"I'm taking a break now." Mitsui mumbled to his
boss as he walked out the back door. He was already more than fed up with
the job, dealing with customers and whatnot. Not to mention, waiting on people
in a restaurant was not exactly what he had thought he'd be doing. Still, he had
no choice. There were bills to pay -- the rent, tuition, etc. Even with Rukawa
working at a gas station, they could barely make ends meet.
He took a deep breath of the fresh evening air. It was a beautiful night, the
stars were out and he enjoyed the quiet stillness; it sure beat the bustling
madness inside. He took out a cigarette from his pocket and lit it. Putting it
up to his lips, he vaguely remembered when he had even started the habit to
begin with. Rukawa hated it with a burning passion -- and he knew it. The
younger boy called it 'disgusting' and refused to allow him to smoke inside the
apartment. Mitsui smiled.
Rukawa.........
It felt as though he had not seen the boy in weeks, though they lived in the
same apartment. They even shared the same bed. Yet somehow... somehow... they
managed to drift apart. It wasn't so much that he didn't understand why they
were seeing less of each other. Between school and work it was almost impossible
to spend any time together. Perhaps they were both just weary from their long
days. Whenever they would see each other, there would be this sort of silence --
a sort of nonchalance. He knew Rukawa wasn't one to be overly affectionate. He
wasn't expecting an onslaught of hugs and kisses and 'I love you's. But he knew
the other boy. And he knew how Rukawa would express himself. The younger boy's
affection would take the form of simple gestures; like small smiles, and
laughter, and 'thank you's and 'how was your day?'. Even those seemed to have
become a rarity.
At the same time though, he knew it wasn't only Rukawa. He knew it was himself
as well. Sometimes, it felt as though he didn't even have the energy to show his
love. He couldn't even remember when it began. He was sure that he didn't
realize it at the time. Looking back now however, it seemed obvious. He would
come home late from work and see Rukawa either watching TV or sleeping -- of
course that was when the younger boy was home at all. Rukawa would look up from
the TV and say nothing, most likely tired himself. Mitsui would then drag
himself to the bathroom to wash up. And soon afterwards, go to bed. There were
times when he had actually spent the nights alone because Rukawa would be
assigned the
He wondered when was the last time they had slept together. He remembered how
when they first moved into the apartment, they would stay up until nearly dawn
making love. The next day would like hell from the lack of sleep but that didn't
stop them. Did he miss it? Of course. But damn... now, he was just too tired to
even feel horny.
He was in his last year of college; Rukawa his second.
One... Two... Three... Four...
Four....
They had been together for four years. Thinking back about it, he almost
couldn't believe they had been together for so long. When they first started
going out he never thought that they'd last until now.
Shohoku... basketball... the team...
God, why did it seem so long ago? And why did things seem so much simpler then?
He remembered how long it took to admit to himself that his feelings for the
younger boy went beyond an appreciation for good playing skills. He also
remembered how surprised and in disbelief he was when he discovered that he
feelings were returned. Why did Rukawa like him? He never really understood. Nor
did he ask. Could Rukawa have admired him? He shrugged. Maybe. Maybe not. It
seemed trivial now.
When he left for college, things got a little harder. They weren't able to see
each other as much. They didn't really talk on the phone; neither one of them
were much for words. Sometimes he would take the train to Kanagawa for the
weekend just to see the other boy. Other times, Rukawa would travel out to
He remembered how shocked he was when Rukawa announced that he was applying to
the same college. He told the younger boy not to do such a thing just because of
him. Of course, Rukawa insisted that he had nothing to do with it. And of
course, even if he did, there was no way he could convince the stubborn boy to
do otherwise.
He always thought things between them would become easier when they decided to
move in together. But, he was wrong. He never anticipated that closing their
physical gap could mean the opening of new ones.
He never thought of breaking up. He didn't see any reason to. They never faught.
They rarely argued about things. Even when they did, it was usually over
something as small as 'can you please stop smoking.' He often caught himself
wondering however, if the thought ever crossed Rukawa's mind. The idea almost
scared him. Whenever he would come home and the other boy wouldn't even bother
to look up. Or the occasional paranoia that Rukawa wasn't really at work all
those nights he spent by himself in the lonely bed. He found himself being
reassured by things such as 'wake up, you're late for class' or 'eat before you
leave.'
I guess we're still okay.... he thought to himself.
With one last exhale, he flicked the butt of the cigarette onto the floor,
stepping on it to make sure that the flame died.
Time to go back to work..... he sighed, reluctantly leaving the peaceful
solitude of the night.
*~*~*~*~*~*
Struggling with the lock, Mitsui made a mental note to remind himself to get the
door fixed. He flicked on the switch as he entered. Looking around, he noticed
that Rukawa wasn't home yet. He threw his bag down and made his way to the
bathroom. Just as he turned on the faucet the phone rang.
"Hello." He picked up.
"Hey, Mitsui. It's Tetsuo. Are you busy tonight?"
"No. Why?" He had an idea as to why Tetsuo was calling -- his friend
never called for anything else.
"Let's go out for some drinks."
And like always, he was right.
"I just got back from work...." He sighed, rubbing his temples.
"Come on. Just for a little bit. It's only
"Fine, fine." Mitsui gave in. "I'll see you there."
He actually didn't go out often. Usually he was too busy to. Tired as he was
though, it was still a break from things -- to go to a bar and just relax. It
was quite a coincidence that Tetsuo was in
He arrived at the bar and joined the other boy. They talked and drank for a bit
until Tetsuo left to greet a friend. Mitsui sat there quietly, thinking to
himself about the past few years.
"Hey there."
He heard an overly sweet feminine voice call out. He turned only to find that a
girl he had never met nor seen had taken the liberty to sit next to him. She
smiled and leaned towards him -- a little too close for comfort.
"Hi." Mitsui said uncertainly, backing away a bit.
"You come here often?"
"Not really..."
"Oh..." A sly smile formed on the girl's face. She slipped her arm
around Mitsui's and then whispered in his ear. "I know a place where we can
go.......... just us........"
Frowning, Mitsui pulled his arm away and rose from his seat. He took out some
money and threw it on the counter.
"I'm sorry... but I already have someone." He replied as he walked
away. He quickly told Tetsuo that he had to leave and with that, went on his way
home.
Damn, were girls getting forward. It wasn't even so much that she was ugly. She
didn't even seem drunk. Mitsui was convinced that she would have slept with
anyone. She was no doubt... promiscuous; and most probably, diseased to top it
off. He shuddered at the thought.
I already have someone....
His own words repeated in his head. He began to think back about Rukawa and
their past. Suddenly, for the first time in a long time, he really wanted to see
the younger boy.
He opened their door slowly, silently praying that Rukawa was home. He smiled
when he saw the other boy slumped on the couch, watching TV. Rukawa glanced up,
said nothing, and resumed watching. Mitsui stood there for a moment. He didn't
know what to do. He wanted to go over and hug the other boy but it seemed
awkward. He didn't even know what to say besides 'hey.' He sighed and walked to
their room.
He changed into a t-shirt and shorts and opened the closet to hang up his white
shirt. His eyes spotted something that lay on the floor and he looked down. It
was a basketball. He picked it up and blew off the light layer of dust that had
built up. Holding it in his hands, he began to feel old. Why did it feel like
everything was decades ago? He remembered it all as clear as yesterday but at
the same time, it felt as though it was part of another lifetime -- one nearly
forgotten. Back then, in high school, he couldn't even imagine a day without
basketball. It meant everything to him and he never once thought that he would
ever stop -- for anything! And he knew Rukawa must have felt the same way. But
now, it just couldn't be helped. They were busy and tired. And most of all, they
had responsibilities and obligations -- things that just had to come before
basketball. Prioritizing was possibly one of the hardest things he had learned
to do.
He smiled as a idea came to him. He walked into the living room still holding
the basketball.
"Let's go to the park." He grinned.
Rukawa looked up from the television and raised a brow.
"It's late..." The younger boy let out.
"Come on. Let's go. We haven't gone in a while."
We haven't done many things in a while.... But, that's not the point. He was
tempted to add, but then decided against it.
"You're crazy... you have class tomorrow." Rukawa replied sensibly.
"Since when did you care so much about school? You're always telling me I
have to go but I don't see you going." Mitsui argued.
"I'm only a soph." Rukawa replied smugly.
Mitsui frowned.
"Whatever. Come on. Let's go."
Rukawa made no move to get up.
"Or could it be that you're scared you'll lose?" Mitsui smirked,
knowing that the other boy would never pass on a challenge -- especially one
given by him.
Rukawa took the bait. He looked up at the other boy, his eyes clearly indicating
that he did not appreciate the comment. He picked up the remote and turned off
the TV.
"You're on." He said, getting up from his seat.
They reached the park in no time. Luckily, there were still lamps around to
light up the court. Almost immediately, Mitsui stepped up in front of the hoop
to where the 3-point line was. He shot; the ball fell through the net perfectly.
He grinned.
"It really has been a while..." He heard Rukawa say softly as he
watched the boy pick up the basketball. He looked at the younger boy who stood
in between him and the hoop. It was all so familiar, seeing Rukawa there, that
determination burning in his eyes the same way they had when they were in high
school.
"Let's go." He said, smiling.
Maybe they would've determined a winner -- had they kept score. But they didn't
care. They were too busy laughing and just having fun, forgetting about work,
and school, and just everything in general.
"You cheater!" Mitsui called out as Rukawa stole the ball.
"Don't blame me just because you're out of practice." Rukawa smirked
as he drove to the basket, doing a perfect lay-up on the way.
"Hmph." Mitsui huffed. He stared at the younger boy.
"What?" Rukawa asked, puzzled.
"Huh?"
"You're grinning like an idiot."
"I don't know.... it's just....... I feel like I haven't seen you smile in
a while. That's all...."
Rukawa blinked. He said nothing as he watched Mitsui walk towards him. He felt
the other boy's hand softly stroke his cheek as a quick kiss was placed on his
lips.
"I missed you." Mitsui wrapped his arms around Rukawa.
"Yeah... me too." Rukawa replied as he rested his head on the older
boy's shoulder.
Mitsui pulled back and once again, kissed the younger boy; only this time, it
was slower and deeper. Gently he pried open Rukawa's mouth with his own and
slipped his tongue in. Rukawa complied. He could taste the faint flavor of
tobacco on Mitsui's lips but for once, he didn't mind.
They were both panting slightly when Mitsui's broke the kiss. It must have
already been past
"Let's go home." Mitsui whispered.
"Un." Rukawa smiled.
They left the park, feeling carefree. Even though everything still seemed so
long ago, it didn't matter. All that mattered was that they were together and
they were happy. Of course they still longed for the simplicity of the past. Who
doesn't? But that didn't mean that they weren't content with the way things were
now.
They reached their apartment in no time -- both teasing each other along the way
and painfully aroused to top it off. As they lay down on their bed, somewhere in
the back of his mind, Mitsui realized that he would probably have a hard time
getting up the next morning. It's alright, he told himself.
Yeah..... we're still ok........
--End--
End Notes: teehee... finished in two days. Wow~ I think this is a record for
me... >.< I actually picked up this "plot" from the idea that
couples tend to lose their... ermm... passion... the longer they are together.
haha... as I wrote though, it kind of turned into a "growing up" thing
as well. I guess this fic means a lot to me because I feel as though
"growing up" is something I had to learn this past year. (eheh... I
think all of you on central_lemmies know this already.) Yeah... so I dedicate
this fic those all of those who ever have or will feel this way~ ^.^