Read the original FUNimation Nightmare fanfic that I wrote too, so that you... um... read it. It’s probably better than this one anyways. The big difference in this one is that it focuses on Frieza instead of all those crappy little people at Master Roshi’s house, because Frieza kicks as-*WHACK!!!* mmmppphhh!!

And another thing, I'm only making this second nightmare because of all those people who demanded a sequel *mumbles ungratefully*. So, in other words, I'm not to blame.

*scene of Goku chewing on Gohan’s head assuming it’s a bowl of rice, then quite suddenly a scene of Frieza’s space ship*

Narrator: Stupid video tape... aaanyways, Frieza is lounging around in his stupid little throne room inside a space ship and waiting for his delightful pride, the true essence of life itself: NAMEKIAN ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES!!!!

Dodoria: Frieza-Sama, I brought you your wine, and your mail!

Frieza: Good. Now waddle away before I... uh... kill you! Finally... some good ol’ Namekian wine... *quickly rips open a letter, reads the first few lines, then throws it aside*

Letter: Dear Mr. Frieza,

You may have heard about us. We roam Japan stealing, er, buying what they call ‘animes’ that go by DB, DBZ, and DBGT. By the time you finish this letter, we will have taken over your life and delete most of your future for later. We will snatch your freedom from your filthy grasp, and render you helpless. You will be able to do absolutely nothing to stop us, so you better surrender your will to us so we can change your inappropriate gibberish into blasphemously stupid entertainment for slobbering little children who regard you as nothing more than Big Bird’s cousin. You should know that we’ve already taken over your poor little associates in this pathetic life, the ones who dwell conveniently placed on Earth. Humiliation is our main objective, resistance is futile.

Sincerely,

FUNimation

Freaky Music: Duhn duhn DUUUUUHHHNNNN....

Frieza: What is that despicable crap? What’s a DBZ? ...And what was that noise?

Zarbon: *stares at the letter on the floor* How the hel-*WHACK!!!* mmmppphhh!!!

Freaky Music: Duhn duhn DUUUUUHHHNNNN....

Frieza: *swirls his wine boredly and doesn’t even look at Zarbon* Did you say something, Zarbon dearie? ........................... WHAT HAPPENED TO MY VOICE!? I SOUND LIKE A WOMAN!!!

Dodoria: Heh... eh heh heh hehh...... *snorts and giggles like a manly little school girl*

Zarbon: ...

Frieza: *turns to look at Zarbon and sees the sticker on his mouth that says..... "FUNimation Was Here!"* Zarbon what happened to... saaay... you’re lookin’ fine! Care to go out sometime, pretty boy?

Zarbon: MMMMPPPPPHHHHH!!!!!!

Frieza: ARGH!!! What’s HAPPENING TO ME!!!" *digs his fingernails into his head and whimpers* I need some wine... *takes a swig of wine, then spits it all over Dodoria* this tastes like freakin’ APPLE JUICE!!! And there’s a weird little sticker on my beautiful wine glass!!

Frieza: *turns towards Dodoria again, batting eyelashes and looking seductively at him* Y’know, I kinda like it when my henchmen are.... slippery........... AAAAAGGGHHH!!! *tears long painted nails into shiny head again*

Booming voice: I’ve gawt ye now, mah prettay little minion...

Frieza: Who... who’s there...?!

Voice: Hmm... those cuts on your head wont do at all. *thWAP thhWAK!!*

Frieza: AAAUUGHHH!!!! *furiously tries to tear the dinky little stickers off head that say ‘FUNimation’* WHO ARE YOU?!?!?

Voice: My name is FUNimation, and I own you!!! FWAHAHAAA!!!

Dodoria: Ai feel laik JELLAY!! *jiggles his monstrous pink stomach*

Frieza: SHADDAP YOU FAT LITTLE-*thWACK!* mmmmppphhh!!!

Voice: So... you doubt my powers, DO YOU!?

Frieza: *growls and nods angrily*

Voice: Ignorant beast, I’ll show you what I can REALLY do!!!

Frieza: ...

Voice: *makes Vegeta appear out of nowhere and begin singing ‘Mary Had a Little Lamb’*

Frieza: *cringes in horror, curls up in a little ball at his throne, and whimpers while covering his ear holes*

Vegeta: Mary had a little lamb... little lamb... little lamb!

Voice: Care to watch him pose for a cottage cheese commercial?

Frieza: *manages to tear off the sticker on his mouth* That DOES it!!! I’m going to RIP YOU TO SHREDS AND BEAT THE LIVING HEL-*whack whack whack whack whack whack whack whack whack whack whack whack*

Frieza: *now under a big pile of stickers*

Voice: Fwaa... haa... haaa.... Now you shall succumb to my delightful powers and become a crappy little action figure!!!

Frieza: *muffled voice from under all the stickers* nooooooo!!

Voice: Heeere kiddies

*a group of 100 something little kids suddenly dogpile what’s left of Frieza*

Frieza: AGGHH!!! I SURRENDER!!! MAKE IT STOP!!!!!

Voice: Excellent choice. Now, DBZ is MINE at last!!!!

Frieza: mommy...

Zarbon’s Voice: Frieza-Sama, wake up! WAKE UP!!!

Frieza: Zzzzz....... Huh? What? Who? Where? *opens his eyes and realizes that he’s in his room* ZARBON!!! I had a horrible dream!!! SAVE ME!!!

Zarbon: Uh... yeah... anyways, try not to pass out drunk late at night anymore, it’s giving you bad dreams.

Frieza: It was only a dream.... It was only a dream.... It was only a dream.... *hugs knees and rocks back and forth, twitching tail fearfully*

Zarbon: ...................aaaaanyways, there are a bunch of people in identical suits at the door, they have a contract that I agreed to sign, since it sounded interesting. We’re going to be dubbed to English!!!

Frieza: *gulp* Dubbed? By who...?

Zarbon: *scratches head* I think their shirts said... umm... "FUNimation"

Frieza: *promptly passes out*

Zarbon: Woah... a little too much water Lord Frieza......... what did I just say?

Narrator: And thus, the Frieza Saga is now translated. However, FUNimation did such a stupid job, that everyone who watches it wants to strangle themselves. As a result, they can’t even flick off the camera, like this-*WHACK!! The camera shot is blocked by a sticker that is covering the lense, ending this stupid little documentary*