Thoughts on what girls want
by John Acierto
Why do girls always seem to fall for the wrong guys? Then again, who is the right kind of
guy? Is the right kind of guy the sensitive type? Is he the strong, silent type? Or is he the outgoing,
always speaks his mind type? Maybe even the nonserious, joking type? I'm asking because I, like
so many other guys out there, am still clueless on that one subject that we all strive to understand:
women.
I don't consider myself a genius, not by a long shot. But I am aware of the shortcomings of
many other males of the human species. We are often insensitive, ignorant things. We do very
stupid and embarrassing things not to get good at them, but to impress girls. Now, I'm sure that's
not true of everything we do, but face it. It's mostly true, isn't it? How often do we find ourselves
playing sports or even just walking down the street, looking out for members of the opposite sex?
And when they are spotted, we often times play harder or walk taller to impress them? We may fool
ourselves and think we're only doing it to improve ourselves, but at this point in our lives (e.g.
before marriage), we want to present ourselves as best as possible to get the attention of those
females.
These facts are most evident in our teenage years. In high school, the jocks always got the
girls that all the boys wanted. Why? Because they're popular, immature, and often fun to hang
around with. And that, my friends, is the key to a high school girl's heart: fun. They like to have a
good time. They like to be immature and leave their problems behind, and if they can find a guy
who can do that for them, then that is the guy who will be able to get anywhere with them. This fact
is reinforced even more by the fact that the jocks often times know this already, so they use it to their
advantage, while the rest of us guys are left to figure it out for ourselves.
But, is that what girls really want? A guy who knows how to have fun? From what I've
seen, that is precisely what they want at this stage of their lives. But, not really. When asked, girls
often times say they want a nice guy, a sensitive guy who they can really relate to. However, they
still go out with the jerks. At first, girls seem to be very hypocritical, not practicing what they
preach. But, they do know what they want. They just don't know how to find what they're looking
for. They look in the easiest place to look: right in front of them. If a guy doesn't get their attention
somehow, then they don't pay attention. It's that simple, or at least, it appears that simple.
So, girls are bound to find the ideal guy in the ones that get their attention, right? Sadly
enough, it rarely happens that way. Why? Because the only ones who can get even a glance from
girls are jerks, jocks, and childish guys. These people are nowhere near ideal (though there are a
few out there). However, in the hopes of finding a "nice guy," girls will often go out with the guy
who gets their attention. Or, they go out with the guy who they can have plenty of fun with while
ignoring who they are actually going out with. It is the very manifestation of the saying "ignorance
is bliss." Of course, the girls themselves don't realize their actually doing this.
And so, after a certain time period of going out and maybe even dating a guy, the girl finally
starts looking at who she's actually having a relationship with. She sets aside her ignorance to see if
this guy fits the bill of someone who is fun and, yet, nice and sensitive, all at the same time. She
starts to observe who the guy is and what he's actually doing. The brief period of euphoria is over.
It's time to get serious. And that's when most relationships (in high school) end. At least, that's
when they end from the girls point of view. They looked at the guy they had hoped was the ideal
funster and poet-in-one, but found he was just a shallow creature incapable of fathoming that kind of
relationship.
If the guy was the one to do the dumping, his reasons are, of course, much shallower than the
emotional ones of the girls. He just got bored of the relationship, or the girl, or both. It's that
simple.
Anyway, after ending the relationship, the girl starts this process all over again. Depending
on the girl, this could take only a matter of weeks. For others, this process could take months. But,
either way, it's pretty much the same for every girl. They hope for so much, but very few of the
guys they go for can ever fulfill those hopes.
But there is one huge mistake girls tend to make, and that is the fact that they only look for
the ideal guy in a narrow section of the spectrum. Most of the guys who have a really good chance
of filling their hopes, actual nice guys, are not jocks, or immature, or even noticeable at all. They
can't be seen in front of your nose, yet they are all around. But, alas, they are invisible to the naked
eye because they don't draw attention to themselves.
What's even stranger is that these guys are often times acknowledged by the general
populace as nice guys. So, why don't the desirable girls give them a chance? Because they don't
stand out, they're not immature, they don't appear to know how to have a good time. But, these are
the very guys who are sensitive, thoughtful, and understanding, the traits ideal to the girls looking
for them. And so, they real nice guys are passed up simply because of the fact that they don't catch
the attention of the girls they would like to try having a relationship with.
Don't get me wrong. I know I make this out to be the female's fault. But, it is actually the
fault of both sexes. Here is my conclusion (and my final thoughts for now) in all its glory:
Girls know what they want in a guy. However, most of the time, they don't know where to
look. So they look in the easiest place: in plain site. What they should do is look in all places, not
just what's in front of them, or what gets their attention, but look at the rest of the picture also.
They'd be surprised at what they'd see just by looking.
Guys are stupid. They're too busy trying to impress girls when what they really want is your
real self without all the gimmicks. Yes, we are all nice guys at heart. We often don't want to admit
it, so we hide it behind our masks. Whether we're too shy or we are attention getter, we don't reveal
our true selves right away to the opposite sex. Well, that is what we must strive to do. Shy guys,
break out of this fear that's holding you back from going for that girl. And popular guys, stop trying
to get so much attention from everyone that you forget about showing who you are, because that's
what most girls are really interested in.
Lastly, I apologize for this thing. I do presume to think that I know enough about this
subject to be able to write about it and even formulate a solution to the problem at hand. But, I
could be totally wrong. However, I do hope this little blurb has made you think a little bit about
what is going on out their in the relationship game. Perhaps you will come up with your own
observations from past experiences and hopefully strive to correct whatever it is that's wrong. I have
faith in you, all of you. Don't let me down.