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BECAUSE I'M TIRED OF IT TOO
Can't wash it all away… Can't Wish it all away… Can't hope it all away… Can't cry it all away…
The pain that grips you The fear that binds you Releases life in me In our mutual Shame we idolize To blind them from the truth That finds a way from who we are Please don't be afraid When the darkness fades away The dawn will break the silence Screaming in our hearts My love for you still grows This I do for you Before I try to fight the truth my final time
"We're supposed to try and be real. And I feel alone, and we're not together. And that is real."
Can't wash it all away… Can't wish it all away… Can't cry it all away… Can't scratch it all away…
Lying beside you Listening to you breathe The life that flows inside of you Burns inside of me Hold and speak to me Of love without a sound Tell me you will live through this And I will die for you Cast me not away Say you'll be with me For I know I cannot Bear it all alone
"You're not alone, are you?" "Never... Never."
Can't fight it all away… Can't hope it all away… Can't scream it all away… It just won't fade away, No…
Can't wash it all away… Can't wish it all away… Can't cry it all away… Can't scratch it all away…
Can't fight it all away… Can't hope it all away… Can't scream it all away…
"That was absolutely great Fujima-san! And you did it with only one take" his producer, Shojo showed him the thumbs up as he lazily took off his earphones.
Fujima walked out of the recording studio and accidentally bumped into a large group of fan girls. He smiled a little as they took shots of him and unwilling obliged to signing a couple of autographs.
He saw someone at a distance, standing by the phone booth, watching him. Fujima squinted to get a better look. That unmistakable spiky hair… that board shoulders… that grin…the smile that he feel in love with… "Akira…"
***
"How are you?"
"I’m ok…"
"That’s great…"
"Kenji… I’m sorry… I…" Fujima placed his index finger on Sendoh’s lips. Silencing him.
"No… don’t apologize." he smiled. He loved Sendoh. He loved just looking into his eyes as he used to back in high school. He leaned forward as kissed Sendoh lightly on those luscious lips.
"Mmmm…" "I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have…" Fujima blushed when he realized what he had done and was trying his best to avoid Sendoh’s gaze. Sendoh lifted his chin, forcing Fujima to intertwine with his gaze…
"I missed you…" Sendoh said as he captured Fujima’s lips, devouring them inch by inch as he savored every moment, every taste. He tired not to blink, wanting to captured all the images in his head before they disappear. Sendoh broke the kiss when he felt Fujima trying to catch his breath.
"Hey… lets go to that coffee place and catch up on old times" Sendoh hands automatically found their way to Fujima’s as they grab them like they were accustomed to.
***
"So after you left, I stopped playing basketball and concentrated on singing instead. I found it a good way to release my emotions... My feelings…"
"And I guess… most of the time you were singing about me?" Sendoh grinned knowing the answer to his question but forcing his partner to answer.
"Don’t flatter yourself, Sendoh Akira." Fujima blushed profusely under his gaze.
"So its not about me then?" Sendoh looked hurt and yet teasingly mischievous.
"Of course it is, who else would it be about?" Sendoh smiled, this time sincerely as he held the shorter boy’s hands.
"I love you, Fujima Kenji… I always have…" Fujima looked at Sendoh. There were so many questions to ask and yet they don’t seem to want to come out. He wanted to know why Sendoh left in the first place but him being here was far more important then why he left.
***
"Its late… I should send you home." They were strolling, hand in hand towards Sendoh’s apartment. No matter how much Sendoh insisted on seeing him home, Fujima refused for some unknown reason..
"I’ll see you tomorrow?" Fujima eyes sparkled, watching Sendoh give his prominent grin and nodded to Fujima’s question. Fujima send him some flying kisses as he slowly walked his way back.
***
"Shojo… I won’t be coming in today. I have some other appointment. I’ll come tomorrow though and I have a new song to record. Just wrote it yesterday night. Yea … ok! See you tomorrow then…" Fujima then grabbed his coat and left his apartment to meet his love interest.
***
"Sendoh Akira?" the man at the door asked him again.
"Yea… he was here yesterday." Fujima was confused. No wait, the man at the door was also confused.
"This is unit 700 right?" Fujima looked around his surroundings. They were the same as yesterday… right? Did he get the wrong address.
"Yes. I am Sendoh Aki, Akira’s brother."
"That’s great then, can you tell Sendoh, Fujima Kenji is here?" Fujima rubbed his hands together because it was getting pretty chilly outside.
"Ah… Fujima Kenji… please come in." Sendoh Aki, lead Fujima into his house and asked if he would like a cup of coffee. Fujima instantly declined and looked puzzled as Sendoh Aki took a seat in front of him.
"Aren’t you going to get Akira?" "That’s what I want to talk to you about… Sendoh died a year ago in a car accident."
"He WHAT? But I just saw him yesterday. I had coffee with him. I even kissed him."
"That can’t be right Fujima-san. He died a year ago in front of Shojo & Co."
*** mou hitori de arukenai toki no kaze ga tsuyosugite Ah kizutsuku koto nante nareta kazu dakedo ima wa...
I can't walk any further alone The winds of time are too strong Ah There were so many times I was hurt but now...
Ah kono mama dakishimete fureta mama no kokoro o kawaritsuzukeru kono toki ni kawaranai ai ga aru nara
Ah Hold me like this Hold my trembling heart In this continually changing time If there's a never-changing love
Will you hold my heart namida uketomete mou kowaresou na All my heart
Will you hold my heart And catch my tears It seems I've already broken down All my heart
Forever Love Forever Dream afureru omoi dake ga hageshiku setsunaku jikan o umetsukusu Oh Tell me why
Forever Love Forever Dream Only the overflowing memories are Furiously, painfully stopping up time Oh Tell me why
All I see is blue in my heart
Will you stay with me kaze ga sugisaru made mata afuredasu All my tears
Will you stay with me Until the wind has passed by They're still overflowing All my tears
Forever Love Forever Dream kono mama soba ni ite yoake ni furueru kokoro o dakishimete Oh Stay with me
Forever Love Forever Dream Stay close like this In the dawn, embrace my trembling heart Oh Stay with me
Ah subete ga owareba ii owari no nai kono yoru ni Ah ushinau mono nante nanimonai anata dake
Ah Everything should end In this endless night Ah What have I lost Nothing Only you
Forever Love Forever Dream kono mama soba ni ite yoake ni furueru kokoro o dakishimete
Forever Love Forever Dream Stay close like this In the dawn, embrace my trembling heart
Ah Will you stay with me kaze ga sugisaru made mou dare yori mo soba ni
Ah Will you stay with me Until the wind has passed by More than anyone else, stay close
Forever Love Forever Dream kore ijou arukenai Oh Tell me why Oh Tell me true oshiete ikiru imi o
Forever Love Forever Dream I can't walk any further than this Oh Tell me why Oh Tell me true Tell me the meaning of life
Forever Love Forever Dream afureru namida no naka kagayaku kisetsu ga eien ni kawaru made Forever Love
Forever Love Forever Dream Until inside of overflowing tears The shimmering season changes into eternity Forever Love
***
"That’s gonna be a hit Fujima-san" Shojo exclaimed as he applauded in the sound proof studio.
"That’s my last song Shojo-san."
***
"But the answer is always there. Nothing is ever really forgotten."
"Because I'm tired of it too."
"Because I'm tired of it too."
"Because I'm tired of it too." |