RATINGS / WARNINGS: PG for language
TEASER: A companion piece to "Frannie Watches the Mountie"
Thank you to Melanie for her critical eye and excellent questions.
Ray Watches the Mountie
by Mimi
Oh Gawd. Here he comes again. He's got that earnest 'Ray, there are some starving orphans stuck in a tree and can you help me get them down and save the universe' look on his face again. I don't know if I have the energy for this today. I just know it'll involve ruining a suit, putting my life and limb in jeopardy, and worse yet, subjecting the Riv to grave danger. He'll come to me, I'll be sensible and say "No, Fraser. Ya don't gotta go around rescuing all the blind, deaf, homeless old ladies, waifs, and honest hookers who cross your path with some mystery which even the police won't handle because it's too damn weird," and he'll just say "Ray, Ray, Ray, don't we have an obligation as officers of the law to blah, blah, blah."
And you know what? I'll try to resist. I always try to resist. But he'll give me that big eyed Mountie look perfected on so many women, children and furry animals, selflessly suggest that he can handle it alone, and walk out of here with that long-suffering pride of his hanging out for everyone to see so they can all say what a jerk I am for not offering to help. I'll start to worry about the Canuck, because I know he doesn't have a clue how to handle himself in the city, I'll agree to help out, *just a little*, and next thing I know, I'll be sniffing out clues at the local soup kitchen, getting coerced into helping out, in my best slacks, spilling slop all over them as my Riv gets it's hubcaps stolen right outside the door, probably by some Canadian arms dealers waiting to blow us to bits in some dark alley.
And I'll be doing it gladly. Not that I'll ever let him know that.
Truth is, I've never met an honest to god hero before. Didn't know that was possible. Is that what they teach their kids in Canada? That if you just believe that there's good in everybody and act like a boy scout the world will reward you with truth and justice for all? Is it really that way up there? Doesn't really prepare them for the real world, does it. I mean, Fraser just keeps getting beat up by the people he tries to help. But he keeps on doing it. What the hell is wrong with him?
Oh, yeah. There's Elaine pulling him to her desk. Sheesh. Look at her talk to him. Oh my God. She's actually doing it. She's actually batting her eyelashes. Fraser, do you have any idea she's flirting with you? Flirting like crazy, but it doesn't look like it's registering. Benny, you can't be that clueless, can you?
Let's just hope Frannie doesn't decide to drop by today. Another situation which you are unprepared for. Well, can't blame you much there. She is pretty scary. I just wish she'd give it up. You and her, it couldn't happen. I mean...it just doesn't fit. Aw, not that Frannie's such a bad kid. She is my sister. I care about my sister. She just does not know what she's getting herself into. Oh, hell. You'd be a whole lot better for her than her other boyfriends. Shoot, there's no one else in the whole word I would trust with my baby sister.
Look at you. You're surrounded. Where the hell did all those women come from? It's like they crawled out of the woodwork. What? Do they just lay in wait for you to appear so they can pounce on you? I should be so lucky.
Hell. I shouldn't complain. I get just as caught up in your charm as everyone else. Shit, I hate that. I follow you around, watch you taste dog doo, dive into trash cans, all for what? Because "it's my duty"? If my Pop were around, he'd say...aw, to hell with what he'd say. Since when was he a model for anything? Besides, so far, Benton Fraser, your instincts have proven correct most of the time, and you have successfully "maintained the right" more times than I'd like to admit. Who'da thunk it? But that day when it doesn't turn out the way you expect...Aw, Benny, I just hope I'm around to pick up the pieces.
Looks like he's managing to tear himself away from that bunch of females who have him cornered. He actually looks frazzled. Kind of funny, really. I can't help but laugh. The guy can survive for days in the tundra, fighting grizzly bears and mountain lions with his bare hands, living off bugs and lichen, but be totally clueless when it comes to women. Ah, now there *are* some things I can actually lecture you about.
Finally. He escaped their manicured clutches. He's waving to me and I can tell he's back to thinking about that favor I'm going to do for him. Yeah, I'll do it. I know I will. Why? Because I've never met anyone like him and I guess the world needs some Benton Frasers in it. And I'll follow him to make sure he doesn't get killed, cause he's needed here. What is it about you, Benny? I guess...I guess I really do admire you. You're one of a kind. And I do respect you, Benny. It may not sound like it sometimes, but I do. And you know what? I do trust you. I trust you with my life.
You know, guys just don't talk about this. I don't know why, but we just don't. And guys don't say this to each other either, but you are something special. What is it? This is what makes armies of men follow their leader into battle, even if it's certain death. This is what makes one partner lay his life on the line for the other. It's not even thinking of you as a brother. You can't choose your relatives but you can choose your friends. You're just this amazing person who I want to be around and protect. That's it, I guess. You are the best of humanity. I love you, man.
Aw, jeez. I sound like a light beer commercial.
Ick. All this thinking about *feelings* makes my teeth itch.
It's a damn good thing guys don't talk like this.
mshoey@yahoo.com
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