.L. Mencken

Democracy is the worship of jackals by jackasses. - H.L. Mencken

Keep a diary and one day it'll keep you. - Mae West

Anybody who hates dogs and loves whiskey can't be all bad. - W.C. Fields

Faith may be defined briefly as an illogical belief in the occurrence of the improbable. - H.L. Menckenaa

There are scores of thousands of human insects who are ready at a moment's notice to reveal the Will of God on every possible subject. - George Bernard Shaw

God seems to have an inordinate fondness for beetles. - J.B.S. Haldane

If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job. - Woody Allen

Freedom of the press is limited to those who own one. - A.J. Liebling

Many a man has chosen a woman in light so dim he wouldn't have chosen a suit by it. - Maurice Chevalier

Psychoanalysis is confession without absolution. - G.K. Chesterton

Every revolution evaporates and leaves only the slime of a new bureaucracy. - Franz Kafka

Show me a man who has enjoyed his school days and I'll show you a bully and a bore. - Robert Morley

Advertising may be described as the science of arresting human intelligence long enough to get money from it. - Stephen Leacock

An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do. - Dylan Thomas

To die for an idea is to set a rather high price on conjecture. - Anatole France