Note to Americans and other foreigners: Viz was (and to a lesser degree still is) a "satirical" comic originally produced at (I believe) Newcastle University which gained cult status in the mid 80's, and is, despite going rapidly dowhill still available in the UK - you can even buy it in WH Smiths which just goes to show how "radical" it still is!

In addition to it's "toilet" level of humour (nothing wrong with that) and characters with names like Buster Gonad and Johnny Fartpants, Viz was famous for some classic cartoons with appallingly corny punchlines (e.g. scientist in the middle of the countryside looking through a microscope while surrounded by cows - punchline "How long have you been working in this field Professor?" - more of a visual gag I suppose.) as well as it's Top Tips "sent in by readers".

The Top Tips here are not (I believe) actually from Viz (wouldn't want to infringe on anyone's copyright!), but have been collected from various other sites on the web. Enjoy.

• Bee keepers - Keep bee hives in strawberry fields to get jam instead of honey.
• Pretend your house is a pub by stubbing out cigarettes on the carpet, watering your cans of beer and kicking your wife out into the garden at 11:30.
• Keep monkeys out of your kitchen by hiding bananas on top of a wardrobe in your bedroom.
• International master criminals - Tell your guards to shoot James Bond in the head at the first opportunity. Under no circumstances give him a guided tour of your base, or leave him in the custody of attractive women in bikinis.
• Old telephone directories make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and address of people you don't know.
• Avoid over ordering milk by placing your fridge on the pavement just outside your gate. The milkman can then check your day-to-day requirement for himself.
• A teaspoon placed in a glass on the back seat of your car makes a handy audible gauge for road bump severity.
• Fool other drivers into thinking you have an expensive car phone by holding an old TV or video remote control up to your ear and occasionally swerving across the road and mounting the kerb.
• When out driving always turn left. Then, should you become lost, you can find your way home by reversing the procedure and always turning right.
• Save money on doorbell batteries by removing them and simply popping to the door every two minutes to see if anyone is there.
• Smell gas? Locate the suspected leak by striking an match in every room in the house until a loud explosion reveals the source of the leak.
• Make shopkeepers feel like criminals and con men by carefully checking their change and holding bank notes up to the light before accepting them.
• Give your friends the impression that you wear expensive contact lenses by blinking frequently midway through conversations, and stopping to carefully pull at your lower eyelids.
• Wig wearers - Secure your toupee in high winds by wearing a brightly coloured party hat with elasticated chin strap. Carry a balloon and a bottle of wine and you'll pass off as an innocent party-goer.
• Plastic tops from smartie tubes make ideal Frisbees for a pet gerbil, or hamster.
• Fun-sized Mars bars make ideal normal-sized Mars bars, for dwarfs.
• King-sized Mars bars make ideal normal-sized Mars bars, for giants.
• Normal-sized Mars bars make ideal king-sized Mars bars for dwarfs, as well as fun-sized ones for giants.
• Lose weight quickly by eating raw pork and rancid tuna. I found that the subsequent food poisoning/diarrhoea enabled me to lose 12 pounds in only 2 days.