Space Ghost - Chicago Style
by Magnes and EA Karras
Rating: PG
XOVER: Space Ghost
Notes: This started as an evil thought on Magnes' part. :)
(Then Karras picked it up and started running!)
Feedback: Contact Karras at ekarras@woodstock.com
Magnes at twisted_knickers@hotmail.com
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Space Ghost - full-time superhero and talk show host - SG
Zorak - an evil mantis, arch enemy of Space Ghost and his band director- Z
Moltar - a lava man, another enemy of Space Ghost, in charge of production -
M
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Space Ghost and Fraser:
SG: Constable Fraser, welcome to the show.
BF: Thank you kindly.
SG: Red suits you.
BF: Thank you.
Z: Suits your partner better.
BF: Pardon?
M: Your partner.
BF: Which one? They've both worn the traditional s...
SG (interrupts): The Marlon Brando one.
BF: Ah.
(awkward pause)
SG: So....you've worked with Brando, have you?
F: Umm...no. You see, my partner's father was a very big fan of Mr. Brando's
SG: What's he like?
F: My partner? Well, he's very energetic and his hair - (Makes a gesture above his head)
SG: No, not your partner. Whoever heard of him? Tell us about Brando! Think you could talk him into coming on my show?
F: I...don't believe that would be possible at this juncture.
Zorak: Get your own guests, Tad!
SG: Hey!
F: Tad?
SG: (leveling a power band at the mantis) That's it!
F: Oh, dear.
Space Ghost and Kowalski:
SG: Welcome to the show, Detective.
RK: Yeah? Thanks.
SG: So, your partner's a mounted, right?
RK: A what?
SG: He's a mounted?
RK: Oh! No, he's a Mountie.
SG: The horses ride him?
R: He doesn't have a horse. He has a wolf.
SG: So, his /wolf/ rides him.
RK: Well...Yeah, kinda.
Zorak: What's a wolf doing in Chicago?
RK: I never asked. Didn't seem prudence.
SG: Who's Prudence?
RK: Oh, she knows Jermaine.
SG: What?
RK: What?
Zorak: Huh?
(Ray snickers)
SG: Any...way...the wolf's deaf?
RK: Sure. I guess.
SG: You guess?
RK: Yeah.
SG: You don't know?
RK: Well, I doubt.
Space Ghost and Ray Vecchio (As Armando)
SG: So. You're Constable Fraser's part...
RV: Who? I've never hear of any Fraser...
SG: But it says right here you're Ray Vec-
RV: No. I'm Armando Langostini. (glares)
SG: You're...who?
RV: The bookman.
SG: You're a librarian?
RV: I'm the /book/ man.
SG: Well. All right.
Space Ghost and Fraser Sr.:
SG: So...are you REALLY a ghost or some pretend type of ghost?
FS: I never said anything of the sort. Is 'Ghost' your last name or are you some pretend type of would-be ghost?
SG: (flustered) I asked you first, Mr. Big Hat!
FS: Big Hat? Now who are you talking to?
(Meanwhile, Motar and RayK are watching CHiPs and shouting at all the car crashes as Space Ghost crashes and burns in his own unique way.)
FS: Young man, I think help is in order.
Space Ghost and Constable Turnbull:
SG: Welcome to my show, citizen Turnbull
T: Mr. Ghost, it is such an honor to be here. I have all your shows on tape...
SG (beams)
Z: Oh brother.
BF: Indeed.
RK: Hey, Turnbull, can I get copies?
SG: So, oh-fan-of-mine, are you getting enough oxygen?
T (very seriously considering): I don't seem to be suffering any type of disorientation or discomfort...none of my mental or motor functions seem to be impared in any way, so yes, Mr. Ghost, and thank you for inquiring, I believe I AM getting enough oxygen.
RK: For the first time in his life.
BF: Turnbull DOES appear to be rather overwhelmed.
RV: Benny, he's practically drooling!
F: Ray!
SG: Saaay...I thought you didn't know Constable Fraser!
RV: Whoops! Gotta go!
Space Ghost and Sgt. Sam Thorne
SG: W-who're you?!?
SST: Sgt. Sam Thorne, RCMP.
SG: Sam? But - that's a man's name!
SST: Short for Samantha, but YOU can call me Sam. Nice underwear.
SG: WHAT?
SST: Nice underwear. I like a man that's not afraid to strut his stuff in a skin-tight bodysuit.
SG: You can see my underwear?
Z: Did you wear the Batman underoos again?
SG: NO! Wait! She must have super powers!
M (offscreen): In my dreams.
SST: Who's the bug?
SG: Zorak. He loves hats.
SST: Nice vest.
Z: Gaaa....gaaa....
SG: Hey! Sam! You're supposed to be looking at my underwear!
SST: Trust me, Tad, I am.
SG: Who told you my name?
SST: That gorgeous hunk'a burning love in the asbestos suit.
M: Heh, heh, heh.
SG: Traitor!
SST: So...you fellows busy tonight?
Z: Gaaa....
M: NO!
SG: I-uh-I-uh-I-uh-
SST: Good. It's a date. I'll pick you up after the show.
Zorak: You could probably pick us all up at once.
SST: If you ask me nice.
M: I'm in love.
SG (recovering): Uh...next up, former British Prime Minister Margaret
Thatcher!
Space Ghost and Thatcher
SG: Wow. So you were the Prime Minister of /all/ of England!
MT: Well, I....no.
SG: But you're Margaret Thatcher!
MT: Yes, yes. Of course.
SG: So, you admit it.
MT: Admit what?
SG: You were prime minister.
MT: I think you have me mistaken for...
SG: No use denying it, Missy. We know who you are.
(off screen: RK: Yeh. She's the Ice Queen.)
MT: I heard that!
Space Ghost and Diefenbaker
SG: So. You're the wolf.
D:
SG: Some sources tell me you're deaf. That you, you know, can't hear.
D:
SG: Ever meet Lassie?
D:
SG: Hello! Is this thing on??
Space Ghost and Frannie
SG: You're Francesca Vecchio...(warily) Right?
FV: Right!
SG: And you're not a librarian.
FV: No....
SG: I'm relieved.
FV:
SG: So, what's it like working with the Mountie?
FV: Oh, wow...He's just so...Canadian!
SG: Could you be more...specific?
FV: Not really, no.
SG: So...
FV: Mm.
SG: Six immaculate conceptions, huh?
FV (alarmed): What??
Z: Dummy! That hasn't happened yet!
FV: Wait...wait...what??
SG: Nevermind!
END
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