(Stop Look Ed transcript)

(Ed is twanging a large rubber band, laughing. The scene switches to Edd, who 
is welding something in a cardboard box. He is wearing the appropriate gear. He 
lifts the visor.)

EDD: Ed, please? The vibration from the rubber band could interfere with the 
gyros of our jawbreaker surveliance satellite!

(As he speaks, we now see that he is sitting on the side of a large thing made 
mainly from cardboard boxes. It vaguely resembles a satellite. Ed is holding a 
propeller.)

ED: (loudly) I have no idea what you just said, Double Dee! (Happy) Can I wind 
it up now, please, can I, huh? Oh come on!

(Eddy pops out of the top of the satellite)

EDDY: Hang on to your neck, Orville! (happy) Double Dee, tell me again, I’m 
drooling!

EDD: Well, Eddy, with the proper atmospheric conditions, our satellite will be 
able to pinpoint (Eddy is smiling, his chin on his hands) every jawbreaker 
within a four block radius of the cul-de-sac.

EDDY: (Overjoyed) Really?

ED: Contact!

(Eddy looks surprised)

EDDY: Huh?

EDD: Oh dear.

EDDY: Ed, let go of that propeller!

(Ed is winding up the propeller, but after Eddy speaks, he lets go. It spins 
very quickly.)

ED: Roger, Eddy!

(Eddy and Edd are holding on as the satellite shakes)

EDD: Ed, no, reverse that! Grab hold of the propeller!

ED: (Saluting) In your head, Double Dee!

(Ed bites the propeller, causing it to stop. The satellite continues shaking 
slightly)

EDDY: Now what?

(The satellite spins around as quickly as the propeller did. Edd and Eddy 
scream)

EDD and EDDY: (As they are thrown off) E-ed!

(The satellite takes off)

ED: Ha. Look at it go, guys!

EDD: (Pulling himself up with Ed's vest) Oh dear, oh dear. (Sighs, then speaks 
quietly) Oh well.

(Eddy is lying on the road, with a black eye)

EDDY: (wearily) Just once, I'd like something to go right. (He is run over by 
the satellite) Ow! Hel-lo!

EDD: Lucky for us, I can track its every whereabouts. (He pulls out a device 
with a flashing red light on the bottom) Hm.

(Edd runs off. Ed follows, laughing)

EDDY: (Standing up drunkenly and lurching) Wait up! That's my waffle!

(He leaves)



(Jimmy giggles. There is a closeup on his face)

JIMMY: Your turn, Sarah.

SARAH: (Leapfroging Jimmy) Leapfrog! (laughs)

JIMMY: You're so nimble, Sarah. My turn! (Goes to leapfrog Sarah. The satellite 
picks him up, and he screams) Of all the darned luck! Space junk attaack! (He 
slides down, using his nails to unsuccessfully hang on) Darn, my perfectly 
manicured nails... 

(Jimmy falls off, screaming. The satellite sails around a corner. Edd stands 
up.)

EDD: If my calculations are correct, it should land... (Eddy and Edd wince as 
an the ground shakes. They see the satellite hanging in a tree) In that tree... 
Damaged, fractured and out of order.

(Edd starts to walk to the tree)

EDDY: Don't move, Lumpy.

(Eddy also starts walking. Ed pulls his friends back)

ED: First one there is a rotten egg!

(Ed runs, quite slowly. Edd zooms ahead of him)

EDD: No, wait! (Attempts to push Ed back) Please, Ed, send an impulse to your 
brain and stop! (They have reached the grass. Edd teeters on the edge of the 
footpath. Ed is standing on his chest) Ed, are you standing on my shirt with 
your filthy shoes?

EDDY: DOGPIIILE! (Yells)

EDD: For Pete's sake... (Eddy lands on top of Ed, causing Edd to teeter some 
more. He walks away from the grass with difficulty) We're not allowed on the 
(Falls onto his back) grass!

EDDY: Who says?

EDD: (Pointing) Please read the sign.

(The camera pans to a sign on the grass, which reads "KEEP OFF THE GRASS")

EDDY: Keep off. So what?

EDD: (Grabbing the sign, apparently still standing on the footpath) Eddy, you 
must observe and obey the sign. (Eddy looks unimpressed and Ed looks vacant) 
Signs are in place so that order is maintained in an otherwise uncultivated 
society. (Edd is now standing up, looking haughty) And I for one, oppose these 
silk screen policies.

EDDY: Don't you know adults come up with this stuff just to bug us? See? (Steps 
on the grass) I step on the grass, and nothing happens!

EDD: (Shocked) Have you no moral fibre?

EDDY: (Grabbing Edd) Be a rebel! (Throwing Edd down) Try it! (Edd is holding 
onto the sign to avoid touching the grass) It's just a dumb sign.

ED: I am smarter than a sign! (Lifts up Edd, then the grass) Look at me! (He 
burrows under the grass, laughing)

EDDY: (Jumping onto Edd's back) Go on, touch it!

EDD: (Desperate) I can't, it's not in me, Eddy. Think of the melee, and- (More 
calmly) Excuse me, has my shirt become a doormat for everyone's filthy shoes? 
Hm?!

(Under the grass, Ed is standing up. His head pops out of the top.)

ED: Boing!

EDD: Well, I suppose technically (Eddy gasps) that's not on the grass...

(A chunk of grass is thrown onto Edd and Eddy, who try to fight their way out. 
Ed falls over onto the new patch of dirt vacated by the grass. Then he does it 
again. And again.)

ED: I'm a woodpecker! (Falls over another three times) 'Cept with dirt.

(Edd and Eddy groan as they pop their heads out from the grass)

EDDY: (Rubbing his hands together) Let's find some more signs!



(A sign says "Wet cement". Kevin and Jonny groan with effort. They and a few 
others are trying to pull a basketball out of wet cement by forming a human 
chain. Jonny and Plank are on the end.)

JONNY: (Strained) Plank says he's almost got it!

(The ball disappears into the cement)

KEVIN: (Deadpan) Rats.

(They pull Jonny up)

JONNY: (Scared) That could've been us! Good thing Plank read the sign!

EDDY: (Who wasn't there before...) If someone told you to jump off the Empire 
State Building, would ya? (He is standing on another sign reading "Wet cement")

EDD: (Running up) Don't jump, Eddy, don't!

(Edd makes a grab at Eddy, who steps off the sign, into the cement)

EDDY: Hah!

EDD: (Covering his eyes, resigned) Oh, you're so stubborn...

KEVIN: What are you doin', dork?

EDDY: (smug) I'm following my own rules, Kev. If you want the ball, (Reaches 
into the cement) just get it! 

( Eddy holds up the ball. Ed surfaces, apparently he was the one that took it. 
He leaps over Eddy, taking the ball in his mouth as he does. Sarah is furious.)

SARAH: Oh, you're in big trouble, Ed!

EDDY: (Dismissive) Daah. Rules are for losers.

(Ed is making a cement angel)

ED: I'm an angel, Sarah! (laughs)

KEVIN: (Making the screw loose sign) What a couple of screwballs.

Edd: (Grabbing Kevin, desperate) Try to talk some sense into them! They're 
loose cannons ready to bloow!

KEVIN: (Menacing) I'll give you three to let go of me.

(Edd squeals and grabs Jonny instead, shaking.)

EDDY: (Procuring a giant cake) Let's have some desert before dinner and eat it 
with our hands! (Stuffs a piece of cake into his mouth. He doesn't swallow) 
Then talk with your mouth full!

ED: (Lifting his arms) Eddy's the maaan! (Laughs as he takes a larger piece of 
cake, then eats it. Sarah is still angry.)

SARAH: (pointing) Mom's gonna be so mad, Ed!

EDDY: You kids still listen to mommy and daddy? (He walks a few steps, showing 
that he now has a block of cement on each foot. He doesn't seem to notice. He 
now speaks in a slightly sing song tone of voice) Too bad. I guess you won't be 
joining us for an after dinner swim.

JONNY: You can't do that, Eddy!

EDDY: (Patting Jonny's head) We can do whatever we want, Jonny boy.

JIMMY: But you'll get a cramp.

(Eddy puts his arm round Jimmy)

EDDY: That's exactly what adults want you to think!

(Edd is not happy)

EDD: Okay. This has gone far enough!

JONNY: Can me'n Plank go to bed without brushing our teeth?

(Edd hits himself on the head and groans)

EDDY: Let'm rot, Jonny boy!

SARAH: (raising her hand) Can I stay up late?

JIMMY: (Also raising his hand) Can I wear shoulder pads?

EDDY: Knock yourself out!

(Kevin grabs Eddy)

KEVIN: (Angry) You're just tryin' to get us in trouble, aren't ya?

EDDY: (Yelling) Help help! Kevin's beating me up! (Kevin drops him) Ah!

KEVIN: Oh.

(Eddy is sitting on the ground, still with the cement blocks on his foot)

EDDY: Is the fuzz on its way? I think not. (Gets up close to Kevin) See, you 
live by the rules, just like Double Dee.(Points)

EDD: (With clasped hands) But rules are a joy to uphold!

KEVIN: Dork alert! Rules are for losers.

(Eddy sniggers. A glob of wet cement hits Kevin in the face and Eddy laughs)

ED: What'd I win?

(Kevin runs onto the cement)

KEVIN: A five finger sandwich, ya big- (Ed tickles him)

ED: (As Kevin laughs) Coochie, coochie, coochie.

KEVIN: Quit it! (Laughs)

(Wilfred, in a little cart, rolls along the footpath. Rolf, who is holding a 
giant bail of hay, follows)

ROLF: (Growls) Come, Wilfred, we have much to do!

EDDY: Hey Rolfy!

ROLF: Huh? (Looks up)

(Eddy is on top of all the hay)

EDDY: All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

(Rolf is puzzled)

ROLF: Who is this Jack? I know no Jack.

(Edd appears in front of Rolf)

EDD: Don't listen to him, Rolf! Eddy only wishes to [ofisherate] social order 
as we know it! Hm?

(Wilfred, with Ed on his back, runs past in the background)

ED: I'm onna pig! (Laughs)

EDD: Ed, you can't do that! (He runs after Ed)

(Eddy jumps off the hay)

EDDY: Take a break, will ya? Relax!

(Eddy pushes the hay out of Rolf's hands)

ROLF: Hur?

(Eddy puts his arm around Rolf's neck)

EDDY: Wouldn't you rather be sloshin' around in some wet cement?

(Rolf grabs Eddy by the hair)

ROLF: (Angry) Why do you hinder Rolf's drudgery, three haired Ed-boy? (Releases 
Eddy and speaks worridly) If my chores are not complete, I will be banished to 
the... (Shuddering) Cupboard...

EDDY: Who's gonna know? (Inviting) Come on, there's a clod with your name on 
it...

(The kids laugh as they play in the cement as though it is snow. Nazz is 
building a cement man, Kevin throws a cement ball at Jimmy and Jonny dives in. 
Rolf stares)

ROLF: Rolf is humbled by the cement. It makes him yearn for the life of leisure.

(Wilfred squeals. Ed is giving holding some hay over his nose, then pulling it 
back)

ED: Haha, what a pig.

(Eddy looks at Rolf. Rolf decides)

ROLF: Give it up for Rolf, everybody!

(Rolf runs off. Eddy grins. Edd is not impressed)

EDD: (Annoyed) Well, it seems that you've convinced all but one, Eddy, (Eddy 
glares at him) that rules need not apply in this cul-de-sac. Well, mister, I 
remain an anchored ship to those rules. Terra firma, baby.

(Ed picks up Wilfred and laughs. Eddy smirks)

EDDY: Hmm..

EDD: (Frightened) A penny for your thoughts? (Eddy slams a giant cardboard box 
over him) Not good!

EDDY: No rules rule, Double Dee!

EDD: (Faintly) Eddy...

(Eddy laughs as he pushes the box away. Wilfred oinks, now riding Ed.)



(The outside of Edd's house is seen)

EDD: (Terrified) Gah, Eddy, stop! (Eddy is rearranging Edd's bookshelf) What in 
the Sam Hill are doing? I precisely alphabetised those books for immediant 
reference!

EDDY: Alphabets are for soup! (There is a closeup on Edd's face. He is holding 
his hat tightly, and looks very upset) What's this? (Eddy is holding a book 
entitled "JOYS OF RULES") Joys of rules? Man, get a life, Double Dee.

(Eddy procures a fish)

EDD: Eddy, no! (We see that Edd's hat is tied to the ceiling lamp, seriously 
restricting his movement. He can't reach Eddy, but he's trying)

EDDY: (Squashing the fish in the book) Hah!

EDD: (Furious) Okay, that's it! I'm gonna give (Releases his hat and runs in 
place with arms outstretched) you such a thraashing! Huh?

(Edd's hat come off with a squelching noise. It is purple on the inside. There 
is a shot of Ed and Eddy's faces, though not of Edd's head. Eddy and Ed stare)

EDDY: Geez Louise.

ED: Cool.

(Edd reaches up to the light and jams his hat back on)

EDD: (Desperate) If you say one word to anyone, I-I'll never speak to you again!

(Ed walks past wearing a skull on his head. He is throwing papers from Edd's 
wastepaper basket)

ED: I am dead from the neck up. (Edd stares at him)

(Eddy jumps onto Edd's bed)

EDDY: (Removing the sheet and jumping onto the bed) I'll just save it and use 
it for ammo when I need to, Double Dee.

ED: Eddy's always a step ahead.

(Eddy lifts up a tag on Edd's mattress)

EDDY: Ooh, look at this thing. (Reads tag) "Do not remove under penalty of law".

(Eddy lowers the tag and looks at Edd, who is back to running in place)

EDD: (scared) Eddy, don't you dare remove that!

EDDY: Or what? I feel my hand slipping...

(Edd stops running)

EDD: (Squeaky) No, Eddy, you can't.

(Edd's expression mirror's Ed and Eddy's from a little while ago, as he hears 
the sound of tearing paper)

EDDY: (Waving the tag) Hah, I'm such a bad boy.

EDD: Y-you've broken me, Eddy.

EDDY: Hm?

(Edd is smiling in a deranged fashion)

EDD: Set me free, and I'll join you in destroying everything that separates us 
from the primates.

EDDY: Now we're making progress.

(Ed walks over, holding Edd's ant farm)

ED: Yum, like cheese?

EDD: No, Ed, Progress, not (He looks around and sees what Ed's holding. His 
eyes widen, and he goes crazy) proce-esss! Put them down, Ed, you leave my ants 
alone! (Screams as Ed drops the ant farm and the sand spills out)

(Edd squeezes Ed's windpipe, with his legs. Ed yells)

EDD: Five thousand, two hundred and thirty-nine, ants, Ed! (Squeezes, hurting 
Ed) Pick them up, pick them up!

ED: Ugh!

EDDY: Slow down, Double Dee.

ED: (Wheezlily, sweating) I'm sorry...



(The door to Edd's house opens. Eddy pulls Ed out. Edd is still attached to his 
neck, and Edd's hat is apparently still attached to the light.)

EDD: Where do you think you're going? (Eddy grunts) Get back in here. Five 
thousand, two hundred and thirty- (He loses his grip on Ed and is slingshotted 
back into his house. The ants leave)

(Eddy walks backwards, apparently having trouble avoiding the farm animals 
loose on the road. He sees Rolf)

EDDY: (waving) Hi, Rolf.

(A chicken crows. Ed is chasing it)

ED: Chickens! (Laughs)

EDDY: How's it goin', Stretch?

(Rolf sighs happily. He is wearing a white outfit and sunglasses and he is 
reclining on a deckchair)

ROLF: No more chores for Rolf. I am a lazy good for nothing, just like the 
others.

(Kevin is doing something with a pedal bin and some pottery. Ed runs past.)

KEVIN: (Readying his slingshot) Say goodbye to dirty dishes! (Presses the pedal 
on the bin. The dishes on top fly up and he shoots them, laughing. Nazz glugs a 
soda) Awesome, hey Nazz?

(Nazz belches. Kevin's eyes bug out. Eddy, Sarah and Jimmy step into shot and 
stare)

ROLF: Huh?

KEVIN: Good on ya.

(Nazz is covering her mouth with a finger. She stops.)

NAZZ: No rules rule. (laughs)

(Jonny is running around naked. He is holding Plank in a position that keeps 
the rating down)

JONNY: Feel the wiiind, Plaaank!

(Jonny runs past a giant icecream sundae. Sarah is at the top)

SARAH: Banana chocolate fudge!

JIMMY: (grunts as he pulls himself up) And lemon sorbet!

SARAH: Meet ya at the bottom! 

(Sarah slides down the giant icecream, chewing noisily. By the time she reaches 
the bottom, giggling, she is quite bloated. She slides along the road.)

JIMMY: Wheeee! (Joins Sarah, also bloated) I love icecream! (Sarah and Jimmy 
butt against each other) Yummy!

(Sarah and Jimmy laugh)

EDDY: Isn't this cool, Ed?

(Edd's ants walk past, carrying Kevin's pedal bin and something boomerang 
shaped)

ED: Huh?

EDDY: We can do whatever we want!

ED: Like fly? (He jumps into the air. Eddy holds him up for a second, then 
falls on him)

EDD: (Dully) Attention, please. (He is wearing a pantyhose on his head and 
standing on a fire hydrant) Uuh, your attention, please!

(The kids look)

ED: Why is Double Dee wearing pantyhose on his head?

EDD: (Cheerful) I have good news for us all. I have taken the liberty of 
phoning all your parents!

(Edd's tone of voice indicates that he thinks the kids will thank him)

KEVIN: What?

ROLF: Huh?

NAZZ: Oh man!

JONNY: You didn't!

KEVIN: You're bluffin'.

EDD: No, really! They're on their way home right now!

(The kids panic)

EDD: (sticking out his chest) No thankyous are necessary.

(Ed gasps)

EDDY: (Panicked) He's flipped!

ED: Am I in trouble now?

(Kids scream. Rolf chases Wilfred, holding a chicken)

ROLF: Wilfred! Quickly! (screams)

(Jimmy and Sarah are scooping the icecream mountain back into some containers)

SARAH: Scoop faster, Jimmy!

JIMMY: My tummy hurts...

(Nazz stumbles past, with ants on her hair)

NAZZ: Get offf!

(Kevin screams)

JONNY: (Jumping) I can't find my clothes!

EDD: N-no need to panic, as order will soon be restored!

(Ed and Eddy pull him off the hydrant)

EDDY: Now we have to do what grownups tells us to again! (Covers Edd's mouth)

KEVIN: (angry) Double Dork! (Shakes fist) You broke the number one rule: Don't 
squeal!

ROLF: (Running past) Wilfred is a very quiet pig, Kevin.

KEVIN: Hold it, Rolf. Gimmie a hand here...(Pulls Rolf into shot)

ROLF: (Angry) Yeess... The closet can wait!

(Jonny walks over)

JONNY: (Angry) I've got goosebumps!

(Ed is now holding Edd, who is looking puzzled)

EDDY: Um, see, Double Dee just broke a rule, like us guys. (laughs nervously)

EDD: No, I didn't, E-(Eddy covers Edd's mouth)

EDDYD He's delusional. A-and the pantyhose is too tight. His brain's squished.

(Eddy grabs his head round the center, squashing it like a stressball)

KEVIN: (Advancing on the Eds) I think it's time for a little order...

ROLF: (Likewise) Yah-yah.

(Kevin, Rolf and Jonny laugh as they block out the view of the Eds)



(The Eds are in a cage hanging from a tree.)

EDDY: I can't believe you told on us.

EDD: I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me. The flagrant disregard for 
rules must've caused me to go, (Puts his hand on his head) uh, temporarily 
insane...

ED: (Happy) Somebody's coming!

EDDY: Hey, over here!

(Whistle. The Eds hold out signs that match what they say)

EDDY: Help!

EDD: Please assist!

ED: Ketchup!

(Rolf walks past happily. He is back in his normal clothes)

EDDY: Yoohoo, up here!

ED: Just a squirt?

EDDY: Can't you read?

EDD: Signs are meant to read?

ED: There's Jonny!

(The Eds wave their signs)

EDDY: Hey up here!

JONNY: (As Eddy speaks) Listen to the clowns gurgle in the bucket, Plank. Geushinedet!

EDDY: Help us out! Be a rebel, come onn!

(Iris out on the cage)

    Source: geocities.com/realclanker/transcript

               ( geocities.com/realclanker)