Chapter Twenty Three: On One Side of Greece and the Other
Ares was bored.
The God of War sat in one of his many temples, draped across his marble throne and idly stroking the silky brown hair of the young, comely priestess who knelt obediently at his feet. In the dark recesses of his mind, he was brooding over what he might be doing with Xena right now, if only she'd give up her foolish crusade and return to his side. If only she would become his Warrior Queen, he would love her like no mere mortal man ever could, and he would elevate her to the ranks of the gods as his wife and consort . . . and mother of his child.
He frowned most passionately as he recalled what happened the afternoon of the Battle of Amphipolis, and in his own temple, no less! There Xena was, swathed only in fur, offering him wine and promising everything he had ever wanted. Sure, he'd allowed himself to be duped into that situation, but he wouldn't trade those few minutes of holding Xena in his arms for anything.
Ares growled deeply in his throat as he relived the moment Xena first sank her teeth into his flesh before claiming his mouth in a searing kiss, her hot, naked body grinding into his. Indeed, none of his priestesses had the fire of the Warrior Princess, and none could ever possibly hope to conquer the God of War the way Xena had.
~ Perhaps I should not have neglected her so much early on, ~ Ares considered, remembering how "amused" he'd been with the young upstart warrioress, but not realizing her true worth until it was too late, when his meddlesome brother had converted her lust for war into a passion for justice. By then, it was too late to easily seduce her. When Xena was a girl, Ares suspected his attentions would have been welcome, and would have perhaps earned him a permanent place in her bedroll. Instead, he had waited until too late to tempt her, and now his efforts at wooing her were being met with all sorts of resistance.
A smile reluctantly crept across his face as he remembered his most effective ploy yet - invading her dreams with the help of his cousin, Morpheus. In Xena's dreamscape, he had been able to catch her passion and experience it as far as her dreams would allow, yet he knew that nothing would compare to his first, real time with her, whenever that should be, and the scene in Amphipolis was the closest he'd been able to get to that with the Warrior Princess.
"You are troubled, my lord?" questioned the young priestess, sensing his unrest through his fingers as they alternately pulled and caressed her brown locks.
"Mmmm," Ares growled lowly in reply, neither affirming nor denying his state of unrest.
The priestess, known as Nika, stood up before him and began to slowly untie the golden rope that held her white gown closed, preparing to offer herself to him as she had so many times before, but he waved her off without even considering the possibility that a night with one of his favorite priestesses might take the edge off.
No, he wouldn't even think of it while Xena inhabited his every thought and action, and held his heart so entirely captive. It was too . . . disloyal . . . somehow, although at this point he wasn't exactly sure how. He truly wasn't used to such feelings as he was now experiencing, so he put full trust in his instincts that he should pass on the priestess' most charming offer. Besides, he somehow knew he'd only end up even more dissatisfied because it would not be Xena that he was making love to, and that was just too much for him. What more, it would not be fair to Nika, whose loyalty had been impeccable through the last few years, and he would not lie that he cared for her deeply. Hurting the reluctant priestess was not an option.
"Thank you, Nika, but no," he managed to speak rather civilly in spite of his lack of civil thought at the moment. He then pulled himself out of the chair, thinking on perhaps going to spy on the Warrior Princess, wherever she was, but the young priestess interceded.
"Wait, my lord Ares!" she begged gently as she stood and placed her hands comfortingly on his chest. "You have made me your priestess, and I have always served you faithfully - if you cannot tell me your troubles, then to whom might you tell them?"
Ares looked down and considered Nika closely. He hadn't expected much from the girl when he originally made her a priestess as punishment for not making offerings to him, but Nika had come to surprise him greatly over the years, and he often found himself turning to her for friendship, as well as service. "True," he finally nodded, lowering his body back into his chair of stone.
"You know you may tell me anything, my lord," Nika insisted as she knelt again at his feet and placed her arms lovingly on his knees. Ares reached out to caress her cheek.
"I know, Nika, but you may not want to hear what I have to say."
Nika frowned slightly, sensing that she probably wasn't going to enjoy hearing his confession, but she wanted very much to help her master ease his burden. "Please tell me, my lord?"
Ares was silent for a few moments before finally taking a deep breath and saying, "I am in love with Xena."
"Xena," Nika echoed. "The Warrior Princess?"
"The one and only."
Nika's brow furrowed in confusion before she questioned him most respectfully, "Forgive me, my lord Ares, but Xena? Did she not leave your service after she was made your 'chosen'?"
"She never exactly knew that she was my 'chosen,' Nika," Ares confessed further as he leaned back a bit in his throne and looked up at the ceiling. "I always feared that I would ruin a good thing if I let her know - she was already so fierce, so forceful, so . . . passionate! But, then my brother had to meet up with her . . . and the rest is history."
Nika nodded slowly, for she did indeed know of her master's desire to bring Xena back into his fold, but now it all made sense why he had gone to such lengths to woo her back when it became quite clear that the warrior woman had no intentions of serving him ever again, or any of the other gods of Olympus, for that matter.
"I know how hard this must be for you, my lord," she commiserated from her own life's experience. "Unrequited love is difficult."
"Unrequited love," Ares echoed grimly, hating the combination of words instantly for everything they meant, for that was indeed how he felt. He had done almost everything short of having Aphrodite put a spell on Xena to make her love him in return, and nothing had worked.
"I am so sorry, my lord," Nika said most sincerely, seeing that he was indeed struggling with an emotion that the God of War was not used to. "I wish I knew how to help you - "
"Tell me what I'm doing wrong," he instantly commanded, though he knew instinctively that no mere, mortal woman could possibly understand the intricate depths of the Warrior Princess' psyche, and in fact, Nika's jaw dropped slightly in surprise at the command.
"I - I wouldn't presume . . . ," she stammered, afraid to insult the easily-angered god.
"Never mind," Ares dismissed the order with mild exasperation, for he realized that his priestesses weren't really privy to most of his actions, anyway. Nika could not possibly comment on that which she had never seen, and it was unfair to ask it of her.
"My lord, perhaps you are trying too hard?" Nika ventured rather prophetically, and he looked to her with renewed interest.
"What do you mean?"
"Well," Nika took a deep breath, "it's like hunting, my lord - the more vigorously you pursue your quarry, the faster it will run. Does that make sense?"
"In a way," Ares shrugged, thinking of all his over-aggressive ploys to overtake Xena and drag her - kicking and screaming, if he had to - back into his service, and back into his bedchamber. "I've chased her off - is that what you're saying?"
"Not completely, my lord," she continued, knowing that the intricacies of the female mind were hard enough to explain to mortal men. "The fact that your paths continue to cross, with or without your effort, must surely mean something, and the fact that you are here now, seeking advice, is a good sign that you are willing to change for her - "
"Change for her!?" Ares echoed incredulously, then almost bellowed, "I am the God of War! How am I supposed to change that?"
"I do not know, my lord," Nika replied nervously, afraid that she'd insulted him, but unable to hold her tongue when her master was obviously in so much personal pain. "However, if I know you, my lord, you will do whatever is necessary to earn her love."
"Earn her love," he repeated unhappily. "I tried that when I offered to protect her and her daughter, Eve, . . ."
"But?" the priestess prompted, sensing more to the offer, somehow.
"But," Ares frowned, "in return, she must give me a child."
"My lord Ares!" Nika pulled back sharply. "You cannot place such conditions on your love - the human heart does not work that way!"
"So, how does it work, Nika?" he demanded, becoming more agitated by the minute.
"That is hard to say, my lord," the young priestess replied with a small shrug. "Each of us were designed by your father and the Fates to be individual and unique. I would not presume to tell you what another woman is thinking without having first lived her life."
"I see," Ares grumbled lightly, his mind now suddenly elsewhere - Macedonia, in fact - and he stood up rather abruptly, almost callously knocking her over as he did so, and without apology. "Thank you for your insight, Nika."
"You are welcome, my lord," she replied uncertainly, for something within her told her that the god had yet another trick up his sleeve that he was anxious to play, and she shook her head slowly as she watched him disappear.
In the fading sunlight, Hercules threw another log on the fire and hunkered down for another cold winter's night sleeping alone on the forest floor. He'd been traveling alone for many moons now - almost a full year's cycle, in fact - without any of his myriad of companions popping up to fill in the time with their antics, and he was beginning to feel lonely for even the face of the odd cook Falafel.
~ Heck, I'd even welcome a visit from Salmoneus! ~ he thought unhappily as he wrapped his arms tightly about himself, sincerely wishing that Iolaus hadn't gone back to Corinth in defeat and were there now to tell his usually unfunny jokes and generally keep him company.
"I'm not Iolaus, but will I do?" Aphrodite's voice quipped before she materialized in her usual array of pastel sparkles, looking as fetching as ever in a new outfit of pink lace and sheer silk netting.
Hercules grinned at his comely sister and rose up to greet her warmly, "Hello, Aphrodite - how have you been?"
"Fabulous! Couldn't be better, Bro! The world is my oyster shell!" she gushed, her act not fooling her demi-god half-brother in the least.
"Fabulous, eh?"
"What can I say?" she shrugged alluringly and rolled her eyes. "I am the Goddess of Love!"
"So, why do I feel like something is wrong with you, then?" he asked lightly, but pointedly.
"Moi?" Aphrodite feigned shock at the accusation. "What could possibly be wrong with me?"
"That's a good question," Hercules folded his arms sternly, "but I can't help you til you answer it for me."
The goddess' feigned smile slowly faded, and her carefree visage reluctantly turned into a mask of worry, and she relented, 'Okay, Herc, I really didn't want to drag you into this again, but I don't think I have much of a choice any more, so I'll tell you - It's Sorrow and Iolaus."
"Sorrow and Iolaus?" he echoed in surprise.
"Yeah - I really need your help making sure those two get back together," she explained, her voice quite serious. "And fast!"
"Fast? Why?" Hercules returned with suspicion. "I thought that it was made quite clear that Ares was going to do as he pleased and make her his wife. What makes you think he's going to let her go now?"
"Well, for one thing, Ares never married her, Herc, and for another, he hasn't seen her in months. I'd be surprised if he even remembers her any more!" the blonde goddess proclaimed indignantly, then turned a bit sheepish before confessing, "Actually, she's sorta already free of him - "
"How so!?"
"Your friend, Autolycus, the thief - he found her this morning and set her free."
"And I'll bet he had no trouble whatsoever finding her, right?"
"A goddess does what a goddess has to," Aphrodite shrugged, now appearing more serious than ever before. "The point is, we worked really hard to get those two lovebirds together, and now she's getting ready to have his baby - "
"His baby!?" Hercules started in great surprise. "You mean that Iolaus - ? I thought she was having Ares' child?"
"Well, now it looks like Curly managed to hit the ball outta the park early on in the game!" the goddess grinned lasciviously, but turned serious again quite quickly. "Truth is, she's going to need you to help protect her and the baby, and she needs Curly by her side to help her through this. I tried to give the poor guy some signs and clues as soon as I knew, since I couldn't exactly help him outright without ticking off Ares - you know, lots of pregnant women, or women with babies, or couples with babies, but they all just seemed to make him so sad." Aphrodite shook her pretty head slowly as she thought of how miserably her plan had worked, and continued, "Anyway, Xena and Autolycus are already on their way to find him, so I'm going to take you directly to the cave where she's hiding - "
"You didn't leave her there alone, did you!?"
"Of course not! Surely you didn't think I'd leave her totally alone at a time like this, did you!?" Aphrodite laughed. "She's with Joxer."
"Joxer!?" Hercules echoed, his voice a strained mixture of every emotion he'd ever felt toward the wannabe sidekick and occasional menace since the day he first met him.
"And Gabrielle!" Aphrodite added with feigned insult. "What sort of goddess do you take me for, anyway!? Of course I didn't leave her alone with him . . . well, not for long. Anyway, the point is, I'd help them more outright, Herc, but I'm now on my own in this - "
"Exactly what is this, anyway, Aphrodite?" he demanded. "You and Artemis and Athena were all thick as thieves when this all went down. What was that all about? And why aren't they with you now?"
The Goddess of Love pouted anew at being so closely questioned, but she knew from experience that her brother wouldn't help at all if she didn't tell him the truth, so she took a deep breath and spoke, "They were only helping me because they didn't want Ares starting up his little brood of psychotic baby boys, but actually, I had my own plans for the courtship of Iolaus and Sorrow . . ."
Aphrodite enlightened her demigod brother on the various reasons why she had worked so hard to ensure that the couple were united to begin with, and explained her reasons for reuniting them, focusing great emphasis on the fact that she was now alone in her quest to rejoin them for the birth of their child.
"Xena's baby seems to have drawn everyone's attention," she concluded petulantly. "They're all so worried about their own worthless hides, they're not even considering the future of humanity!"
"Well, I am truly surprised, Aphrodite!" Hercules nodded with great impression. "I truly never thought you would pick humans over the gods!"
"Hercules, hush!" she quickly quieted him, looking about for clandestine ears that weren't there. "If you ever repeat that, I'll deny every word of it!! . . . But, the truth is, humans are our father's only legacy that he was truly proud of, and I want to honor him by watching out for them."
She then smiled a bit slyly and added with a wink, "Besides, I learned a long time ago that as long as the human heart beats, a gal like me will be always be welcome around here! So, I engineered a little romance for the Goddess of Lamentation, and I need a little help keeping it from being ruined completely. Can I count on you, Bro?"
Hercules smiled," You don't have to ask, Aphrodite - I'm proud to help them . . . and you."
Aphrodite blushed and quickly kissed him on the cheek, "You're the best, Herc! Now, I'll transport you directly to the cave, but if they ask you how you got there, you haven't the slightest idea, okay?"
"You got it," he agreed, truly proud of his usually-selfish, narcissistic sister. True, the whole situation was ultimately to her own benefit, but her intent was clearly to the benefit of humanity as well, and it was that part of her plan that he wished to honor by taking on the mission.
"Oh, and be sure to remind Xena that Sorrow's baby is half-human, so it will be subject to the same complications a human baby would face!" she added as she raised her hand to work her magic, and she sent him on to the cave with a wiggle of her fingers. When he was gone, she looked about the abandoned camp proudly, congratulating herself on easily convincing her brother to help her. That alone was a great feat, though she knew instinctively that Hercules would always help when Iolaus' happiness came into question. It was just his nature. Still, she hadn't expected him to agree to it so quickly, and with no more persuasion than the simple truth.
"I'm getting way good at this!" she proclaimed happily, then blew out Herc's fire before taking herself elsewhere.