"Its so much better when everyone is in, Are you in? Its so much easier when everyone is in, Are you in?"

So yeah, its like some odd hour in the morning and here I sit at my computer toiling away to fix up this website....there would be no better time to listen to Incubus and write some sort of journal entry, which I seriously have neglected to do, but really meant to....it takes so damn long to put these crappy sites together....

I have been looking all over the net for pictures of my friends. I have come across a few that I dont know if I even want to add at this point. I have been spending too much time by myself in this house to have any real social life... Well, other than my other home which is over at Vanessa, Don, and Chris'.

I really miss the Mount and the times that I had there. I miss the mountains, I miss the way that I could always feel peaceful even if the world was crumbling at my feet. Here I feel alone and void of that happiness. I can't draw anymore, I cant write anything, I have lost, what I guess is what I should call my "art passion." That mountain was my muse.... without her I am lost and confused....

How many people did I take out there just to enjoy the view....

I think I become more of a hippy everyday. I need that in my life, just my peaceful and inspiring place. Carroll County is definately the opposite. I think that being here just drains me of my good karma. Sometimes late at night I can listen to my music and catch a bit of that feeling again, that feeling of my freedom, that feeling of having no cares, that feeling of being loved, that feeling that has no words for a description.... Its my everything....

I wish I didnt feel so lost here in this house that I have called home for almost 10 years. It doesnt feel like home. My car feels like more of a home to me. Thats it, check back tomorrow to see if I havent made it back out there for just one more drive about. Perhaps there will be some new poetry or something.