AFTERGLOW

TRIO: crucifix, magnifying glass, peppers
QUOTE: "O Lord, make me chaste -- but not now." (St. Augustine)

This takes place just after Talking In Your Sleep, Trio #1 Challenge response. Thanks Susan for the quick read through.

~~~~~

Vera sat stunned looking upon her lover in a new light. He was awake, truly awake, and he had definitely not been joking. Marcus Grisham had actually killed Don Raphael Alvarado, Vera's only friend's father, because he was going to tell Gaspar about Vera and the Captain's affair? Vera had assumed, in some small recess of her mind, that Montoya had been the mastermind behind Don Alvarado's fatal `fall from his horse'. Montoya had seemed so pleased that Alvarado died; Vera had the feeling that he had ordered Raphael's death for some reason. Everyone knew that since Don Alvarado was an excellent horseman, it would be fate's cruel joke that he died in such a manner. It didn't fit. But of course, no one had ever dared utter their suspicions.

Vera remembered Gaspar mentioning how strange the whole burial had been, mostly that it had been completed so quickly. He was Raphael's friend and protege. Everything that Gaspar was in Alta California had a lot to do with Don Alvarado taking him under his wing and showing him the ropes. How to be curt to the Court without the King getting riled was a fine art that had been taught to Gaspar. They were steadfast friends. Vera had known that from the first moment she had arrived in Santa Helena as Gaspar's bride. Don Alvarado was the first one that Gaspar had introduced his new wife to, as if Raphael was his father, and needed his approval.

It didn't take a lot of thought to know that pride and honor meant everything to a Don. If Raphael had the slightest inkling of Vera's indiscretion, he would certainly tell his friend, Gaspar, at the soonest opportunity. It would be better to deal with an unfaithful wife in the privacy of your own home than be the laughing stock of Alta California when the news became public. Vera shuddered when she remembered one evening after dinner when Gaspar and Raphael were a bit on the tipsy side. Raphael had quoted the line, "Oh Lord, make me chaste-but not now," as he looked upon her. Vera, at the time, had wondered if Raphael had found out about Vera and Marcus' first one night stand, if it was written all over her face or not, if Raphael had a magnifying glass to her soul. At the time, she had put it down to getting a laugh with a friend, neither knowing how they had affected her with the truth of the words.

"You are joking," Vera was finally able to utter to Grisham, intently watching her for her reaction to the news. She added a nervous giggle, still not being able to accept what could very well be the reason for Don Alvarado's untimely death.

Grisham cocked an eyebrow and replied, "You think I joke about murder, or that I would joke about us?"

"No, of course not," Vera said, standing, turning away, still hoping it was all a joke. She looked up at the crucifix on the wall, and said a little prayer that it was a joke. Her eyes teared up suddenly as if she had munched into a whole jalapeno.

Grisham caught her hand and kept her seated on the bed. "Now that you know, what are you going to do?"

"Do? I need to do something?" Vera spoke as if she was in a faraway place, thinking about anything but the conversation at hand.

"No," Grisham said. "You cannot do a thing with this knowledge. You cannot tell anyone. If you do, I will tell them about our affair and that you knew about his death all along, and who would not believe me?"

"You expect me to tell Gaspar that you killed his friend because I was sleeping with you?"

"Not Gaspar, but I wouldn't put it past you to tell Maria Teresa."

"You think that I would tell her that my lover killed her father to protect our secret? Yes, that would really put me in the best light possible."

"I don't give a damn about your light. I've been wanting to tell you for a while now. I figure since I finally got into your bedroom, you were willing to know just what I'd do to protect what we have."

Have? Vera's mind whirled. All we have are a few trysts. She couldn't admit to herself that Grisham ever meant more than that, and certainly wouldn't now. He killed Tessa's father, she kept saying to herself over and over again, it was still not making any sense. "But Colonel Montoya..."

"What about him?"

"Does he know?"

"Yes, of course. He is my superior."

"Gaspar had his suspicions that Montoya had Raphael killed."

Grisham giggled. "Montoya didn't cry over the old man's death, that's for sure, but I did have a lot of explaining to do when he died."

"You did this alone? You shot him and he fell off his horse and broke his back?"

"I don't know if he broke his back, could have. We didn't have a doc then. Ah, those were the days."

"Who knows about this?"

"Only four people who are still alive. I had three soldiers with me. I didn't want them to follow me out of Santa Helena as I tried to stop Alvarado on his way over here, but they would have been suspicious if I made them return to the pueblo. One is dead. I trust Juarez and Santos with my life. They are loyal to me and know that as far up the ladder I go, they are right there with me. I make sure they get paid well and don't have to do the dirty work. They haven't told anyone so far, so don't worry about it."

Vera was still not thinking straight when she said aloud, "That is two..."

"Montoya and," Grisham said as he chucked her nose with his finger. "You."

"Why did you tell me?" she asked again, not remembering if he had answered her before.

"Because you still have no idea how I really feel about you," Grisham murmured into her ear as he brought her in closer. "You just wouldn't hear it. Even last night, you invited me here, but won't really let me in." His finger circled the skin covering her heart.

"I agree," Vera said, trying not to sound as angry or bewildered as she truly felt. "I had no idea how you felt..." She was put on her back as Grisham covered her, started kissing her neck. Vera tensed and felt herself start to cry as she focused on the ceiling. "I had no idea..."

~~~~~

Getting Grisham out of her house that morning was a hard proposition as he felt that since Vera knew the extent of his commitment to her, he should be a guest as long as Gaspar would be away. She hadn't wanted to rile him, but she didn't want him in her home any longer either. With the pretense that she was going to lunch with Tessa, Vera just got into the carriage and left. After parking the carriage on the other side of some trees to have a clear view to her hacienda, she only had to wait less than an hour before Grisham rode back to town. Tessa wouldn't be expecting her, but Vera needed to see her.

Vera urged the horses to move by snapping the reins against them. She was almost to the Alvarado hacienda when she stopped them and had to think this through. She touched her flushed cheeks, knowing that as soon as Tessa would take one look at her, she would know there was something terribly wrong. Vera felt terrible when she realized that she was trepidatious about telling Tessa about Grisham's deed because she wasn't sure how she could be blamed for it. It was quite the quandary for Vera since she had found out the truth of Don Alvarado's death that morning. She couldn't be happier that Gaspar hadn't found out about her indiscretion. But, his friend had been killed because of it. Because of her. Vera had known that there was something dangerous about Marcus Grisham all along. That was part of the thrill. Not only was he cute, sexy, funny, crafty, but there was a recklessness to him that Vera couldn't resist. Now, she knew that his devil may care attitude might actually be the devil's work. What would Grisham do if word leaked out about Raphael's death? Vera was confident that Grisham felt deeply for her, but would he sacrifice that love to seek revenge from her?

It was horrible! Tessa needed to know, a true friend would tell her as soon as possible. But Vera was too worried about Grisham's reaction to Tessa demanding justice for her father's murderer. Again, could Vera be held responsible as well? Vera cried out at the hopelessness of the situation to her point of view. She couldn't rely on Grisham, not any longer. She certainly couldn't confide in her husband. She couldn't tell her friend the truth and break her heart.

As soon as Tessa heard the truth of her father's death, the first thing she would do was go to Montoya. Montoya... Colonel Montoya may well be the only one Vera could turn to during this nightmare.

Vera steered the horses to turn the carriage towards town feeling hopeful that the ruthless, devilishly smart and persuasive Colonel could tell her what to do.

~~~~~

As soon as Vera made her way into Santa Helena, Grisham saw her. She was worried that he would come to her, make it known to one and all that they were an item, or at least used to be. Needless worry, she realized, as he had only gave her his usual smoldering but fleeting look and went back to his work with recruits. No one could be the wiser. To Grisham's public demeanor, there was nothing different about today than yesterday. He had been marching the troops toward Montoya's headquarters, in the same direction that she was headed. Before too long, her carriage stopped at the bottom of Montoya's outside staircase. As soon as she could set down the reins, a gloved hand appeared to her left. Grisham smiled into the carriage as she took her arm. "Señora Hidalgo, allow me to assist you."

To not take his hand would not only signal to Grisham that something was wrong, but also the troops might be able to read something into it. Out the corner of her eye, she saw Santos walk down the steps from Headquarters, and for the first time, Vera deemed his ever-present smile on his face as knowing. Damn him! Damn them all!

She displayed her best smile and clasped Grisham's hand, and stepped from the carriage. "Thank you, Capitan," she sweetly said as she walked from him. She could hear him say, "I see Maria Teresa is at Helm's. Moth to a flame, I'd say."

"Yes, we will be lunching later," she whispered to continue her lie to him and didn't look back. She walked halfway up the steps when she heard an old crotchety voice bluster from the balcony, "What in the blazes do you want?"

Vera stopped surprised, and then saw Montoya's aunt Beatriz hobble to the top step. "Luis is in a terribly foul mood this morning," Beatriz said. "If you want a favor, now is not the time to ask for it."

"Oh," Vera said, her mind suddenly a blank slate. Too many things had happened since she woke up that morning and the infamous Beatriz was someone she hadn't counted on encountering.

"You want something, right?" the old woman questioned. "You all want something, but not one of you will do a thing for my nephew."

"What would he like for any of us to do?" Vera asked honestly.

"You know what I mean. The man works like a dog to make sure you are all safe and this pueblo runs smoothly. Does he get any thanks?"

"Perhaps another time," Vera said defeated as she turned to walk back to down to her carriage.

Montoya stepped out of his office and said, "Se±ora Hidalgo, what a pleasant surprise."

Vera spun around and gripped the rail so as not to fall backward down the stairs. "Colonel. I do not wish to disturb you... I ... should have announced my visit... I should have... I..."

Montoya looked at Beatriz and asked, "Have you been badgering the Señoras again?"

Beatriz shrugged. "Not any more than usual."

"Go bother the cook," he suggested.

"I did that this morning."

"Go make sure you did a thorough job."

"I am thorough in everything I do," she assured him.

"Get lost." Montoya smiled as his aunt walked away. "You never seem to do a thorough job of that."

"What would you do without me?"

Montoya shook his head as he held his hand out to Vera. "One can always wonder. Please, Se±ora Hidalgo, brighten my day for a few moments."

"Yes, Colonel," Vera said, taking his hand, and letting him led her into the lair of his office.

TBC