Robert Wallace Paolinelli
705 Vallejo St. No.6
San Francisco, Ca
94133-3820
415-986-8026
KNOSSOS IN SPRING
Mildred sat
watching the bull from the safety of her car.
Spring was in full bloom. The day was bright and the sun
just right with a warmth which enveloped her, lulling
her into thinking life was always so gently warm and mellow. A fair breeze moved the air
gracing it with a tender redolence which clung to her hair, her skin, and
taking deep draughts of the scented spring air pulling deeply into her lungs
she became a bit light headed, but she didn't care because she felt she was
even inhaling the songs of the birds whose song was held in the air by some
touch of magic making a hovering resonance which could be heard all over the
countryside, heard by both men and beasts.
Mildred, who
lived in the city, had driven to the country.
Today was her day off and she felt she needed to be dressed in her new
spring dress and shoes and be among flowers and trees and walk on rocky,
rutted, rustic roads and commune with nature.
The city air was choking her; she longed for open space and sights
cleared of masses of people and their frenzy of cars accompanied by noise and
ugly smells from exhaust pipes. Out here
in the bliss of the country she was sheltered by a
blue sky and the kind of peace she sought.
Some distance
from the city she turned off the freeway, and finding
a narrow road, she followed it. The road led her to remote country farms far
and few between. Just the sort of refuge
she needed. She drove slowly, drinking in and savoring
the sights, sounds and the sunshine of the day.
Gradually, however, she was finding the car a hindrance
and a frustration more than anything else, for there were so many delightful
places which attracted her, making her want to stop at all of them, and she
did, but the stopping and the starting was distracting her. It was hard to chose
between the dark, jade green moss covered rounded stones on the banks of a
small stream and a stand of wild irises next to a clump of bright yellow
dandelions rivaling the haughty irises
Everything
seemed to beckon to her while behind the wheel of her sedan. She cocked her
head back and made a decision: "No,
I won't let this car make me its slave," she said out loud feeling very
brave and independent. Spring always
made her feel just a little extra assertive.
When she saw the wooden fence, the tall shade tree, the
brook, and a profusion of various wildflowers, she saw her ideal spot come into
view. The right setting for a long stay
was found at last. This was the perfect
spot to jump out into nature, and she was happy.
That's when she saw the bull and kept her engine running and
was hesitant to shut it off. She was
afraid to get out because of the very large bull behind the high fence.
The bull's
head was down grazing close to the ground.
When Mildred's car slowed, stopped and idled, the bull tilted its big
head and gave a perfunctory look over its shoulder. This bull was no stranger to machines and returned to biting at the grass and paid no
more attention to the humming machine.
Feeling she
was wasting gasoline, Mildred shut the engine, but was still apprehensive about
leaving the safety of her car.
"Suppose the bull charges the fence and breaks through and gores
me?" thought Mildred, trying hard not to spoil the good mood of the day so
far; nevertheless,
she was afraid. "You
are being foolish" she exclaimed out loud, and that outburst seemed to
settle her fears and with her mind now at ease and her conviction strong, she
got out of her car and smelled the scented air and admired the colors of the
wildflowers At last free of the car, she
twirled and laughed and looked up into the turquoise sky then down to her new
spring dress spreading out and rising and she was genuinely full of glee at
this show of spontaneity. Mildred
slowed and feeling a little dizzy wanted to sit down to regain her
equilibrium. She sat under a tall, tall
tree, an oak which must have been very, very old.
Leaning against the base of the oak she enjoyed a
slightly elevated vantage point allowing her to see clearly beyond the fence
into the meadow and the bull which stood out dark and
conspicuous among the young green grasses and vari-colored
flowers. The bull's horns stretched out
at least two feet on each side--or so she imagined, and her imagination was not
too far wrong. The horns had been what
frightened her most upon seeing the bull.
Now, however, as she sat still, calm flushed and refreshed, her petty
fears of his horny spread were lost in the soothing, relaxed state she found
herself in.
She watched the bull and his impression called up in her mind words
and phrases connected to bulls and horns, and in so doing she played a little
game with herself trying to recall and recite as many references as she could
think of with horn and bull: To take the
bull by the horns, no bull, to bulldoze someone, shoot the bull, on the horns
of a dilemma, horn in on someone, to be a bully, and suddenly she uttered
"and bullshit." Her
normal reserve was shocked by what she'd said out
loud, but the magic of the day was upon her and she went lightly on herself for
this breech of verbal decorum. To be
horny, slipped into her conscious-ness; "Oh," she said crinkling up
her face and pinching her lips together tightly. This phrase, too, she found offensive, it
grated on her conventional sensitivity.
How could anyone treat sexual desire so basely, equating it with some
animal lust? Why it
was so positively degrading. She
was somewhat the prude, even if she would not admit it.
The bull
walked away from his spot traveling in an arc.
When he stopped, he was closer to the fence and facing Mildred, yet he
paid no mind to her;
she was, after all, only so much blur from his distance from her.
He could smell
her scent, however, her eau de cologne, the one she'd selected to daub on her
body after her morning bath;
it was wafted to the bull's powerful olfactories
by a gentle wind and her smell pleased the bull.
Having sat for
as long as she needed to recompose herself, Mildred got up, and not with a
little apprehension made her way to the fence.
At first
Mildred hesitated at the fence, then put her left foot on the middle rail, took
hold of the top rail and pulled herself up, resting her arms on the top rail
with her waist half bent as she leaned over in a comfortable manner.
The wind, from
behind her again carried the smell of her cologne and her natural odors to the
bull and he was pleased, for he recognized the smell and he liked it, and lifting his nostrils high, he caught the scent on
the wind and he walked closer to its source.
Mildred tensed
when the bull trotted closer and her body's smell of fear was carried on the
wind to the bull who stopped and sniffed the new smell deeply; he too tensed and sensed danger; but the wind carried a new smell when Mildred
relaxed.
The bull stood
still for a long time. Mildred could now
see him ever so clearly. On its chest
was a large white spot which seemed even whiter than
it was against his otherwise deep, dark brown body, which seemed to shine under
the bright sun.
The bull
lifted his head and she fixed her gaze on him and tried to make eye contact
with the horned beast;
but the bull would have none of it; for he lowered his head to the ground and
began to graze.
The longer
Mildred watched, the calmer (in spirit) she became. Gradually, she lost her fear and she let
herself be comfortably limp on her railing perch with this grand beast her
private spectacle.
The bull was
now sitting down; its
legs tucked under its proud wide chest.
The bull was calm, satisfied; it sensed no danger from any
quarter. Mildred, too, felt no danger.
And
then she did something which was completely out of character: with a delicate swing of her leg and a pull
of her arms, and being careful not to catch her dress on the rough rail, she
was over the fence and on the ground before she was even aware of what she had
done. The bull flicked his tail at some pesky flies. Mildred
sat where she'd alighted. With her legs under her, she
posed with her pretty spring dress arranging it neatly around her. And clasping her
hands in her lap, she half closed her eyes and concentrated her gaze on some
nearby flowers.
She didn't try
to pretend the bull was not there, but because she was so calm (something not
normally part of her demeanor) any menace presented by the bull went unnoticed,
pushed away by the peace she was feeling and the pleasure she felt gazing at
flowers in complete abandon.
Slowly , unaware of what she was doing, she began to coordinate her
breathing with the slowed beat of her heart and began to focus all of her
attention on her breath and heart beat, and her mind drifted into a peaceful
state, and by degrees she gave herself away to the exact contemplation of these
inner phenomena; gradually her awareness
of her connection with the ages opened her psyche, where ancient archetypes
slept in the crypt of consciousness, where old rituals lay waiting to be
summoned and acted out to satisfy forces stronger than the intellect, for
aspects of the inner mind are primitively powerful beyond reason. There in that state, Mildred rose above her
contemporaneous self, the one known to all her friends and family. There arose from deep within her, spiraling
up her spine like a thousand transforming serpents of gold and silver, the
re-awakened images and juices of remote longings, spurting through her arteries
and spreading throughout her nervous system.
A force from a
source beyond time and daily thoughts gripped her from her very marrow through
every muscle, every organ, every neuron, down to the core of her brain; and all this physical transformation brought
heat: her body glowed with warmth; every pore tingled, shivers of ecstasy made
her body tremble with pent up, awakening energy. Showers of colors flashed before her
eyes; the whole meadow seemed to sparkle
with precious jewels, and the sounds of the lea harmonized, all synchronized to
help fulfill the image which destiny had recreated in her ancient and aroused
consciousness..
Mildred was
now lost to her generation, her time; her memories and social position were
obliterated by the assumption of the archaic archetype. She now belonged to the cosmos, the endless
ages, regressing to another time, a remote era when differentiation of things
was dim and the concept of self was concatinated with
everything else.
Freed from all
conventional restraints, guided by another mind, she removed her dress and
undergarments. She stood naked in the
spring sun singing paens in a language spontaneously
created with her every utterance.
Bending down
she plucked flowers and delicate stems of grasses and wove them into garlands which she wore around her neck and on her
head. Completely innocent, she steeped
through the meadow on light feet immersed in the moment, the supreme moment of
destiny.
The bull neither moved when she approached him and decorated his head
and horns with flowers, nor did he feel intruded upon when she sat next to him,
skin to skin, stroking his neck and rubbing her hand on his body. The bull sniffed the air and it was good. She hummed music which
long ago people knew but had since forgotten.
In her throat warbled that music which defied all laws of reason and
logic, a music which had its own memory and
meaning. The bull understood the music
and swayed his head clumsily with it.
She stood and
moved her body rhythmically. Her
gyrations were slow and her steps slow, graceful movements as she danced around
the bull.
Thrice she
circled him in her ancient dance, thrice she spoke
words slowly, intoning them with reverent voice. Now faster went her dance of sensual motions
slicing the air with hidden meaning.
Her song rose
up louder, and its tone changed from a lilting largo to a sharp staccato sung
faster and with the new rhythm of her dance and song, the bull's ears went up
as if to catch more clearly the meaning of her song. Memories stirred within his bovine brain,
memories unknown to men and their philosophies.
Her dance
became wilder. She contorted her body
and made rigid her movements syncopated with jagged leaps and arms scratching
the air and her teeth gnashing, her lips curled almost in a snarl, and for a moment she was ugly.
The bull sniffed the air; the message of the ages received with
her smells told him what to do and what to expect.
She leaped
over the bull's back. To
and fro she leaped, her skill increasing as her memory reawakened more
and more. With an airy leap she landed with her feet on his back. And with a sudden
bending of this stance, she threw her body into the air backwards. Up she went, turning and landing
effortlessly, sure-footedly on the bull's massive head. Her arms reached out and each hand grabbed a
horn, steadying herself for her next leap.
She kicked out
her feet and stretched back her head and arms;
her body turned in the air; she
landed and recove- red, turned and faced the bull
with arms raised up to the sky and her legs akimbo. The great beast rose up on all fours and,
twisting his neck and shaking his body, he bellowed out as if in answer to her
primeval song and dance.
She laughed
and moved her body in a high-legged prance limbering up her newly awakened
body.
Through
obedience to original orders, the bull awaited his partner. She ran several paces, leaped into the air
and landed on his huge head; again she
grabbed his horns; and by command, she
sang him into a slow trot; his heavy
hooves crushed flowers and grasses; he
plodded around in the direction she dictated by the pulling of his horns. Her voice called out for speed and the bull
hastened his pace to a gallop. Around
and around the meadow she went riding the bull to re-enact archetypes and
cosmic remembrances remani- fested
in her after aeons of dormancy from the human
condition.
Laughter and
song tumbled from her mouth like sparkling jewels. Birds called out in answer to her
laughter. Around and around the bull and
the maiden went dancing out the ritual in unconscious participation.
Earth-sprung
lusts and gusts of warm spring air vibrated and stimulated the participants in
the afternoon meadow. She slowed the
bull's gallop and performed feats of sommersaulting
on his back, springing into the air with the grace of a flying puff ball borne by a gentle breeze. Then to the ground she went playing, tempting
the horns and trampling feet of the bull but-swiftly-leaping
through his spread of horns and recovering on his back. Several times she
stood holding onto one horn and stretched out one leg and arm reaching out and
up like the rays of a star. She gloried
in the play and in the dance. Again and again she threw herself into the air landing and
swift-footedly running to the front of the bull presenting her body as a target
to the horns and hooves, but with the precision of an acrobat and the grace of
a ballerina, she leaped over his horns and onto his back just at the most
perilous moment landing safely on her feet-all in a trice it was done.
She lay on the
beast's back resting and staring up into the blue sky unaware that there was
any other way of life. Immersed in this
timeless state, she was oblivious of the world she'd
left.
But that other world was aware of her: for while she and the bull trotted in trance,
a farmer and his helpers passed in a truck, saw her and stopped, gawked in
disbelief. And
while they gawked a county road repair truck with its five man crew arrived on
the scene. They too stared at the
spectacle in front of them. But all they saw was a naked woman performing crazy
gymnastics on a bull.
The men became
more and more excited. And while she lay on her back contemplating the sky, the men
grew impatient. One farmhand pressed the
truck's horn and called out, "Hey, lady, get off your back so's we can see your beaver! Haw, haw, hee, ha!"
All the men laughed. Then the two
horns of the parked trucks were blowing and the men shouted in a chorus of
coarse comments: "I got a horn for
you, honey," said one, "I'm quite a bull myself!" shouted
another.
The spell was
broken. Suddenly Mildred became aware of
herself naked, holding onto the horns of a bull!
"I've
gone mad!" she screamed. Fear
seized her; her
grip froze on the horns. She dared not
let go. "How did I get here?"
she questioned herself in a state of panic.
The bull sensed the cessation of the magic.
His nostrils
picked up the scent of fear of the rider on his back. He tossed his mighty head in an attempt to
shake off the fear on his back, he kicked up his hind
legs. Mildred's grip, frozen at first by
fear, now began to weaken;
her fingers loosened. The
men shouted and tooted the trucks' horns.
The bull
became angry at the calls and the horn blowing.
He now had two problems: the
weight of fear on his back and the noise makers and taunters jarring his nerves. Straight to the source of the irritation
charged the mighty bull of Knossos, maddened by mocking men and their
machines. The bull knew no fear and
lowered its head.
Some of the
men were foolish enough to have climbed over the fence teasing the charging
beast,. presenting themselves
as targets, daring destiny. Before
anyone of them realized what had happened, the bull struck the fence. It was a strong fence, but the bull's charge
was stronger and his ramming head broke a fence post and the railings dropped
and dumped the men to the ground.
One of his
horns hooked a farmhand and blood spurted from the man's side. A hoof crushed the hand of another. The other taunters
jumped to the safety of their trucks.
The road repair truck had a radio and the screaming, panicky voice of
the crew chief was calling into his microphone for the sheriff.
The maddened
bull stamped and butted and snorted in uncontrolled
anger, but at last he was freed of the burden on his back. Upon impact with the fence post Mildred had
been thrown off violently and fell under the hooves of the bull and her neck
broken. She died instantly.
A sheriff's
car arrived with red lights blinking in the golden spring day and its siren
blaring, drowning out the dulcet songs of the birds. The deputy sheriff stood at the fence, his
rifle at the ready. He took careful aim,
held his breath and fired. The bullet
easily found its mark: straight through
the bull's white spot on its chest. A
few staggers, a hollow moan from its throat and the bull of Knossos dropped
dead in its tracks.
An examination
of the facts by the sheriff brought little light on how Mildred came to be
naked on that bull's back. Her clothes
were found, her purse was in her car, but nothing could be found to prove
anything about her actions.
Her body was
taken to the morgue and her car and possessions taken to the courthouse. Her kin came to claim her body. Mildred's family was shocked. Some thought her gone mad, others said, among
themselves, that she had probably taken drugs, but a coroner's autopsy proved
otherwise and her actions were ever a mystery.
The owner of
the bull wanted to sue for damages to his fence and the destruction of his
livestock; but
the owner's lawyer wasn't sure whom he should sue.
In a few weeks the story lost its interest, but now and then some
would mention the crazy naked woman who had ridden a bull in the spring meadow.
The End
{NOTE BY R. Haig: Fragmented text below retrieved from
original MS Word document}
The maddened
bull stamped and butted and snorted in uncontrolled anger, but at last he was
freed of (2/21/99 2/15/99 çLe
fence post Mildred had lbeen thrown off violently and
fell under the hooves of the bull and her neck broken. She died instantly.
A sheriff's
car arrived with red lights blinking in the golden spring day and siren
blaring, drowning out the dulcet songs of the birds. The deputy sheriff stood at the fence, his
rifle at the ready. He