inside or out?
I remember as a kid... on weekends we'd be OUT playin' - the gang... and i'd have to go INSIDE for something - usually nothing at all important. My Dad would be at his post - the kitchen table - grading papers (usually essays) and i'd go stompin' on IN and then OUT... and IN and then OUT again..... usually, my Mom was trying to tak a nap - which i can totally appreciate now! My Dad would always holler out... INSIDE or OUT - make up your mind! hmmm. Seems that i'm still having problems makin' up my mind!
inside or out?
I'm leaving for a few days........... going outta town! Actually, i'm going back to Rich's cabin - this time without Rich. I just need a break. I've been flipping around with this "sick - issue" for too long. I want to get OUTSIDE of myself for a while.... or maybe INSIDE..... hum.
inside or out?
Today in psychotherapy (just the name of that group causes chills) i talked about being raped when i was 18. I didn't want to go there and have thought that perhaps i would be able to stay OUT of there (the memories).... ah but, Judith has her lovely ways of backdooring you into talking about things before you realize you are IN there.... Was it painful to talk about? *shrug* i don't know, evidently i was quite OUTSIDE myself when i was talking about it in group because i didn't cry.... i didn't even think it was a big deal.... Then, after class i went into Jonathon's office and bawled my head off...... must have jumped back IN for a bit.
inside or out?
I talked to Jonathon today - we had a little therapy session - after my crying session. He asked what goals i'm trying to achieve this time around in group..... ordinarily i would have known that but lately i've been very numb to everything. So much so that i don't usually have much to write - in case you were wondering if i was ever going to get to the point - errrrr.
inside or out?
oh well, hopefully i'll be OUTSIDE quite a bit this weekend at the cabin..... i want to rake leaves... burn leaves... smell leaves............. shit, just be OUT - IN the leaves..... maybe when i get back i can talk to Jon about goals........... or something like that.
inside or out?
hmmm. As much as I love ya Dad... i'm glad you won't be there this weekend... I have a feeling i'll be IN and OUT quite a bit!
kisses for all of you............... jami