THE GARDEN SLOTH by M.L. Hannah

A Big Dose of Water Gets the Seeds to Germinate

I planted seeds at the community garden some time ago. Whenever I went to check on the progress of the garden there were no plants showing, except for the corn, squash and beans I planted at the south end of the garden, and some volunteer peas and sunflowers from last year. Even the weeds were laying low. There were a few pathetic sprigs of pigweed but not a stem of anything else peeping optimistically from the planted rows. I hoped the scarcity of greenery was from lack of rain, and I followed my spouse’s suggestion to sock the water to the garden. I thought if nothing else, the weeds would grow and then I could eradicate them.

Well, it worked but I may have made a mistake. I went and watered the garden again yesterday and I watered it very well. We had a large thunderstorm last night. Too bad for me that I didn’t check the weather forecast else I may be able to get in to weed the garden now. The pathways, sans the planned cardboard or leaf coverage, are paved with sticky mud.

I walked to the end of the garden along a muddy pathway carrying Witchy, my garden witch scarecrow, and as I walked the clay (did I tell you the community garden is mostly clay soil?) built up on the bottoms of my boots. I always wanted to be taller but I think I would rather buy platform sandals, to gain that extra height, because they wouldn’t stick to the ground the way my high-rise muddy boots did.

While pounding Witchy into the ground, I noted that her mop handle body had little trouble sinking into the soil until it encountered the hardpan base. That was a bit of a shock as it was not as far down as I had previously imagined. I indulged in a bit of imagination and mused that bits of a wartime wreck, from the former runway the garden is built on, were down there blocking me from pounding Witchy’s tail firmly into the soil.

To my knowledge, there weren’t any bits of wreckage left laying about runways. This particular runway was a sea of grass as far back as I could remember, not cement or asphalt. Suffice it to say that the topsoil is a little lacking in fibre and those leaves I mentioned should be happily absorbed into the soil, once I get around to adding them to the garden. In addition, I plan to chop my leftover plants and leave them on the soil over the winter. By spring the chopped up plants will have composted. Barring an infestation of some kind of horrible pest that is the easiest method I know for adding fibre to the soil.

After collecting several pounds of clay on my footwear, I regained the gravel drive and looked ruefully at the nice cardboard edge on the front part of my garden. I thought it was too bad I didn’t build the pathways from that cardboard. It does seem to be discouraging the quack grass from growing so it’s staying where it is.

Witchy glowered at me from her place in the garden. Her beady eyes glared at me from behind the old glasses tied into her mop string hair. Since she does not actually possess a face, I thought the wooden beads tied onto her mop strings would help present a more realistic impression of a face. I could have painted eyes on the glass in the glasses and had a better imitation of eyes. I hope the rustling of her garbage bag dress doesn’t scare the birds from the birdbath at the opposite end of the garden.

Let me get back to my original subject, which was the lack of plant life showing in my garden. It seems that socking the water to the garden was the thing to do. I could see little strands of carrots poking through the water-softened crust. The radishes I threw in with the carrots seemed to be growing as I watched. Judging from the size of the radishes I think it won’t be long until I can eat a few.

A huge clap of thunder that scared me from my easy chair last evening seemed also to have scared most of my incipient plants from the soil. Once the garden dries I will finally be able to go and weed it and not be afraid I am eliminating a row of just barely germinated vegetables.

FOLK MARKS by M.L. Hannah

A Sign of The Times

Our city council is planning to do something about the unattractive temporary signs that sprout like thistles along our major thoroughfares. Well, I wonder if those signs are really all that ugly. After all, aren’t some of the permanent signs somewhat ugly, too?

I prefer signs like the wonderful metal banners that grace lampposts along 10^th Street. They are eye catching and also representative of the activities that take place in our community. If commercial signs were pictographs would we understand what the signs mean? I suspect we would but would we know that bagels are fifty cents a dozen with a purchase of fifty dollars worth of groceries? Likely not. Or would we know we could get a tire change free if we bought thirty dollars worth of gasoline? How would we find the store with the best specials when we are driving by? I think roadside advertising is a sign of the times in an automobile society.

It doesn’t take too much looking around to notice the difference between signs. There are those that are scribbles in a window and those that scream in neon colours and those that rest the eye because someone took a little extra time to make them look attractive. Which one draws the most customers? After all, isn’t the purpose of signage to advertise one’s wares? I appreciate the business that takes the extra effort to present itself attractively but do I show my appreciation by shopping there? I confess I often shop at a location when I see a temporary sign that tells me they have something I want.

Do consumers shop locally if they see the great price reduction in bagels? Or do they drive to another community to shop? I think any merchant who doesn’t do something to get customers into buy will soon be gone from sight and we will have even more empty windows. I personally would rather see slummy signs, blaring For Sale messages lined up along the road, or hanging in windows of viable businesses than see nothing at all.

Driving to another community to shop is also a sign of the times and possibly the biggest reason for the proliferation of temporary commercial signage. Maybe the shopper will see a bargain and slow down and shop locally instead of driving to a larger centre. Like real estate For Sale signs that hang around, for months at a time, commercial outlets are simply trying to get a share of the shrinking consumer dollar, which is another sign of the times.

Just about anything looks better with a frame around it. I wonder if temporary signs would be so offensive to the discriminating eye if they had beautiful frames and a few curves?

Will our descendants look back fondly on our signs? Should we take care to preserve a few? It’s a sign of almost every era that yesterday’s junk is today’s antique.

I always enjoy the nicely decorated sidewalk signs outside establishments and if they have a window with a tastefully done list of prices in it I even stop to read it, sometimes. We could use a little more of that around here but most of the year we are driving, not walking, so we need big signs.

If we want good-looking signs maybe we could encourage them by shopping at businesses that decorate their storefronts in a beautiful way.

I saw a clever sign outside an establishment that sells art. A colourful statue, bolted to the wall near the entrance, draws the eye. I think the statue is much more attractive than a gigantic temporary sign that talks about prices. But those temporary signs do have an impact on shopper behaviour.

The brightly coloured statue gets my attention, like the special on the temporary signs gets my attention. Every community has to deal with the same issues. How do we let people know what we are selling if we are merchants and how do we find what we need if we are consumers? I think the temporary signs are going to migrate to the walls of the building and the same conspicuous colours will blast out the prices. It’s a sign of the times.