Five By Five Angel: Name Marquez? (Marquez nods) Angel: Good. I hate saving the wrong guy. Angel: Can I take off this blindfold yet? Darla: No. Angel: Can I take off something else? Darla: Happy Birthday, Angelus. Angel: She's a gypsy. Darla: I looked everywhere. Angel: What would I do without you? Darla: Wither and die. But she's not just for you. I get to watch. Angel: Next time they come after you, I'm not going to be there. And your friends aren't going to be there either -- not after being cut up and incinerated. Cordy: I knew it when you brought him in last night. Someone with that much body art is gonna have a different definition of civic duty. Wesley: After we saved his life? Cordy: When was the last time you wrote a thank you card? Cordy: Wesley, you don't change a guy like that. In fact, generally speaking, you don't change a guy. What you see is what you get. Scratch the surface, and whaddaya find? More surface. What's Angel gonna do, drag a bunch of them in here to shove a soul down this guy's throat? Wesley: He may be a ruffian. But he's already got a soul, and therefore, somewhere deep down inside, an urge to do what's right. (The door opens.) Marquez: No way, I'm gone. (Angel drags him back and slams the door.) Angel: Shut up and sit down. Cordy: I guess you're right Wesley. He's just like the Dalai Lama. Angel: You're gonna have to face your demons some time. Marquez: What if I don't want to face my demons? Angel: Then you'll have to face mine. Girl: Excuse me! Faith: Okay. You're excused. Girl: That's my boyfriend. Faith: Really? Does he have your name on him? Cause I don't see it anywhere. Lindsey: While the arguments that the District Attorney here has presented here are somewhat entertaining, this case hinges on testimony of witnesses they've been unable to produce. Lindsey: I request a dismissal of all charges against my client, whose reputation has been irreparably damaged by these proceedings. He's a law-abiding and upstanding... citizen. Angel: Your client really is. Except for that pesky drug dealing and murder stuff. Lindsey: I hate failure when there's no one else to blame it on. Lila: I'll make the contact. Lee: I don't think so. It's my deal; I'll make the contact. Lila: Let me think about it--No. Lee: Why not? Lila: It's your people skills. You don't have any. Lee: You bitch. Cordy: Unfortunately, we don't really do divorce cases. No, it's not about the money. Oh! It's about that much money! How soon can we meet? Cordy: How'd it go? Wesley: We won. Cordy: Gang-guy testified? Angel: Stood up and told the truth. Cordy: What did I tell you? Wesley: That he never would. Cordy: You can always tell when he's happy. His scowl? Slightly less scowly. Faith: Who is we? And why do they know about me when I don't know jack about you? Lila: Green is my favorite color. I look good in diamonds. And I love riding in limousines. Angel: Not everyone screams. Darla: What? Angel: When you kill em. Some just stand there, frozen. While others... Darla: What are you doing? Are we playing a game? Angel: The children -- they usually scream. Darla: Yes. They sound just like little pigs. Have you brought me some? Angel: Funny. You'd think with all the people I've maimed and killed, I wouldn't be able to remember every... single... one. Lindsey: To make a long story less long, I think for services rendered, we can get you off. Faith: You don't know how many men have promised me that. Lee: It might behoove you to know a little bit more about your intended, so before we discuss remuneration... Faith: Huh? Lee: Payment. Lee: I wanna make sure you understand this firm is in no way connected to anything you do. It's my ass on the line here. I don't want you to make me look bad. (Faith whams him a good one.) Faith: How do you look now? Lila: She shows initiative. Lindsey: Jesse, I think you'd better make it three for dinner instead of four. Cordy: It's not the kind of case I'd normally go after, but we've got to consider the bottom line. Angel: What kind of demons are we dealing with? Cordy: Well, it's not exactly a "demon thing." Wesley: What kind of "thing" is it? Cordy: It's a... kind of... husband and wife breakup thing. Wesley: A divorce case? Angel: You're kidding. Cordy: What's wrong with a divorce case? Angel: It's not what we do. Cordy: According to the husband, the wife's a real witch. Wesley: Seems a bit on the seedy side. Cordy: This is not seedy. He's in government. Cordy: Oh, and we should pick up the tab for lunch. Nothing says success less than splitting the bill. Angel: I didn't bring any money with me. Cordy: Okay, Elvis, when you're a big star, you can get away without carrying cash. And while we're on the subject, I think one of us should apply for a small business loan. Just to get us through the rough spots. I mean, what's a 30-year loan to you? Faith: That was so cool! This is gonna be fun. Wesley: Oh my god, Faith. Angel: I thought she was in a coma. Cordy: Pretty lively coma. Angel: Giles said she left Sunnydale about a week ago. Described her mental state as borderline psychotic. Cordy: That explains her outfit. Wesley: This isn't right. Cordy: When a whacked out Slayer tries to kill your boss, it's very wrong. Wesley: I meant Giles. Why didn't he give me the heads up? I was Faith's Watcher. When she came out of her coma, Giles should have contacted me immediately. Cordy: Maybe he was busy trying to keep her from, I don't know, killing everybody? Angel: Make yourselves scarce. I don't want to give her any free targets. Wesley: You've been targeted by a psychotic. I'm certainly not going to run and hide. Cordy: I like the plan where I'm scarce. Wesley: We've got to band together. Strength in numbers. Cordy: Two's a number. Wesley: It seems you're taking this personally. Angel: She tried to shoot my own personal back, so yeah. Wesley: She's not a demon. She's a sick, sick girl. If there's even a chance she can be reasoned with... Angel: There was. Last year, I had a shot at saving her. I was pulling her back from the brink when some British guy kidnapped her and made damn sure she'd never trust another living soul. Cordy: Angel, it's not Wesley's fault that some British guy ruined your... oh wait. That was you. Go on. Wesley: You don't need to. Faith: Hey, baby. Come give us a hug. Angel: I was hoping you'd stop by. Always good to see old friends. Faith: You didn't shoot to kill! We're gonna have to up the stakes. Get you in the game a little. Angel: What's the game, exactly, Faith? Boredom? Revenge? Faith: Dude, I'm getting paid. They hate you almost as much as I do. Lawyer: We have to close Gruber now. Before the soft offer becomes hard and the stock goes... Angel: Through the ceiling! Lawyer: In the toilet! Angel: Right. Angel: Where's Faith? Lindsey: Should I know what you're talking about? Angel: Your new employee. Lindsey: It's a big firm. Tell you what I can do, I can give you the number to personnel, though. I'm sure they'd be glad to handle your problem. Angel: You'd remember this one -- pretty, dark hair, kills things. Angel: Too bad the body burned up before it hit the ground. I mighta needed a good lawyer. Lindsey: I'm sorry. We only handle a certain class of clientele. Angel: I'm sure I've killed enough people to qualify. Lindsey: You know, just when I think I've got you figured out, you show up in a suit. Wesley: A woman fitting Faith's description was involved -- however, not arrested. Cordy: She charm her way out? Wesley: No. Apparently, she managed to break a policeman's jaw with his own handcuffs before she disappeared into the night. Cordy: Oh. For Faith, that is charm. Cordy: Phantom Dennis, let us in. It's all right. It's only Wesley. Wesley: Dennis your ghost, I presume? Cordy: Yes. He's jealous. (To Dennis) Don't worry. Hell will freeze over before I have sex with him. Wesley: Thank goodness for small favors. Cordy: I'm gonna pack a bag. Wesley: Cordelia, please. Just a few things. We're not going on safari. Wesley: It's not too late. Faith: For cappuccino? Cause that just keeps me up. Faith: All these little cuts and bruises just bring out the mother in me. Faith: Don't poop out on me, dammit! Otherwise this is all just gonna be over too fast. You'll be dead, and I'll be... bored. Faith: Now, we've only done one of the five basic torture groups. We've done blunt, but that still leaves sharp, cold, hot, and loud. Have a preference? Faith: Oh, that's great. It's always better with audience participation. May I take your order, please? Wesley: I was your Watcher, Faith. I know the real you. And even if you kill me, there's just one thing I want you to remember. Faith: What's that, love? Wesley: You... are a piece of shi -- Cordy: Here, another guy ran into something he referred to as the Bitch from Hell, who sent him home with paramedics. Faith: I feel it's kind of my duty to tell you that if you'd been a better Watcher, I would have been a more positive role model. Faith: Face it, Wesley, you really were a jerk. Always walking around like you had some great big stake rammed up your English Channel. Faith: Admit it, Wesley, didn't you always kind of have the hots for me? Faith: How do I know you're really in this? I mean, if I kill him, would that help? Or just be really funny? Angel: By the way, you never told me how much I'm worth dusted. Just out of curiosity. Faith: Fifteen thousand, plus expenses. Angel: You're kidding. Faith: Hey, I'm young. I'm gonna work my way up. Angel: You feel young, do you, Faith? You're looking pretty worn out to me.