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What the #$*! Do We Know? (2004): 3/10


Poster (c) Samuel Goldwyn Films

What the #$*! do we know? According to What the #$*! Do We Know?, not a whole lot. In fact, we know so little that the three (!) makers of the film think that we're not new-agey enough to comprehend these "awesome" forces that surround our world. We're supposed to just take what they're saying and be amazed by it all-like we've never heard amazing and outrageous theories before. So then there's this part documentary, part "drama" film involving crude animated blobs, a deaf woman (Marlee Matlin), and someone named "Ramtha", which is someone who supposedly channels a 50,000 year old spirit in them. And yet he/she has nothing better to do than star in films like this one.

Is there a central theme to What the #$*!?? No. Supposedly, there's multiples of us going through life, reality is just what our brain perceives it to be (therefore rendering the eyes useless-notice how they didn't bring up the fact that eye-less people can't see), and various other impossibilities. Is there any proof or validity to what they're saying? Then how are we supposed to believe these things? None of the scientists are credits until the end of the film, therefore not showing us their credentials, most have nothing to do with quantum physics, and, to make matters worse, most of these "scientists" said they were taken out of context for the movie. So let me get this straight: based off of some documentary featuring impossible theories with supposed mind-blowing images, a C-list actress, part documentary with no-name, "famous" "scientists" quoted out of context, we're supposed to take all of this in and believe it? I have an easier time believing the Bush administration.

A lot of the images have some computer-generated blue grid thing over them, which is supposed to make everything look less real, and make us think something of the film. Yet there's no point. There's also animation that's nothing, really, perhaps going through cyberspace or something of the like? Why, though? Why does What the #$*!? feel like we need to see some unnecessary computer generated animation, with "bubbles" floating up, where we see the "scientists" talking. Is that trendy? No, it's stupid. The one most obnoxious sequence is a bunch of computer-generated blobs that supposedly has human emotions, cursing and singing songs, belching and bulging their eyes. That whole sequence has nothing to do with anything that the movie's trying to say. Note the word "trying".

Every example that What the #$*!? tries to give makes no sense. Supposedly, a Japanese man put a label on a glass of water, saying different things. Somehow, that water crystallized and formed into multi-colored images, displaying the general emotion on the label. Not only does this have no proof, but it's basically an impossibility. Everything else said in the film is far-fetched, but that is plain absurd. This movie has so many radical ideas and is completely new-age, I'm surprised Enya music wasn't playing in the background. After all of this blabbing about impossible things, they then go to mention how God isn't God, but part of a human. As one poster on an IMDb message board said, "I never thought a film could upset scientists, atheists, and theists, but it did." Every example they try to give backfired, and when it gets to religion, everything just gets silly. Maybe if What the #$*!? had been about theories, instead of passing off these theories as fact, then it could have been watchable. They may be interesting theories, but when given as fact with no proof, along with boring "scientists" discussing them, and bad acting in the drama parts, you can't really do what the movie wants you to do. Maybe I'm just a cynic, but a good amount of What the #$*!? just seemed like a science class video. And nobody likes science class videos.

Not Rated

Review Date: October 5, 2004