Again at a sitting at Levi Cowperthwaite's as we sat in the quiet for some time, I did not feel we were all clear. Dear Levi spoke out, saying: Cyrus feels a burden and he hoped whoever is holding back would give up. Soon dear Harry bowed in supplication, the first in public that I know.
Some time later, as Harry Moore and I were visiting meetings and families in New Jersey, from Bucks Quarter in the north to Haddonfield in the south, we went to dear John Ballenger's, who was truly a father in Israel, arriving there the second day, where we spent the night. I felt much exercise regarding this neighborhood, expecting we would visit the families as in other meetings; a service much in the cross. As I weighed the matter by morning I was not able to see the way open, rather surprised, but it settled on my mind very strongly to propose an appointed meeting especially for the young people on fourth-day evening at half past seven o'clock. On mentioning this, we found there was a confliction in the arrangement for Canby Balderston was to come and entertain the young people with his magic lantern. This seemed a serious matter, mostly as a trial of faith for us and those whom we were visiting. We consulted with some of the "inward spiritual" elders, and end endeavored to weigh the matter very seriously, particularly in my own mind, as I had felt it so clearly. Fourth-day being the regular meeting there, we attended, and on arriving at the meeting house dear Charles Rhoads asked me how I felt. I told him it had been a trial of my faith, that I was unable to see any other time, and was willing to give it up. Then he said, If that is the way thee feel I will give notice at the close of the meeting.
After the meeting we went to dear Levi Cowperthwaite's, and now I felt the burden very heavily upon me. In the afternoon, when dear William C. Cowperthwaite, who was preparing the lights for the meeting, told me that the young people had telegraphed to C. Balderston not to come, and I felt the burden the more. What if it proved a failure and the cause of Truth was hurt? But the step had been taken and now we would not look back. At supper I felt to bow in intercession imploring help, that the Great Name would not let His cause be evil spoken of. Dear Levi said that was a right preparation, and a very good condition to be in. At the appointed time the meeting gathered in one end of the house, quite full, and settled into a solemn silence. Several spoke briefly, and after a time I felt to appeal to the younger people, to put themselves in my place, having felt required, in the cross, to propose the meeting. Also because of the confliction, and their giving up for this, and now knowing as little as what it was for as they, I desired their sympathy, and I was thus led little by little to my admiration, until I felt relieved of the concern. Prayer was offered under a solemn covering and the meeting closed. Charles Rhoads came to me in consolation and said he had no idea that so many of the young people would come. Others expressed likewise. Now that this was over, and we were through there, I said to Harry and Henry Leeds, though it is late we will go right to Moorestown. So we drove away ere we hurt the oil or the wine in any, and arrived at Henry's mother's home, three happy comrades.