(2001)

review by:

6-9-03

Written by: David Quinn Directed by: Brian Yuzna Starring: Mark Frost, Isabel Brook, Jeffrey Combs, Andrew Divoff

When John Jaspers, after being brutally attacked, awakens to find his lover dead, he sells his soul to the sinister M to gain the power to take his revenge. But Jaspers soon finds out that he's got more than he bargained for, and he'll need to defy Hell itself in order to save the world and the woman he loves (pretty fast for a guy whose previous girlfriend was just killed). What do you get when you mix a Bruce Campbell look-a-like, Willem Dafoe's personality and voice, Wolverine's claws, and Batman's costume? Well, you'd think you'd get something cool, but instead you get Faust, Spawn's ugly gay older brother. I say older because apparently the graphic novel that this movie is based on predates Spawn by a few years, so it wouldn't really be fair to call this movie a Spawn rip-off. However, age does not come before beauty in this case as this movie has none of the depth or intrigue one finds in Spawn. And don't blame that on a bad adaptation of the source material, since the screenwriter, David Quinn, was one the original writers of the graphic novel. The writing actually isn't all that bad, and the acting is pretty good for most. Jeffrey Combs (Dan Margolis) of course can do no wrong, and Andrew Divoff (M) is great at doing his Andrew Divoff-thing (nearly identical to his performances in the Wishmaster movies). Unfortunately, as we all know, it only takes one to spoil the whole thing, and Mark Frost (John Jaspers/Faust) does just that. He spends nearly the entire movie with a cross-eyed, lip-thrusting, pouting expression on his face in an attempt to look distressed, but only succeeds in making himself look like he's got his balls caught in a bear trap. When will these over-the-top actors realize how much their performances hurt their own movies? One thing this movie has plenty of is T&A, though perhaps a bit too much. One scene in particular shows Claire (Monica van Campen), M's right-hand succubus, melting in a puddle of her own breasts and buttocks. And just what was that white, gelatinous substance dripping from her naughty bits? I think I'd rather not know... Good direction and set design, along with a fairly decent soundtrack (including Fear Factory, Coal Chamber, and bunch of heavy metal bands you've never heard of), keep this movie from being complete crap. There's also something amusing about watching a guy who looks like Batman, after having been through a blender, run around stabbing people. It's by no means the best of what the horror and action genres have to offer, but I can think of many worse movies to waste one's time on.

AKA: Bare Devil          Sex, Lies, and Vigilantism

Rating