DISCLAIMER:I do not own, or have anything to do with Orlando Bloom, Elijah Wood, or anyone/anything associated with them. I also do not own Matchbox Twenty. Somara, Raina, and their parents belong to me.
*summary: Uses the song "Bright Lights" by Matchbox 20. When tragedy strikes down an acting prodigy by the name of Raina Johnson, can her sister, Somara - along with Orlando's help - pull everything back together in time to save the film Raina was working on...and herself?
FIVE
...but if the bright lights don't receive you
you should turn yourself around
and come on home...
It rained the day Raina died, and on the day of her funeral. Orlando and Elijah had stood with me as the machines were unhooked, and the ventilator turned off. I stared unblinking at the paling form of my sister, and I caught myself believing that she was only asleep. I could feel Orlando's eyes turn toward me, and then his hand wrap gently around my elbow to pull me away from the body that had been my sister.
The tears finally freed themselves from my eyes as I jerked my arm away from Orlando with a little bit more force than intended and collapsed in the chair to my right, next to Raina's hospital bed. My head fell into my hands and I cried all of the tears that I could muster up.
What had I done that was so terrible to deserve such a fate? Was I really such a bad person that my sister had to be stolen from me? These thoughts, among others, trekked through my head as I cried my tears. I cried until the nurses came into the room to take her away when she had become pale and far beyond gone...when she was a specter of what she used to be. I grabbed the bedrail as one such male nurse began to wheel the gurney away.
"Miss...she has to go to the coroner's office..."
I looked up at him slowly from their place on the ground, tears filling my eyes anew, my nose and cheeks pink. I blinked swollen eyes. "Just a minute? Please?"
He looked from me, to Raina, then back to me, and sighed. "All right. I'll give you five minutes." The nurse gave me a sympathetic smile, and laid a gentle hand on my shoulder before leaving me alone with Raina.
A whispered 'thank you' was all I could give him; a smile was just too much to manage. My eyes flickered up to Raina's face, pale and drawn, and I felt more tears well up at the sight of the weak body that had housed such a vibrant soul.
"Ray...I know you can't hear me now, but there's something you have to know," I looked around the tiny ICU room, and saw that I was alone. The nearest person was on the other side of the curtain behind me. Probably Orli. I took a deep breath, and began to speak to my sister. "I know you knew this, but for the longest time, I did hate you...because I was a jealous, cold-hearted, bitch." I wiped the tears from my eyes before going on. "I dreaded coming home and seeing you because I thought that you were coming home to gloat. I never once thought that you were going to drop something like this on me. Not once...Raina, I want you to know that I love you. If I could pick my angel, I would want her to be you. You are everything that I have ever wanted to be, and I promise to do my damnedest to fill your shoes. Raina, I will never be as good as you at anything, but with your help...just maybe I can fix things. Be my guide, Raina. I need it now. I've got a hole in me now without you, and I don't know what to do," I sighed.
"Elijah loves you, you know. I don't know if you knew, but he spent every spare moment with you. You know, I think he only left you when the doctors made him. They really had to enforce the visiting hours on us," I had to laugh despite my tears. "We definitely made them earn their money, didn't we Raina?"
I looked over the body of my sister once more, and smiled sadly. "I guess this is really it. No more parties, no more shopping," I stood up. "Our time is up. I can't tell you how much I wish it wasn't, there's still so much I want to do with you."
"Somara?" Orli's voice floated to my ears. He spoke softly, and the tone in his voice made me want to cry even more.
"Just a minute, Orli," I called back to him quietly.
"You mind if I join you for a moment?" I turned back to see Orli's head poking through the curtain, a hopeful grin on his face. I couldn't help but smile at him.
"Come on, Orli," I spoke quietly, and Orlando gently pushed the beige curtain out of his way to step into the room. He came up behind me, and wrapped his arms around my waist. I felt his breath on the nape of my neck, and then a feather-light kiss. His arms pulled tighter around me, and I fell back against him. My eyes closed, and I breathed in his scent.
Orlando held me, and rocked me slightly as he placed kisses along my collarbone and up my neck. "You know, Raina never stopped talking about you." I opened my eyes and tried to pull away from him. "Wait, Somara, please, just listen." Orlando let me go and pulled a folded envelope from his pocket. He looked down at the envelope, and my eyes followed his.
The envelope was well-worn and dog-eared on all four corners. Orli tapped it against his palm, and then looked up to me. "Raina...wrote this about six months ago, just after she'd come home and patched things up with you. She told me to give it to you...after..." Orlando grew silent, and let his eyes fall back to the crumpled envelope. I stared at him for a moment, picking his words apart inside my head. I watched as he tried his best to uncrease the envelope, but only suceeded in making it even more limp. Orlando gave up and held the envelope out to me. I just looked at it for a moment. 'Somara' was scrawled across the front in Raina's flowing handwriting. I sighed, and slowly pulled the envelope from Orlando's fingertips. His hands delved into his pockets nervously as soon as it was out of his hand, and he rocked back and forth from his toes to his heels as I turned the envelope over in my hands. I traced the lip of the envelope with my index finger, and then opened it slowly, taking care not to tear the sealed envelope more than necessary. From the envelope, I pulled a single sheet of notebook paper, creased three-fold. I unfolded the paper, and Raina's handwriting greeted my eyes.
'Hi there, Sis. I know you never wanted me to talk about my end, so I had to write it down. Somara, I'm leaving everything to you: my flat I just bought in LA (which is right next door to Orlando's. *thought you might like that*), my Tahoe, and a large sum of the money I made. Some of it, I am setting away for funeral expenses (make sure it is spent wisely, all right?), and the remaining sum for Mom and Dad.
Somara, I know you wanted me to make it, and I know that you would have given up everything you had to help me accomplish it, and you did try your hardest. Do NOT blame yourself for ANY REASON. I love you, Somara. And don't worry, love. I'll be your angel.
On a happier note, I just keep forgetting to tell you that I met Elijah! You know I've been waiting for that to happen forever! I think we hit it off well, Somara, I really do. I hope he's into me. Keep your fingers crossed, eh? ((smile))
I'm getting tired, so I'm going to rest now. This letter will reach you when the right time comes, don't fret. Oh, and I need you to do something for me. It's a delicate task. Orlando knows. Ask him. I love you, Somara.
Goodbye, Somara. Do not fear, for I will always be with you.
Forever your angel --
Raina Johnson'
A star was placed under Raina's name; it was her signature autograph. I wiped the tears from my eyes and lifted my head to see the nurse poke his head back through the curtain.
"Miss?"
I nodded, and bent over Raina's figure to press a kiss to her cold forehead. The temperature caught me off guard, and only helped to affirm that my sister was no longer a part of this world. "Goodbye, Raina," I whispered as her gurney was rolled away, and another empty one was brought in to take its place. I looked up to Orlando, who extended his hand to me. "Come, love. We still have talking to do."
I nodded, and allowed Orlando to lead me to the hospital chapel, which was right outside the ICU. I paused for a moment at the door, and looked around at the interior of the room. I hadn't gone anywhere near a church in all of seven years, and with Raina's illness I had found myself forsaking all religion.
"It's all right, love. It won't bite. Besides, it's probably the best place for you and I to talk." I nodded to Orlando, and walked through the doorframe, which was adorned with stained glass of many colors. The chapel was empty, thankfully, and Orlando led me to one of the back corners of the tiny room, as far away from the altar as he possibly could. "Somara, Raina told me to ask you to do something for her...I know she told you about the movie we were working on. It's only an Indie film, but Raina loved it. When she found out...about her illness, she made arrangements to have you take her place when the time came..."
"Whoa. Whoa, there. Me take Raina's place? Orli.....I can't do that...."
"Yes you can, love. You have it in you, Raina believed in you, and I believe in you." Orlando lifted my hand and placed a kiss to it. "You can do anything, Somara. Anything."
*
Two weeks passed before Raina's funeral came about. It was the perfect day for a funeral: grey skies, ominous looking clouds, and intermittent drops of rain falling upon the tent and the guests. It was a beautiful ceremony, and Orli was by my side the entire time. He held my hand in his, and occasionally lifted it to his lips. Nothing about the day registered, until we all rose to say our goodbyes. The line was long, and I held back to ensure that I was the last to see her. In my hand I held three roses: one white, one yellow, and one red. I set them upon her chest, under her clasped hands, and pressed a kiss from my fingertips to the bridge of her nose.
Orlando stood behind me, and he placed a white rose upon the three that I had placed inside the coffin. "Namarie, mellonim," he spoke quietly, and I smiled sadly.
"Yes. Namarie, mellonim," I paused for a moment, and Orlando gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze. "I'll do it, Raina. I'll finish the movie." I sighed. I had no clue what I was getting myself into, but for Raina, I would certainly do it.
We strayed to the reception, where everyone there was dreadfully silent. I longed for loud laughter, and even the rolling of thunder. It was stormy outside, and I begged for the rain to pour and wash away my tears. The Gods seemed to hear my pleas, and a deafening clap of thunder rang out, causing all of the guests to jump out of either fear or shock. I smiled inwardly.
Risking that the other guests would be all right by themselves, I snuck out onto the funeral home's patio. It was beautiful. It extended a good five feet from the building, and was enclosed by a rustic looking rail, fashioned from brand new, weatherproof wood. Cedar, perhaps. Rain fell from the awning of the building, and I leaned upon the wooden railing, splinters digging into my palms as I let the falling rain splash upon my face and wash away what little makeup I had chosen to wear. The pain that the shards of wood induced was welcomed; it reminded me that I was still alive. I shoved myself away from the cooling rain, and took up residence upon one of the patio chairs. It was wet, but I found that I didn't care.
I don't know how long I had been out on the patio, staring unblinking into the falling rain, staring into the grey skies that echoed my mood, but it was long enough that everything around me had gotten drenched, including myself. My hair was barely damp, but the skirt of my dress was a wreck. I looked down at it as I heard the front door behind me squeak open.
"Somara?" Orlando's voice was timid, as if he was afraid to interrupt my silent vigil.
"It's odd, isn't it? The way I used to fear the storms?" As I spoke, a hideous clap of thunder rolled, and I blinked in reaction. "Now I'm just sitting here, welcoming them, praying for them to never go away. Like I prayed for my sister to never leave me time and again." A tear slipped down my cheek, and I heard Orlando's footfalls.
"It's not odd, love," he replied, and reached out to stroke my face. I turned away, but I could still see the hurt in his eyes, and feel it radiate from his being. "Somara..."
"You're too good to me, Orli. Too good for me," I hung my head.
"What are you sayin', love?" Orli pulled up a dry chair, and took a seat next to me, looking at me as if I were insane.
"I always thought love was a joke, Orli," I looked up at him. "Until I met you. You changed my whole world, in one swoop, and I was sucked under the tide. I feel.....like I'm drowning here, Orli. I feel like I have to get away..."
"Love, I can take you away. We could go back to my home in England. You could rest, and get better...anything would be better for you than here."
"No, Orli. Nothing would be better than here. She's always with me. In pictures in my apartment, on my mind. I see her when I sleep, and even sometimes when I'm wide awake. I can't get her off of my mind, Orli. It's like...she's haunting me," I turned spooked eyes onto him, and he stiffened.
"Somara...I...don't know what to say. Why haven't you said anything?" His eyes looked as if I had scared him terribly.
I looked back out to the rain as if nothing else in the world mattered. "Because people would think I'm crazy."
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