Okay, so you're looking for a guy and you're checking if Rusty is the man. (Why else would you be reading this? Otherwise get outta here, pronto!)
Bad news: Your search is almost hopeless.
Good news: I can help.
First off, let's list a few assumptions, since this is going to be done
methodically and scientifically:
So far, so good. Now, let's look at
the population of
Congratulations! There are 1,223,400 potential significant-others here in the
fine city of
Cool! I've just about tripled your resource pool, and you
didn't even have to do anything.
But wait.
I only listed the number of people here in
Well, I giveth and I taketh away. Looks like less than half of that 3 million people are gonna fit the bill. We're still left with more than a million (1,450,423) males, so don't worry about it too much. But you're only interested in guys that are 25-44 years of age. I figured this because it's a nice big range, for your benefit, and because the supporting data happen to be arranged nicely. So, these are your target men:
And it's going to cost you. Next slide, please:
Thirty-four tiny little percent! We're now down to 493,143.94 males, which I'll
round up to 493,144. Trust me -- you really don't want a 94/100ths of a dude.
Now, these guys are old enough -- they should have done something interesting
with themselves, right? And that's probably gonna
take some motivation, and more than a little bit of smarts. Let's be arbitrary
and decide that you want a college graduate. 25 years
old and only a GED to show for it? That's not your ideal man. And since
he's making big bucks with that shiny diploma, he'd better have his own place.
That's not too much to ask for, right? Otherwise he'd be blowing it on stuff
like strippers and coke. Okay, a mortgage payment it is. Let's go to the factbook for the numbers:
The sobering reality is that, in
I almost forgot. I suppose you don't want your man to already have a wife, eh?
How 'bout kids? (To those who didn't answer in the negative, you're shameless. Ya got spunk, but stop reading now -- there are plenty of
married men who are willing to answer the call. Now beat it.) Here we go:
Twenty nine thousand, six hundred seventy two (29,672) unmarried,
college-educated, home-owning, 25-44 year-old San Diegan males left. Sad. So very, very sad. Okay, let's
wrap up by mixing in just a few more common attributes that you women look for
in a man, the ones that do not facilitate numerical analysis:
After using my SAS, Perl, SQL and Unix tools and running a triple-regression, complex plane interleave
function (with a modified vector space, of course!), I am happy to provide you
with the results of my non-numerical analysis. Given 29,672
Before you say anything, such as:
Shhh...quiet
time, now. I've only got one more chart to show you, and when you look at it,
you should realize how lucky you are to have found me. Ready?
And all you have to do is email me. I know, I know -- it's like you won the
damn lottery or something.
Signed,
A twenty-something, home-owning, degree-having, romantic, intelligent, single,
unmarried, goodlooking, 5'10"/175 pound male with a large unit, gainful
employment, reliable transportation, and a wicked sense of humor...heh-heh-heh