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By VGIRL
Foon stood in the entrance of the room. A glass of Strawberry flavored Koolaid sat on the table. "Sir?" he asked timidly. "Yes, Foon." said KDM, stopping to drink a big gulp of Koolaid. "Spork knows." "Well, we couldn't hide it forever, could we? "No, Spork knows it isn't human." KDM spit some of his Koolaid out. "How could Spork know that?" Foon grimanced. "Dr. Future tells us that Spork is a virgin Spork." KDM calmed down. He took another swig of his Koolaid. "Does Krycek know?" "I don't think so." "I don't care what you think, Foon. I won't care until you know." KDM looked at him intently. "You know what you must do?" "But sir-" " I know you don't want to do this to Spork. For some reason you keep your treacherous thoughts of helping Spork. But you must know what happens if you do." Foon looked down. "I do." "Good" KDM said, satisfied. "Then you will do it?" "I will." Foon turned and left. KDM
took another drink of his Koolaid.
Krycek stared at Spork. Spork stared at Krycek. "You .... you are pregnant?" Krycek's mind raced. "From.....from Jonap?" "No." Spork said shakily. "What?? If it's not Jonap's...who could...MeepSpork?" Krycek said finally realizing the implications of this. "Yes." Spork spoke in one word sentences because Spork was so distraught. "I am only speaking in one word sentences today because I am so distraught." Krycek looked at Spork again. Spork looked at Krycek. "Are you sure?" "I think so." Krycek looked at Spork in terror. "I've got..to go." He hurried out of the stuffy attic room. Spork sat in the room, holding back
tears. Krycek raced out of the FBI office, extremely distraught. "psst" said a voice softly from the bushes. "Hello?" Krycek said. After a few seconds passed with no response he decided it must be in his head. "psst..krycek!" Krycek looked around him nervously and stepped into the alley. He had entered the "ghetto" of the FBI common ground. It was Spnork! "I've got some information
you will want to know the shadowy figure said.
Dr. Future stepped into the dimly lit office. She gave a nervous glance around the room filled with "Felix the Cat" paraphanelia (gosh darnit, I can't spell this damn word). For some reason, that scared her the most about this most disturbing man "Sir?" she said tremblingly "Dr. Future." the voice said calmly. One hand rested on a glass of green koolaid. "I see you have returned." "Well, yes, sir. I am standing here." "Are you? Are we all just standing here?" KDM said with an air of profoundness to him. "Good" KDM turned to look at her.
Dr. Future saw his green tongue and tried to suppress a giggle. "Now here
is what you must do......"
Krycek looked around him and stepped into the empty warehouse with Spnork. "Krycek, I've got some important information." Spnork said. "What is it?" Krycek said sharply and then quickly apologized. "Sorry, it's been an off day". "It's about Spork." Spnork continued. "Foon and Koolaid Drinking Man are after her." Krycek looked at Spnork in horror. "Why?" Spnork continued."Because of what Spork is, what Spork means." Krycek looked confused. "Go on" "Well, they've inlisted the help of one Dr.Future..' Krycek looked up again in horror. "That's Spork's OB! Spork is there now! I've got to go!" Krycek tried to run away, but Spnork grabbed him by his fake arm. It came off. Spnork handed it back to him saying "I don't know if you can protect Spork. The stakes have risen, Alex. Be careful!" Krycek thanked Spnork and ran away
into the afternoon.
Spork walked up to Spork's apartment and sighed. It had been a long day. Spork didn't know what to think. Spork decided to take a long bubble bath. Spork walked up to the bathroom and then- Random Spandex Man ran in! He danced around and sang "FEBRUARY STARS FLOATING IN THE DARK! I'VE WAITING HERE FOR YOU EVERLONG! SOMETIMES I FEEL I'M GETTING STUCK BETWEEN THE HANDSHAKE AND THE FU-" *BAM* Spork heard a gunshot and saw Random Spandex Man fall to the ground. Spork looked up to see who had shot Random Spandex Man. It was Foon! "Hi Spork." Foon said with a particulary menacing looking on Foon's face. "Foon!" Spork cried nervously. "What, what are you doing here?" "I think you know." Sporks mind raced. "You want those back issues of Better Homes and Gardening and the patio furniture I borrowed a while back?" Foons eyes lit up. "I forgot about those! Yes! I would like those back!" Foon quickly reminded Foon why Foon was there. "But that's not why I'm here." "The Bath and Body Works scented candle?" "Well...Yes I want that back too." Foon said grumpily. Spork swallowed nervously. Spork had no other items belonging to Foon. What could Foon possibly want besides?? Spork looked down at Spork's stomach and looked up in horror. Foon gave Spork a curt nod. "I will not give you back your customized western belt we got in Texas!" Spork yelled. "You said I could have it!" Foon slapped Foon in the head. "THAT'S NOT WHAT I WANT!" Foon yelled angrily. "I WANT YOUR BABY!" Spork blinked. "Well why didn't you just say so?" "Well, I thought it was readily apparent." "Well, you know what happens when you assume, Foon dearest. You make an ASS out of U and ME." Spork chuckled. Spork had always thought that was pretty clever. Foon growled. Foon had always been
irritated by that. "So, gimme your baby!"
Krycek ran through the park near the pond. It was a shortcut to Spork's house. He had to get to Spork's house before Foon or KDM did... Krycek stopped suddenly stopped and stared in disbelief. In the middle of the part was a orange fort with the sign "NO ALIENS" duct-taped to it. "What the??" Krycek thought. He suddenly felt compelled to go play in the fort. "EEEYYYAAA I AM THE FORT KING!" Krycek
ran in and out of the fort.
Dr. Future sat in her clinic deep in thought. Her assistant, the brave and noble Chia tapped her on the shoulder. "Go away fool! Can't you see I'm deep in thought?" "Dr. Future, someone is here to see you." "Tell them to go away." Chia hesistated. "It's Milly Biles Dr. Future sat up quickly. "Tell Spnork to come in here now!" Chia dashed out the door, hurridly ran to the lobby, and calmly stepped into the waiting room. She gave Milly Biles a smile. "Dr. Future will see you now." "Thank you Chia." Milly Biles stood up and nodded at her. "This way." Chia led Milly Biles to Dr.Future's office. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Will Krycek stop being the Fort King
in time to save Spork?
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