Tell Me Who I Am


Author: Sam

Story: Leather-bound: 8 of ?

Series: n/a

Setting: Rivendell & Lothlorien as seen in The Red Book of Westmarch.

Song Note: The Logical Song by Supertramp. My roommate must be thanked, as she was the one who found this song for me. On a whim, I listened to her suggestion, and found it really did fit Strider. Thank you Roommate!

Feedback: Yes, please? Especially constructive. samwise_baggins@yahoo.co.uk

Webpage: http://www.oocities.org/samwise_baggins/index.html



When I was young, it seemed that life was so wonderful, a miracle; oh, it was beautiful, mliveal. And all the birds in the trees, well they'd be singing so happily, joyfully, playfully, watching me.

Growing up among the Elves, with nothing more than the memory of an image of a man called gather, must have been like living in a dream. Fostered by Lord Elrond of Imladris, raised closely by the Lord's twin sons, Elladan and Elrohir, and guided ever gently by Gilean as a mother, must have been pure delight. With such a peaceful, delightful upbringing among Elven poetry and song, how could a man once called Estel... Hope... become the deadly warrior known as Strider?

But then they sent me away to teach me how to be sensible, logical, responsible, practical. And they showed me a world where I could be so dependable, clinical, intellectual, cynical.

Apparently it started with the twins themselves. They would take young Estel out hunting with them. Naturally, as the sons of Elrond were on a personal vendetta against all things Orcish, Estel learned to capture and kill more than a night's supper; he learned to stalk, track, and ambush.

Such facts could not be kept long from the ears of the Lord of Imladris. He was proud of Estel's triumphs, allowing his foster son to develop into a strong warrior... a rugged man.

On the eve of his twentieth year, Estel was led into Elrond's private chambers.

There are times when all the world's asleep, the questions run too deep for such a simple man. Won't you please, please tell me what we've learned? I know it sounds absurd but please tell me who I am.

"Estel, you have displayed great cunning, great valor, on the field of battle."

Unsmiling the young man bowed his head and shoulders, replying to his foster father in a deep rasp, so unexpected among the gentle voiced Elves. "I could do no less than my brothers, father. It is their teaching which shows me the way."

Elrond nodded and moved gracefully from behind his hand-carved desk. Silently, he filled two glasses with the delicate wine famous in the House of Elrond. He paused, then turned and offered one crystal goblet to his foster son.

Estel took the glass and sipped courteously. Savoring the light taste, the man watched as the Elf strode slowly, silently, to one of the vast windows. He remained unsmiling, quiet, as he watched.

Finally, with a gentle sigh, Elrond turned and sipped his on wine. His voice barely seemed to disturb the air, despite its rich, resonant timbre. He did not take his eyes off the dark-haired youth he'd come to love as one of his own children.

"Your name is Aragorn, son of Arathorn, heir of Isildur." Without waiting for a reaction, the Elf Lord went on to explain how he had would up with a Human woman and child in his protection. It was many long minutes before he finished his tale of the boy's origins and his long hidden destiny.

With much to ponder, filled with a sense of wonder and no little self-importance, the newly re-christianed Aragorn left his foster father's chambers. He quickly slipped into his room to continue his serious though, unnoticing the bustle as several riders from Lothlorien were announced.

It was the next night, at sunset, when he met the almost mystical beauty Arwen Undomiel, daughter of Elrond. The young man was surprised by this beautiful Elf, as he had been unaware that his foster father even had a daughter. Recalling an ancient legend concerning the love of a mortal man and an immortal Elf maid, Aragorn started a conversation with the bemused woman. As if fated to do so, the two became close immediately, that closeness turning into love within days.

Now watch what you say or they'll be calling you a radical, liberal, fanatical, criminal.

Elrond found out about his daughter and foster son. Unsettled, he knew what was coming, had seen it, and knew, also, that the relationship was doomed from the start. In a confrontation with Aragorn, the Lord forbade their love, telling the young man that he would need to be a King of Kings to be a worthy husband for the beautiful Arwen.

Aragorn left Rivendell to join the rangers and prove his worth, denying his royal destiny.

While in his dangerous travels. The Human took on a new name: Strider. He met with an elderly Wizard calling himself Gandalf the Gray. Over the next thirty years, Gandalf's friendship would prove invaluable to the maturing heir of Isildur, once King of Gondor. Strider's later encounters would also include a pathetic, twisted being named Gollum needing tracking and capture, something the young ranger finally managed.

Upon arriving in Lothlorien, home of Galadriel and Celeborn, grandparents of Arwen, Strider once again encountered the beautiful Elf maid. Their love was as great as before, and the couple spent long, happy hours among the trees of the Elvish abode. As time came for Strider to leave, his love pledged to marry him and no one else. Into his hands she placed the Evenstar, a rare gem alight with the soul of ages of Elves, said to be one of the three stars forged for the Elves and later presented to a beautiful Elf main by her devoted mortal lover. It was a precious trust which Strider felt he didn't deserve, though he could not find the strength to deny it, either.

Won't you sign up your name? We'd like to feel you're acceptable, respectable, presentable, a vegetable!

Elrond again refused their union upon finding that the pair still yearned for one another. This time, he was direct and very harsh. He informed his former ward of the coming doom to Elves and Men, highlighting the fact that in a few short years, Elves would no longer grace the shores of Middle Earth.

"My daughter will sail with her kin, my son. If you persist in this dream, you will only hurt her all the more." Elrond sighed, tired and worn, looking over the mature features of the Man standing before him. "Pursue her no longer... I must insist."

"The decision is for Arwen alone. She chooses to stay out of hope."

"She chooses to stay out of love for you." The Elf's voice grew harsh once more. "I cannot allow her to sacrifice herself in the ageless grief of an Elf trapped in mortal surroundings. You would have her watch you die, diminishing in grief and pain as the world ages and all things good and beautiful are wiped from it. I cannot allow that. Especially for none less than a man who would accept his destiny, his duty... for one who would turn from his heritage. You cannot ask her to do the same."

Strider had never really wanted to be a King of Kings, despite his ancestry. He preferred the Elven people to his own, and to accept his heritage, to rule as the heir of Isildur, would feel as if it were stifling his inner self. It would feel as if it was cutting him off from the land and people he loved so dearly. No... he could not find it in himself to be Man rather than Elfkind, despite the blood which flowed in his veins.

It would take something of great import to change his direction, even as his love for Arwen did not. It would take the threat of the entire world, Elves and Men alike, to bring Strider to his own... to return Aragorn once more to the land of Middle Earth.

At night, when all the world's asleep, the questions run so deep for such a simple man. Won't you please, please tell me what we've learned? I know it sounds absurd but please tell me who I am.


To Be Continued in Chapter Nine: What He Needs




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