When his private phone rang, he wasn't sure what he'd expected. Whatever it was, it wasn't...this.

"...and he told me that he kissed T-um, another boy. So can you test Kon for the Gay?"

"Clark, are you serious?" Bruce asked. He could feel his temple starting to throb.

"Of course." He sounded offended. "I'm just afraid that after he kissed T-um...that other boy, he might have...the Gay."

Bruce counted to twenty in Dutch. "Clark..."

"Please, Bruce? There's no one else I can ask to do this."

Bruce thought about sighing heavily. Decided against it. "Send him over this evening. Six o'clock."

"Thanks. You're a real friend."

Bruce hung up and went to find an aspirin.

At six sharp, Kon arrived. He looked ridiculously nervous.

"Um. Clark said I should come see you about...you know." He lowered his voice to a whisper. "The Gay."

Bruce valiantly suppressed an irritated eyebrow twitch.

"So how do we find out if I have the Gay?" Kon asked.

Bruce paused for a moment to regroup. Then he asked, "Do you have sexual feelings for other boys?"

"...Yes?"

"Do you have sexual feelings for girls?"

"...Yes?"

"You're probably bisexual, Kon."

The boy just looked confused.

He couldn't stop the twitch this time. Kon didn't seem to notice, as he was busy looking anywhere but at Bruce.

"Then does T-um, the guy I kissed have the Gay?"

"I don't know."

"Oh." His brow knit with worry. "Then what about-"

"Go home, Conner," Bruce said sternly.

After patrol that night, when Bruce and Tim were changing out of their costumes, he paused and looked at the boy. "So. Kon?"

"Yeah."

"Hn."