Keeblex's November 1998 Quotes

Some good quotes:

A quote to keep in mind as you read these:

I may disagree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it. -Adaptation on Voltare

Life is like my cat. It looks soft, fuzzy and warm from a distance, but when you get close it bites you in the butt. -Kevin Williams Original

Life is like a turkey sandwich. First you have the bread, then you have the turkey, then you have the lettuce, then you have the bread. -Giovanni Macias

Life is like a loaded gun. If you're not careful with it, you can hurt yourself. -Kevin Williams Original

You can't mount a horse until you have a horse to mount. -Kristin Williams Original

Someone gave me the gift of common sense, but I don't have the wisdom to use it. -Kevin Williams Original

When you come to a fork in the road, take it. -Yogi Berra

Life is like a bed of roses. It has thorns. -???

Today I retain my right to remain Quoteless. -Joe

There are three kinds of people in this world...the kind who can count and the kind that can't. -Anonymous

Tradition is what you do during the bad times, waiting for the good to return. -Adaptation from "Touched by an Angel".

Chaos is nothing happening all at once. -Kevin Williams Original

Harmony is nothing happening at regular intervals. -Kevin Williams Original

Failure is your friend...? -Nina Foch

Make sure that when you drive, you always have the airbag inflated. -Chevy Chase

You can't make someone else's choices. You shouldn't let someone else make yours. -Colin Powell

Life is a funny thing. The harder you work, the luckier you get. -Melvin Simon

Make fun, not war. -Robin Williams

...'Don't complain about your taxes. Remember they are your dues to the best club in the world.' -Nina Totenberg

Know when to shut up. It can be very helpful. -Teller (of Penn and Teller)

The man who says 'It can't be done' is always inturuppted by the man who just did it. -Mickey Spillane

Expect the worst--you may sometimes get the best. -John Osborne

Baseball all wrong. Man with four balls cannot walk. -Adaptation by Jason DelaCuadra

I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to become a vegetarian. -Greg Fulaz

When truth and reality come sneaking up behind you, you need to turn around and kick 'em straight in the nuts. -Thomas Todd Original

Is religion the product of science, or science the product of religion? -Kevin Williams

Why is it that every time I gain a brain cell, you lose two? -Kevin Williams Original

How many people have calculated pi to the ten thousandth degree? Who really cares? -Kevin Williams Original

Today is not today, the optimist says. Today is yesterday's tomorrow. -Kevin Williams Original

Today is not today, the pessimist says. Today is tomorrow's yesterday. -Kevin Williams Original

Okay, who's been eat'n beans? -Jack in the box Antenna Ball

Is it just me, or does it smell in here? -B.O.

Stupidity strikes all, just some more than others. -Enrrique Corrales

Warning: My thoughts can break out into words at any minute! -Jennifer McColley

On the other hand, you have different fingers. -Jacob fink

A true friend stabs you in the front. -???

Send your name and quote to "kevvw@juno.com"!


Keeblex's December 1998 Quotes

Remember the Alamo...Remember the Maine...How do they expect us to remember so much?!? -Kevin Williams

High school is like a nuclear explosion. It appears without warning, it is very loud and scary, and there isn't much hope for those who survive. -Dan Letchworth

The stress of the holidays makes the holidays themselves seem that much better. -Kevin Williams

Hey! Stop enjoying that! -Garfield the Cat *Jim Davis*

We are all at fault for nothing. -Enrrique Corrales

When I called my dog, it came. When I call my cat, I get an answering machine! -Kevin Williams

Keepin' the faith. -SD Padres

Be proud of your pride. -Kevin Williams

When I search the abyss of society for sanity, I often feel like I alone see the sky of simplicity we live under. -Kevin Williams

Only a cat can look God in the eye without losing its feeling of royalty. -Kevin Williams

Fido means faithful in Latin. Have you ever heard of a cat named Fido? -Kevin Williams

When you forget how to spell your own name, but can still spell otorhinolaryngology without missing a beat, you know you have no life. -Keben Wilemz

Hmm...A nice loud rattle. That's a good sign. That means its not underwear. -Garfield the Cat

When shopping for a Christmas Tree, there are two things to keep in mind...One: look for a tree with soft, supple needles...and Two: your ceiling is never as high as you remember. -Garfield the Cat

History repeats itself.
History repeats itself.
-Kevin Williams
-Kevin Williams

I'm not just good: I'm better! -Natasha Blank

Hitler may have been credited for running Nazi Germany as a cruel dictator, but his cat was actually in control. -Kevin Williams

History repeats itself. -Kevin Williams

I hate cats. [Except you Buff! No, you're my cat! You're my favorite! No!! Don't do it! Not there! OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!] -Kevin Williams

{In mortal pain, Kevin has been taken to the ER. This will conclude December's Quotes.}

One word of advice: Beware the blood thirsty vampire cats! they deserve your worship!

kevvw@juno.com RULES!!!
(Send comments to me!)