Meet Mr. Push Me!
by The JavaScript Source
A.How can you breathe through something so small?
Q. Why did the girl jump in the mud puddle?
A. To get dirty!
Q. Do you know how to make a hormone?
A. Easy! Don't pay her!
Joke Story
.There were 3 guys in a car, their names were
Shut Up, Manners, and Poop. Poop fell out of the
car on Main St, Manners tried to pick him up,
Shut Up went to the Police Station, the Policeman said, 'What's your name?'
'Shut up'
'What's your name?'
'Shut Up'
'What's your name?'
'Shut Up'
'Where are your manners?'
'Down on Main St. picking up Poop.'
Joke story
Two guys were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared in court before the judge.
The judge said, "You seem like nice young men, and I'd like to give you a second chance rather than jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to show others the evils of drug use and pursuade them to give up drugs forever. I'll see you back in court Monday."
Monday, the two guys were in court, and the judge said to the first one, "How did you do over the weekend?" "Well, your honor, I persuaded 17 people to give up drugs forever." "17 people? That's wonderful. What did you tell them?"
"I used a diagram, your honor. I drew two circles like this: O o
and told them this (the big circle) is your brain before drugs and this (small circle) is your brain after drugs."
"That's admirable," said the judge. "And you, how did you do?" (to the 2nd guy)
"Well, your honor, I persuaded 156 people to give up drugs forever." "156 people! That's amazing! How did you manage to do that!" "Well, I used the same two circles. I pointed to the small circle and told them, 'This is your asshole before prison...."
He then asked the woman,
"Is there anything that you'd like to have changed?"
She replied, "Yes. Could you get rid of this middle breast?"
And so it was done, and it was good.
Then the woman exclaimed, as she was holding that third breast in her
hand, "What can be done with this useless boob?"
And God created man.
Really Funny
She said, "I'd love to be ten again."
On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and off
they went to a theme park. He put her on every ride in the park, the
Death Slide, The Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear. Everything there was,
she had a go. She staggered out of the theme park five hours later, her
head spinning and her stomach upside down.
Into McDonald's they went, where she was given a Double Big Mac with
extra fries and a strawberry shake. Then off to a theater to see Star
Wars and more hot dogs, popcorn, cola and sweets.
At last she staggered home with her husband and collapsed into bed.
Her husband leaned over and asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being
ten again?"
One eye opened and she groaned, "Actually I meant dress size."
Fatt mamma jokes
Yo mama's so fat, When she diagnosed with the flesh eating disease the doctor gave her 13 years to live.
Yo mama's so fat, Her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard.
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THAN CLICK ABOVE
Than e-mail me on and tell me! Sim_veronica@hotmail.com