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He would have been the happiest person at the wedding. Wherever he is, I'm sure Deepu would have watched the proceedings proudly as Shoba went through the wedding rituals on the 3rd and 4th of September. I cannot imagine him missing it for any reason. The image of his happy, carefree demeanour kept coming to me all the time throughout the function. I'm sure many others would have felt the same way but few discussed it openly for obvious reasons. Deepu used to adore his sister. I have never seen them fight nor heard of their fights, though fights among siblings are common (even among grown-ups!). It is difficult to believe that three years have gone by since that terrible tragedy. The memories of Deepu and Sriram are fresh and I thought I should share some of mine with the rest of the family.
I remember Deepu as one of the naughtiest boys in the family. He always had an impish smile. What shocked me (and amused me) about his childhood is that he was tied everyday by a rope to the window when my sister Pushpa left for office because his grandmother found it very difficult to manage him. He bore this ordeal without complaint and one day, when his mother, in a hurry to leave for office forgot to tie him up, the 3-year old Deepu reminded her, " Amma, ennai katti podalaiye". No wonder my sister was moved to tears.
I always used to admire Deepu's amazing power of concentration. Whether he was studying history or geography or reading Ananda Vikatan or Kumudam, it was impossible to divert his attention. This is probably one reason why he did so well in studies without seeming to work very hard.
Since my sister Pushpa was staying in Kodambakkam, we didn't have many occasions to see Deepu as a student from close quarters. We saw much more of him after he started working, first in Ramco Cements and then in Saudi Arabia. Somehow I never received any letter or email from him. He and Sriram became very close since both of them were doing the same course and whenever he came to Madras on vacation he used to visit us invariably accompanied by Sriram. Warm and generous, he had that casual, confident air about him and loved to tease others irrespective of their age. It was the kind of teasing that would make you smile and enjoy the joke, even if you are the target. I vividly remember how he teased Raghu's daughter Vidya at the time of my father's sathabhishekam and continued teasing her till she boarded the aircraft. We all loved talking to him and felt very happy and proud that he was doing so well in his career which was most cruelly cut short.
My earliest memory of Sriram was as a 2-year old. He had come to Ramanathapuram, where I was Sub-Collector, with his parents sometime in 1976. Every child has some distinctive feature but Sriram stood out even among children because of his chubby cheeks. Looking at the child one always thought he had two bondas stuck perpetually in his mouth. This made his eyes look smaller than they actually were and he had a very endearing, innocent, questioning look on his face. He was fascinated by the exercises that I used to do in the morning. '' Mama, naanum ekkach pannren" he would say and move his little hands and legs in the most adorable fashion. So a new word was coined and to this day it is only 'ekkach' between me and Kausalya, and not exercise. And thanks to this word, not a day passes without my thinking about Sriram.
Another image that is still fresh in my mind is that of little Sriram sitting on the balcony of the house in Saiva Muthiah Mudali Street at least for half an hour everyday waiting anxiously for his mother to return from office. How his face lit up when he sighted her at the end of the road. Once she reached home, he wouldn't have time for any of us, not even his grandfather who looked after him for most part of the day and was so proud of him.
Like most of us, Sriram had a passion for cricket. But unlike many of us, he along with Ramesh , used to play the game regularly and quite well. He was an active member of the 'Shastrinagar Sharks' and organized tournaments every year at the Corporation playground near our house. I remember how busy and excited Sriram was when it was first organized. The matches would start late in the evening and go on till 11-11.30 in the night. It was great fun watching these matches. What gave me greater happiness was watching the pride and satisfaction on Sriram's face. Whenever test matches were held in Madras, I used to look forward to getting complimentary passes not because I wanted to go but because Sriram was very eager to be part of the show. A quiet boy normally, he was at his animated best when discussing the game on his return from Chepauk. Among all my nephews, he was the one who visited our house most regularly, on some errand or the other. He was always at his best behaviour, consciously so as I learnt later, and would never utter a wrong word.
Sriram grew up to be a handsome young man who was fond of and enjoyed the good things of life. He was perhaps the best dressed among my nephews. He was more mature and responsible than boys of his age, very conscientious and hardworking. I always thought he would be an asset to any organization. No wonder the IT Manager of Al Essa, where he had his training, in a certificate issued on 27th October,1999 " found Sriram to have a positive social impact on those around him" He went on to say " Mr.Sriram will add great value to any organization he joins". Little would he have expected that Sriram would the very next day join an organisation in " the undiscovered country, from whose bourn no traveler returns."
"The soul is eternal;" says the Gita, " it has no birth or death and therefore there is nothing to grieve about the soul. On the other hand the body is insentient and by its very nature is subject to change. Hence there is no point in grieving over the loss or death of the body which is natural and unavoidable". Wise words, these. But we are not enlightened enough to take such a detached view and not grieve over the untimely passing of two such lovable boys in a gruesome manner. And grieve we will, as long as our souls remain with our bodies. For, as someone said, grief is the price we pay for love.
R. santhanam
28th October 2002
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