Earlier on this week, I was speaking to my boyfriend on the phone and during the course of the conversation I happened to mention that I was a little bit annoyed with a friend of mine who hadn't turned up to an exhibition which my work was showing at. This friend, lets call her Tamia, was supposed to meet up with two other friends of mine and they were all supposed to come down for the show. Now I had received a call from one of the other girls (Jacqui) saying that she had spoken to Tamia and Tamia had said she didn't receive my invite, my reply had been ' so what! '  As far as I was concerned, as long as she knew what was happening (which she did) she didn't need an invite (which I did send).

Anyway 7.30pm came and of course as I had suspected only Jacqui & Amber turned up, and when I asked where Tamia was they said they had called her when they both got to the meeting spot and she'd told them that she was tired!!

So I took it upon myself to give her a day or two call me to explain or apologise, but she didn't. I then called her and she told me that her phone hadn't been working and she couldn't call out and blah, blah, blah. In the end we made rather vague arrangements to meet up sometime next week.

Now my BF couldn't for the life of him understand why I was so upset and he made a comment that went something like "you women make your lives so complicated, she couldn't make it, so what, it's no big deal, guys never stress over things like that!"

After getting off the phone I was forced to think about what he had just said not because I felt it was true but because I was convinced it wasn't. But as I started to prove to myself how uncomplicated my life was I found myself clutching at thin air.

From the moment I wake up I complicate my life with my body wash (Bath & Body Works, Eucalyptus aromatherapy ) Face cleanser (Lancôme), Face Cream (Lancôme) Body lotion (Bath & Body Works, Eucalyptus aromatherapy) Foot cream (Bath & Body Works, again) Perfume ( from a selection depending on mood).  Choosing what to wear can take anywhere from five seconds to one hour (I have been known to take two on occasion). All that before I've left my front door! But I guess most of you women are thinking " That's normal". Maybe, the only thing I'm sure of is that I've seen my BF spend 20mins from shower to car door when we're going out and he looks gorgeous to me.  What I really think is that as women, we love complication, we revel in it, it makes life for us stimulating and if not that, it at least makes phone conversation to our girlfriend interesting and extremely... juicy. Complication is a bit like double chocolate cake with a centre layer of whipped cream and sliced strawberries, topped with hazelnuts smothered in Swiss white chocolate. How on earth do you say NO! To that or try to stay in the kitchen when its waiting for you in the fridge?????? I’m not going to mention the complications at work, after all they don’t pay us that salary so that our working lives will be as simple and painless as possible. Most of the problems we find ourselves embroiled in as women are in our personal relationships and to be specific, our relationships with our girlfriends. How many times have you “been the bigger person” and called a friend after days of not talking only to get into another argument, or how many times have you tried to be the referee between two (or more) of your friends that weren’t speaking only to get entangled in all their mess and then you think ‘ why did I bother?’ Now I know that men don’t do that, as far as they are concerned, if it’s your problem you fix it, call me when it’s over.

Take some time out to think about all the unnecessary complicated situations you’ve gotten yourselves in during this past week, if you’re out there and you shaking your head because you don’t know what I’m talking about, give me your number because I would love to know your secret. But if you can count more than two, then maybe you can benefit from this small exercise. First, give yourself a goal like a new CD you’ve wanted for a while or a new pair of shoes with killer heels. Next, slowly go through everyday without complaining and I mean about anything and everything (this is truly a test of strength). Whilst doing this make sure you don’t get involved in anybody else’s argument. You might think this ridiculous when reading this, but try it, just for one week, believe me if you succeed, the rewards of one stressless week, one uncomplicated chapter of your normal life, will definitely amaze you!!!

Until next time,

A Friend