LADIES' SYNDROME Though the title sounds like a health topic I can assure you it has nothing to do with it. I am sure menfolk will enjoy this column much more than the women who though with a slight reluctance has to ultimately agree to my view point. This team does have weaknesses. Rahul Dravid's display behind the stumps was pathetic, and we can't risk something like that happening against a world-class team. The best solution is to replace Mongia with a wicket-keeper, and send someone (perhaps Harbhajan?) to pinch-hit at No.3 if a wicket falls in the first 15 overs. The bowling is not completely convincing either, but there aren't many options Day in and day out when she has to go out for work, for an outing, for a party or even for a very ordinary occasion or for no reason if she has to visit casually her friend or even her mother's place nearby or even if it is for a funeral function, a lady goes through this 'syndrome'. 'Hurry up! It is getting late for the show. I don't know why you should take so much time to dress up? You look the same any way' kidded Vimala's husband. ' As if you look any better. Yesterday did you listen to Esther teasing you in the party or did you conveniently shut your ears for that Or perhaps old age is telling on you. Don't worry I'll get you a good Hearing Aid for your Birthday!' She teased her husband back. 'Truly I don't know why you ladies take so much time to get ready. I don't see much exception either. Even my sisters are the same in this. They are no better.' Said he seeing her in the old dress itself. Vimala was frantically searching in her cupboard as to what to wear. She took out one pink coloured saree. It has little too much of 'Zaree'. It would be too grand. But the blue looked too dull for the occasion. Brown looked old and last time she was in yellow churidar for the get together. Same gathering may be there and it would be too much to repeat her dress so soon. White may not be possible as she was planning to help out her friend also her two-year old son had to be carried some times. She was having real trouble in deciding as to what to wear!! By this time her husband was on the threshold of an outburst of anger and called her again, this time not so pleasantly. 'I don't know what to wear for this occasion' she said apologetically. 'Could you please help me out?' By this time he was totally irritated and said 'I let you buy whatever you want but still ….okay I decide 1 for you. Why don't you wear the red one which I presented to you last month?' 'This is a flimsy chiffon. Too expensive for this get together'. 'You have reason for every thing, however flimsy it may be. The problem is that you have too many. Come fast'. Vimala said 'but I have nothing to wear for this occasion' ('I must buy one to suit occasions of this sort' she resolved and reluctantly wore as per husband's suggestion.) Well Vimala was suffering from a particular syndrome. Her case is not unique as this is the scenario in almost all the houses as woman, ladies or girls as the case may be, irrespective of any differences in age, class, etc. suffer as long as they have not lost interest in life. It is an universal syndrome affecting especially Indian Woman. Well it is 'I Have Nothing To Wear Syndrome'. A MATTER OF LANGUAGE Over a telephonic conversation aunt told her niece that her daughter has been getting admissions in some of the Universities in States and of which Ohio sounded appealing and if she knows anything about that for which she replied, all I have heard is that 'The teacher asked the students,’ Children, of all the places in our country tell me which one you like best.’ One said 'New Jersey', 'Florida' the other and so on, but one kid to show off said 'Massachusetts Sir'. 'Could you please spell it?' 'I prefer Ohio Sir' was the prompt reply. An employed mother-in-law was to visit her son's place abroad. This being her first foreign trip there was a lot of excitement around and frequent calls from her only son. Daughter-in-law asked her 'Mother how do you feel about your coming here? Very excited!' Mother-in-law retorted 'How do you feel about it? That is most important.' The lady was pushing her way through to the entrance in a crowded DTC bus. Suddenly she saw a man telling her something in Hindi with a painful face. Puzzled 'Could you please repeat yourself in English?' she asked. 'Madam, my feet is under your feet!' She failed to realize that all along she was stamping his feet!! Radha Seshadri August 2002 BACK to the Main Page