A couple hours ago. . . in a movie theater out in the emerald green reaches of nowhere. . . an incredibly beautiful Elven male charges across the screen, effortlessly dropping Orcs left and right with his arrows. In the front row, a redhead sits, a bucket stationed in her lap to catch the drool forming on her quivering lip. The bucket is already half full. To her right, a blonde sits, curled as far away from the redhead as she can possibly be, while still trying to enjoy the movie. BLONDE: Remind me never to bring you out in public again, Ri. RI: What? He's just. . . so pretty! I can't help it, Elle! The movie screen goes into slow motion, as Legolas lets two arrows fly, and skillfully grabs his horses harness, swinging into the saddle. Ri squeals in utter joy, as movie patrons clap their hands over their ears. The noise shatters the film projectors lense, and the reels shut down, leaving very angry viewers glaring at the readhead and her blonde companion. Ri doesn't seem to notice, RI: What happened to the projector??? No! Legsy! Where are you! Hey? Why are you people throwing popcorn at me!? ELLE: Geez, Ri, thanks for ruining the movie. RI: It's not my fault they have a bad reel. ELLE: (sighing) The way you carry on sometimes. It's not like Legolas is REAL. RI: Huh? He isn't? ELLE: I mean, it's not like you can just just into Tolkien's world and have him for your own. . . Elle continues to speak, but Ri's eyes start to gloss over. She seems hard at thought, when suddenly, a decidedly evil smile crosses her face. RI: Oh I can't, can I? Ri stands on her chair and starts to cackle madly, as the audience pelts her with drink cups, popcorn buckets, and noisy babies, as Elle rolls her eyes and tries to sneak out the emergency exit. ELLE: I do not want to be here for this. tbc