| Quarterback Sneak | Church members quietly leaving during the invitation |
| Draw Play | What many children do with the bulletin during worship |
| Half-time | The period between Sunday School and worship when many choose to leave. |
| Benchwarmer | Those who do not sing, pray, work, or apparently do anything but sit. |
| Backfield-in-Motion | Making a trip to the back (restroom or water fountain) during the service. |
| Staying in the Pocket | What happens to a lot of money that should be given to the Lord’s work. |
| Two-minute Warning | The point at which you realize the sermon is almost over and begin to gather up your children and belongings. |
| Instant Replay | The preacher loses his notes and falls back on last week’s illustrations. |
| Sudden Death | What happens to the attention span of the congregation, if the preacher goes "overtime". |
| Trap | You’re called on to pray and are asleep. |
| End Run | Getting out of church quick, without speaking to any guest or fellow member. |
| Flex Defense | The ability to allow absolutely nothing said during the sermon to affect your life. |
| Halfback Option | The decision of 50% of the congregation not to return for the evening service. |
| Blitz | The rush for the restaurants following the closing prayer. |