chthirteen

They finished the rest of their dinner uneventfully and Greta reluctantly left after catching sight of the dessert tray. They drove home in silence, hand in hand, both thinking. Eric was contemplating how he was going to tell Greta what he needed to tell her and Greta was worrying about Eric and what he had to tell her. Needless to say, both were a little nervous when they finally reached the cabin. Eric got out and opened up her car door, helping her down. He smiled up at her.
"Did I tell you tonight how amazing you look?" he asked.
"Yes, I think you did" she said, with a smile. "But it's ok, feel free" They walked up to the porch and Eric stopped to look around.
"It's so beautiful out tonight" he said, motioning to the clear night full of stars. Greta looked too and he wrapped his arms around her, drawing her closer.
"Eric" she said, quietly. "I know you said you had something you needed to tell me tonight. But I just wanted to tell you that maybe we shouldn't because..."
"No, Greta" he interrupted. "We need to talk about it" He let go of her and threw himself back on the porch swing, holding his hand to his head. Greta saw his pained expression and panicked a little but still sat down next to him.
"Whatever it is, I'm sure we can work through it" she said, placing her hand on his thigh.
"God, I hope so" he said, looking at her with eyes full of desperation. He took a deep breath. "Whatever I have to say now-please just let me say it all before you interrupt"
"Ok" she said, worried. "Go ahead"
"Greta, you know that Nicole and I have...history, I guess you could say" he started. "You know that she and I dated and that I was going to propose to her. Of course, Lucas stepped in and ruined that. But we had a very serious relationship during that time. And so naturally, we were intimate with each other...it was my first time and I honestly thought I was in love. I thought we were going to be together forever and I didn't think anyone could make me any happier. And I knew that she was more experienced than I was but I never really thought about it. God, I was so naive!" She saw him getting upset so she took his hand and squeezed it gently, urging him to continue.
"But things didn't work out between us, thanfully" he continued. "And then I met you and things started working out. Things were going so well and I was so happy, happier than I ever thought I could be after Nicole. I knew that Nicole still had feelings for me but I didn't care-honestly. You were all I needed or wanted. But Nicole had always had a past that I didn't know about-no one did. She was very secretive about it and didn't let anyone know about her family or where she came from. I had caught her in lies before but I was blind, I just let them go. Well, I found her secret-her big one. And when I found out-well, I was furious. I couldn't believe that she would do something like that. And the more I thought about it, the angrier I got. I realized that her decision years ago had affected not only her but also me. And it could have affected you too" He paused, staring out at the sky.
"Eric" she said, now really concerned. "Please, tell me what it is" He turned and looked at her in her eyes but his gaze was distant, as if he was looking through her.
"Greta, Nicole..." he started, and then stopped. "God, I can't even say it to you, you're so sweet and innocent" he said, stroking her cheek lightly.
"Eric, please, just say it" she said.
"When Nicole was younger, in order to make ends meet, she..." he said. "Nicole took part in a pornographic movie" It took a few minutes for the shock to run over Greta's face.
"What?" she asked. He shrugged sadly.
"She was in a porno" he said. "I ran across it by accident and confronted her on it. So naturally, when she had that big drama over her health, I panicked..."
"Wait, are you telling me that Nicole is sick because of the movie?" Greta asked.
"We thought so for awhile" he said. "But it turned out she was ok. But it still left the chance that I could have contracted something from her"
"And Eric, we almost..." she said, tears of horror filling her eyes and threating to run over. "Eric, we almost"
"Made love" he finished. "I know. That's why I have such anger toward her. She knew that she was putting me in danger when she allowed us to have sex. And she didn't tell me. She betrayed me, Greta, she put my health on risk for her own pleasure". Greta stared at him, still trying to understand exactly what he had just told her. "Greta, please say something" he begged. "Please" She quickly brushed her tears away.
"Eric, I don't know what..." she said, throwing up her hands. "I don't know what to say" He stared at her hard, tears also in his eyes.
"I can't believe this" he said. "Why did I ever think you would understand?"
"Eric, wait, I'm trying" she said. "This is just a big shock to me."
"No, I understand completely" he said, standing up and turning away from her. "I shouldn't have told you because I don't deserve your forgiveness...or you for that matter" He rushed in the door, leaving her in the same place on the porch swing. She wrapped her arms around herself and cried softly, unsure of how her future with Eric now stood.