WIDOW’S ROW Florence Rowland Orlando is the nicest town I know And in that town is widow’s row. The men keep away from this peaceful domain, And the reason of this is obviously plain. The sight of so many widows would certainly scare ‘em, They’d be afraid some of them would snare ‘em. Now all of these ladies have wonderful traits, They’d make good companions,--congenial mates. Now there’s a nice lady who lives on the corner, She’s a good talker and of men, not a scorner. In fact for a man of wealth and position, For finding her one, she’d pay a commission. The one who gets Winnie will have all he could wish, For she does nothing but fish and fish. Mrs. Rowland is old and lame and blind, And although she has an active mind, In a man’s scheme of life, she would not fit For she can do nothing but sit and knit. Mrs. Howard is pleasant, witty and humorous, Her qualities are good and also very numerous. The man who gets her, though she’s not fat and 40, Will get for her boot, her little dog ‘Shorty’. Now she runs her machine both early and late, And she really has no use for a mate. Then there’s the two sisters so pleasant and gay, They have with the merchants a winning way. They sell them oranges quite cheap if they ask it, And have even been known to throw in the basket. Mrs. Baker’s a woman of quality and style, With a good personality and a winning smile. She has a good job; works early and late, I don’t think she is seeking a mate, For no man can cross her welcome mat, Unless he first makes friends with her cat. Mrs. Rhinder is nice and socially inclined, I am sure she is both pleasant and kind. I wonder if she has thoughts of romancing, For I hear she is taking some lessons in dancing. She might be the one to share a man’s joys, But he’d have to be father for five husky boys. Now invading this Eden came jolly young Jim, And oh dear me, what happened to him? There’s one little maid whose step did not falter, She nabbed him at once and took him to the altar. He considered himself to be very lucky, And took her away to his home in Kentucky. Mr. Davis has entered this quiet retreat, So now we will call it the ‘Honey-moon Street’. So all you nice widows, move in if you can, For Mr. Davis is bringing along his best man.