It's been an odd trip back, to say the very least. Justin's in a /state/. This may be the most upset that anyone has seen him and lived to tell about it. He's lead the way back to Tzen at a pace Razz can easily match, but he's clearly restraining himself for her sake expressly. Not until they reach the command quarters does he let up, though. Once there, he sags against the wall and watches Razz rather as though he feared she were going to hurt him.

Razz never quite raised her head throughout the entire journey back. Then again, it wasn't as if she's had a need to. She followed Justin quitely, her head lowered like a child at fault. Her dark hair fell around her face, forming a curtain that obscured her expression. Silently, she sat down on a chair besides the bed, and... doesn't know quite what to think. Lexi is indeed alive. What does that make her? That is.... sigh. So... what happens now?

Justin seems, quite obviously, to be wondering the same thing, and to be looking to her for the answer. "...what's going to happen? Why did she run? What am I going to--" He straightens, suddenly. "I've got to find her. Got to. I'll have to--" He watches Razz looking abject, and sags again. ".../gods/...I'm sorry."

Razz closed her eyes, and drew up her knees, wrapping her arms around them. She - doesn't want to do this anymore. She doesn't want to have people look at her like she's the most miserable thing that's ever happened. Ever since the force in her manifested itself, ever since then, people have looked at her as if she's the most pitiful thing to be born. It worsened as she became blind, was raped, and became pregnant. Some people whispered harsh things behind her back, others pitied her. Yet they never bothered her too much... for Justin was always there to assure her. Yet, now, he himself is pitying her. Not even when she became blind or pregnant, has he ever looked at her like this. Aaah... it hurts... if only she didn't love him... Shame, she doesn't have a right to love him. He loves Lexi, to whom he's married... They have to find her, they do. "We have to find her..." Razz nodded, set her feet down on the floor, and stood up.

Justin considers this. They have to find her. But... Well, finding /them/ was what made her run off. It's got to be explained. But, the important thing is not to lose her again. But... going out with Razz again isn't likely to make her any more comfortable. And it's not quite like she'd be much help. So, at length... "...I have to go find her."

Razz fails to understand, and nods, and starts to walk towards the door.

Justin bars the door with his arm, frowning faintly. Inwardly, of course, he's rather tearing himself up, but a faint frown is all anyone /sees/. "No...I'm sorry. I have to look for her. You should stay here."

Razz freezes, and takes several steps back. Horror at what she had done gripped her, and she lowers her head again, stiff, wishing she could've gone back and just /sat/. The faint disapproval she sensed, as traumatizing as a slap in the face. "I'm sorry," she said quickly.

No, no, wrong, wrong, Justin berates himself. He's going to have to hope he it can all be sorted out once he's got both of them in the same room. For a moment a feeling of utter self-loathing wells up, but he crushes it ruthlessly. "I'm sorry. It might be a while."

"Aah," Razz murmured quietly, still very much frozen in place, hoping that it'll keep her from doing anything else wrong... What would he tell her, though, if Lexi asks who she is? A silly little girl who /loves/ him? ... No, she can't love Justin. Justin's married, after all. What right does she have to love him? She can't stand more.... pitying... as it is....

He'll tell her to wait until she gets back with him and she can hear it from her directly, will Justin, but it's doubtful that Razz'd believe that if she were told. It's not...pity, really, but guilt. And clearly he's got /something/ to feel guilty about. But, but, he /wasn't/ leading Razz on, is the thing, the real crux of the matter. It could turn out that it's too late for Lexi. It could turn out that it's not, though. He could fall off a cliff and die while he's out trying to look for her. They could all three of them get hung on Crulath's next tree.

...he's losing it right now, can you tell? But, but, he's got to remind himself, it'll all work out better if he can get them all together to talk. He's got to do it. Now. Before Razz looking at him like that puts him over the edge. Muttering something wholly inarticulate, he attempts to find his way around the doorframe and out.

Guilt, she could feel it. Guilt, and it's not her own. Justin feels guilty. Doesn't he always? She knows, how when something bad happens, Justin would blame himself, when he really didn't do anything wrong. He blames himself for not being able to fix it... Razz knows, though she might not have been able to put it into words. Yet again, what Justin is feeling guilty for isn't his fault... she's almost always the one that starts it... He feels guilt, because he knows that she loves her, but he couldn't return her affections. If she didn't love him... no one would have to suffer, right now. At least, Justin wouldn't have to blame himself for her actions, again. "Justin," Razz starts to call out, hesitating. "A-ah, I, I... I have been... thinking... and... and... I... I realize that... I..." Keep on going, just keep on going. It's the least you can do, Razz told herself silently in her mind. Now if only her voice will stop shaking. "I was... wrong. I- I thought... about me liking you... I thought it was love... but now I think I was mistaken... I only... like you... like how you like me... not like you and Lexi.... I didn't... love... you..." her voice nearly died down to a whisper at the end of that sentence. "So, you don't have to worry about me, I'm sorry." Her hands, hidden inside the overly long sleeves of her robe, are clenched white. Her nails pierced the skin of her palm, but she is numb to the pain. "I'm sorry," she said again, her face hidden almost completely behind the curtain that is her hair.

Justin can't deal with this, he can't, he can't, not now, possibly not ever, this is too much to throw at one man in one day, make it stop, please.

Razz stands as still as before, a fierce trembling threatened to overwhelm her, but she stood as frozen as ice. She just stood, and her eyes are closed, and her head is down, and she is still. Movement right now cannot be trusted.

Barely able to think, now, already tying himself in knots, he shakes his head emphatically, and all but bolts from the room and out.

Seconds passed like days, minutes like weeks. Be still, she told herself, be still. Even as she could no longer feel Justin's presence, even as her joints unlocked and shook, and she fell to her knees. A trembling hand reached up to grasp tightly at her heart, and a silent, choking wail of excruciating pain escaped her throat. It.... hurts.... so.... much.... Never has she ever hurted like this before... never.... ever... ever... Not when the force fried her eyesights... Not when Crulath violated her... Not... any... time.... has she ever felt pain like she did now... It is... a hopeless pain.... hopeless... And she broke into a silent, but no less hysterical, wail. Slowly, her hand shifted from her heart, and stole up to her forehead.... Where Justin had kissed her... once... And she remembers the first time he held her... the first time /anyone/ held her... and the times when he would place a hand on her shoulder... take her hand... There were times when he would tighten his hold on her as if she was something precious...

Someone... make it stop... make it all stop...

Justin parallels the road, about a quarter mile into the wilds. He moves with utter silence and complete watchfulness. Really, however, he rather doubts he's going to find her. Mirai's out searching, too, and she's a good deal more efficient at this sort of thing. Still, he has to look. He'll leave the direct work to Mirai, and for his own part try to anticipate her path of escape.

A sound clamours on the horizon. Not of loud, boisterous chatter, but of hundreds of footsteps trooping in unison, of jostling metal armours. Soon, there were heads, then shoulders, then the entire body rising into view, closing in at a steady speed. It is an army suited to strike.

He's got reflexes and instincts for this sort of thing, he has. Before he's even registering consciously that hey, wow, here comes an invasion force, he's hiding thoroughly. Sheeeeeeeeeit, where the hell did they come from? He strains to get a look at their banners... Knights of Armaggedon? And they're marching... on Tzen? That's the only thing in that direction. Shit shit shit shit shit. Even for Justin, and even in his current state, the lives of a whole city take precedence over his emotional wellbeing. He makes off for Tzen with all haste.

However he might hurry, Justin would miss the initial clash between the Knights of Armaggedon and the Freedom Blades. What Justin had came across is merely a fraction of the entire army, other portions of the invading force had already reached Tzen, and the Freedom Blades' compound is already stacking up to defend themselves against the invaders, once they reach it.

Razz had been kneeling beside her bed, exhausted by her outburst, when a Blade came in and removed her from the room. She was informed of the situation at hand, and, aware that Razz's current condition does not allow her to battle, the Freedom Blades placed her with the medics, the only place where she could help and stay relatively safe at the same time.

The Knights are a well-trained lot, and they know how to concentrate on a task at hand. This column barely noticed the extra man marching with them, even as it trudged through the devastation that had been Tzen and drew up before the Freedom Blade compound.

Justin did not break ranks here, fearful of alerting some interest. He waits without motion, without emotion, until the order is given to advance, and hopes inwardly that the Blades aren't going to try to put theirs in him.

The Blades held up valiantly against the Knights, yet the compound was not the kind of military structure to be defended against an invading force. Choas ensued as the Knights broke down the Blades' initial defenses and started taking over the compound with their every step, fighting and killing the Blades who are resisting them at every turn.

More medics are taking on the jobs of defenders, and Razz found her work load to be piling on. Powerful healing spells she does not lack, and for the first time, she actually feels as if she might be doing some good. The sound of fighting are getting closer, though... It's not improbable that the remaining medics will soon have to fight for their own lives...

In all the carnage, then, you can hardly blame them all for not noticing that one of the Knights seems not to be doing nearly as much fighting and killing as the others. In fact, ducking into an abandoned training hall and shedding a borrowed helmet and sword, the man that emerges is clearly no Knight at all.

Availing himself of skills no honorable warrior ought to possess, he sneaks and skulks his way inward, to the...emtpy...command quarters. Gods, she hasn't been taken already, has she? No, no, /think/ you idiot, she's a healer. Wherever they're keeping the medics is where she'll be.

He finds it a lot harder to travel now, though. Seems he wasn't that well-liked, or at least not that well-known, and some of the Blades have been putting two and two together. After the fourth cry of 'Spy!' or 'Traitor!', he's really getting frantic. He's got both sides coming after him, now. Too fast to dodge, and too many to just ignore.

Razz is entirely unaware of the troubles that Justin is going through right at that moment. The groans and cries of the injured and dying has a way of getting your full attention into trying to make them stop. Eventually, someone came up to her, and tapped her on the shoulder. "I realize that I shouldn't be asking this of a person of your condition, but-" a ragged Blade said, blood and scratchs evident on his pale face. "We need every help we can get to survive. Our sector has been blocked off and isolated, the only fighters that we can get is all here. You're a powerful healer, but how well can you fight?"

Razz's eyes widened at the man's plea, still dealing cure spells onto the injured.

A chain linked armour and a simple helmet was the best the Blades could come up with for her as they stood in the hallway leading to the entrance of the medical hall. Razz may be blind, but she could see better than anyone in the midst of the fighting and choas. A powerful shield is erected in the middle of the hall, and Razz closed her eyes out of habit, bracing herself for the impact that must follow from the attempts of breaking her shield...

Justin is the center of a particularly dense bit of fighting and chaos, as he struggles to defend himself against KoA and FB alike. He's fast, though, and powerful, and a damn sight meaner than any of the troops facing him.

The front moves along, down the hall, the very hall that Razz has just been stationed in, and it's a lucky thing Justin's paying attention, as his blade nearly finds its mark in her shield. Recognizing her, however, he switches tactics abruptly, sidesteps, takes hold of her, and all but shouts a stun spell at the rest of the combatants in the hall.

Razz was in pain. A shield, at least the sort that she's being taught, is actually an extension of herself. True, it may not inflict physical damage directly onto her physical body, but the impact of the blows dealt against the shield can still be felt by her. So concentrated she was, that Razz did not realize Justin's presence until he grabbed a hold of her arm. The power of Justin's will overpowered the combatants in the hall as they dropped down to the floor, groaning.

"Justin? What are you doing here?"

"Getting you out of here before you get hurt."

It's not open for discussion, apparently. While you'd have to be pretty harsh and a bit dishonest to call it 'manhandling', he really doesn't seem to be leaving Razz much choice about remaining behind.

Razz didn't turn her head to look back at the people they're leaving behind, seeing as how she's /blind/, it would've been a pointless gesture. Her mind did linger, however, and she worried. But over all she did not object as Justin pulled her along, as she was starting to doubt her ability to keep up... her womb had started throbbing again...

Justin is perfectly prepared to carry her the entire way to wherever they're going, but it's not really going to be necessary. Returning once again to the empty training hall, past which the conflict line has long since pushed, he comes to a stop and once again begins a complex chant.

It continues far longer than any spell he's cast in front of her before, and slowly a discontinuity appears.

Razz wondered, for though she could very well feel the difference in the spell, she still did not understand enough to know what Justin's doing. But she waits, and allows Justin to finish what he's doing. He'll tell her if she needs to know.

At length, the chanting trails off, and is replaced by the hum and crackle of a portal. Pale and pained, Justin reaches out, either to steady himself or to guide Razz towards it; it's not entirely clear.

"...You first. It'll close after me."

Razz nodded, though concern and worry grew in her mind. Justin sounds exhausted. Was he hurt? However, such questions must wait, as Razz knew it, and she walks into the portal without objections.

Justin follows as closely as he can, stumbling through the gate and nearly ending up on his face.

...

This is an empty clearing. This is not the tower of the Council of Mages. Why is this so? Muh, the explanation can wait until he's rested. The inn is... it's... /that/ way.

His turning and pointing routine probably looks pretty damn silly to Razz, but oh well. "...Come on. The Inn's up the road here."