Five>>>Big Foamy Beers
Jedidiah and I are strolling around the mall. It feels so juvenile but what else is there to do in Tulsa. Aside from racing your fathers tractor with your buddies and using paint guns to shoot empty soda cans, the mall is one of the only forms of entertainment.
“Jedidiah. Why aren’t we out drinking? At Crow Creek Tavern sitting around with big foamy beers?” I look at him. I really do want an answer.
“I’m only 20 Tay.”
Oh yeah.
“So why haven’t we gotten you a fake ID? So we can go to Crow Creek Tavern and sit around with big foamy beers?”
“I don’t know man.”
Oh. Now I understand….
Jedidiah walks into a department store and I follow him in. We’re walking by the quilt and comforter section of the store. I spot a comfortable looking bed and start running towards it. With a wild jump I land on the…oh fuck! It’s not a real mattress! Jedidiah is having a fit in the middle of the isle, practically on the floor in laughter.
“Oh my god, dude. That’s just a wooden box you know!”
No really?!
I get up and rub my back, lifting up my shirt and trying to see my back but failing miserably. Damn mom and dad for not giving me more flexible genes. Jed is still recovering from his laughing fit. He leans against me and pats my shoulder.
“That made my day Tay.”
I start to roll my eyes but crack up myself. Before I know it, I’m squatting over hugging my stomach practically in tears from laughing so hard.
Later that night I am in a darkened restaurant, looking into his eyes across the table. Is it just me or does this sound like a date to you? But I’m telling Jedidiah a stupid story from growing up.
“So then Zac was mad at me because I threw the candle at him, which barely even hurt by the way, so he finds this stuffed squirrel I had and uses a red marker to draw all over the squirrel. Then he uses something sharp to cut open the squirrel’s neck. He wrote a note saying he committed suicide because his owner, me, is such a douche- but I don’t think he used that word. I forget what he said.”
Jed laughs. “Wait, was this a lit candle!?”
“What!? No! What kind of sick fuck do you think I am? It was just a really heavy candle mom set out of Christmas.”
Our waitress greets us with a friendly smile and a “How are you doing?” Well in the perfect world, she would be cute and fresh. But she isn’t. She’s got to be at least 45 years old. Maybe even Mom’s age.
While Jed is ordering I take a minute to think to myself- something I do probably too much. Maybe life is going to be okay. Maybe I am not as pathetic as I think. I do have friends. I have my pottery class as a hobby. I have my music. I don’t need a girl. Sure, life seems pathetic sometimes. But it’s not always supposed to be fun. Everyone’s life has downs, as well as ups. I sit up straighter in my seat. Life is going to be fine. I am tempted to break out singing, “Tomorrow” from my favorite movie growing up, “Annie” but I resist and just smile politely at the waitress.