Sleeping with a Stranger

She turns off the light in silence
she sees him laying there
Beneath the covers with the pretense
that he doesn't really care ~
As an emptiness fills her soul
she settles into bed
But thoughts prevented her from sleep,
with the painful words they'd said.

He'd yelled at her, she'd screamed at him
throwing insults at one another
Arguing over the little things
they used to love about each other ~
The distant memory of happiness
as they spat heated words
For the habit of disagreement
now replaced what they once were.

Once she loved everything about him
and the way he'd made her feel;
But their years together only showed
it was never something real ~
The childish boy inside of him
which she used to adore
Now frustated and infuriated her
whenever he walked through the door.

She used to love his boyish smile
and his dancing eyes
When he undressed her with the look
that she now despised ~
And the way that he would sing to her
at friendly gatherings
That used to make her feel special
now only made her cringe.

She remembers that after a hard day
she came home to candlelight
When he cooked her favourite meal
and made love to her all night ~
The way he used to touch her
sent shivers down her spine;
But she hasn't felt that thrill
in a very long time.

She remembers all their good times
were filled with happiness
But now the years have been replaced
by a silent emptiness ~
They no longer share the intimacy
of their dreams or fears
They only talk to yell and scream
through bitterness and tears.

The memories of much happier times
still linger in her mind
When they promsied it would be forever,
but forever is a long time ~
She thought they would grow together
but they have grown apart
Two people who once joined as one
are now two empty hearts.

She looked over at him sleeping there
and wondered at their fate
Why did the man she used to love
had she grown to hate?
She reached to touch her hand to him
but she stopped and pulled away
Too much had come between them now,
there were no words left to say.

She closes her eyes and tries to forget
the harsh words they had said
For they once agreed to never take
their anger to their bed ~
But now they sleep as strangers
after all these years;
Still he has never stopped loving her
as he gently sheds a tear.

© Christina
20th September, 2002

"One of my favourite movies is "The Story of Us" with Bruce Willis and Michelle Pfeiffer.   It tells of the story of a couple who have been married for 15 years and decide to split up.   It is the story of their lives, loves, marriage and separation.   It is the story of their desperation, disappointments, their "highs and lows".   It is the story of them.   I think most married couples will agree with me that many experience this transition, this confusion when they reach this kind of crossroads together.
I decided to write a poem about a couple who feel that they have fallen out of love with one another, and the things they used to love about the other, they now hate.   About a couple who were so comfortable with one another, that now they are  uncomfortable together.   They used to share everything, and now they share nothing.   They used to talk about everything with each other, now the only time they talk is to fight and yell and scream at one another.   This poem is written from a woman's point of view, and how she questions that what they had and how he used to make her feel wasn't real.  And the man she once loved, she feels she has grown to hate.    We see her enveloped by memories of much happier times, though too many words have been said to take back the pain and start again.  We see her questioning their marriage.  And in the end, we see that despite all the fighting and agruing, he still loves her and always has.  And how it breaks his heart that they fight like this.
This is the story of one couple, though it has no happy ending.    I think this poem sums up what many people go through today with their marriages, all because they stop talking ~ really talking and listening.   Don't let this happen to you."