The FDA is considering additional warnings
on beer and alcohol containers Some of the
suggestions are as follows:
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may
make you think you are whispering when you
are not.
******************************************
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol is a
major factor in dancing like an asshole.
******************************************
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may
cause you to tell the same boring story over
and over again until your friends want to
SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.
******************************************
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol
may cause you to thay shings likethish.
******************************************
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may
lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really
dying for you to telephone them at 4:00 AM.
******************************************
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may
leave you wondering what the hell happened
to your pants.
******************************************
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol is
the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns
on the forehead.
******************************************
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol
may create the illusion that you are tougher,
handsomer and smarter than some really,
really big guy named Chuck.
******************************************
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol
may lead you to believe you are invisible.
******************************************
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol
may lead you to think people are laughing
with you.
******************************************
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may
cause an influx in the time-space continuum,
whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of
time may seem to disappear.
******************************************
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may
actually cause pregnancy.
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