Gar had just settled in on the couch with popcorn and a movie when a rush of air rocked him sideways. Bart was suddenly sitting next to him, fidgeting.

"Um...what's up?" Gar ventured.

Bart bit his lip. "We're friends, right?"

"Of course."

"And you'd do me a favor if I needed your help?"

"Bart, are you in trouble?"

"No!" Bart shook his head and scooted closer. He was practically in Gar's lap. "But you would, right? Do me a favor?"

"Yeah..."

"Good." Bart vibrated in relief for a moment. "We need to have sex."

"I-what?"

"We need to have sex," Bart repeated. He must have actually registered the confusion on Gar's face, because he started to explain. "Everyone says that I'm inexperienced and have trouble applying what I learn to real life. That gets pretty annoying because I really am getting better about it, even if nobody has noticed it at all, and that's annoying, too. Anyway, it's just a matter of getting the experience to apply my knowledge to, and so I wanted to get some experience and practice practical application in sex. But I can't do it with a civilian because of my powers, and I can't ask any of the girls because I don't want to risk getting anyone pregnant, and Vic's not really my type, and Tim said no, and Kon turned this funny shade of purple when I asked him, so you're the logical choice."

Gar blinked a couple of times and rubbed his temple. "Bart, I don't even...we can't...it's not... Jesus."

"Please say yes."

"No," Gar said firmly. "We can't."

"Please?"

"No." Gar got up, abandoning his popcorn, and walked out.

Bart followed. "Please?"

It was pointless to run away from a speedster, but it made him feel like he was doing something. "No."

Bart followed him around for the rest of Friday night and most of Saturday. By the end of the day, Gar was beyond sick of the words "please" and "no." He was half tempted to morph into a bat and hide in a dark corner all night, but Bart didn't sleep long. He'd hunt Gar down anyway. Instead, Gar waited until Bart was distracted by the pizza Tim and Kon had ordered, and he slipped off to his bedroom. Hopefully, he could feign sleep, and Bart would leave him alone for a while.

When he opened his door, though, Bart was on his bed. Naked. Bart was naked on his bed.

"Bart, what the hell?"

"Please, Gar. I can't ask anyone else."

"You can't ask me." He closed the door and leaned back against it. "Why sex? Why now?"

"Because we're heroes, and life is short, and you never know what's going to happen the next time you turn around. We could...we could get blown up by aliens or shot by a gangbanger or taken down by Batman, and I don't want to die a virgin. Also, I've been reading a lot about sex and sexuality, and I need a basis for comparison."

"Bart, put your clothes back on and get out," Gar said. He focused his gaze on the far window and steadily ignored the fact that he could smell Bart, and he smelled like need. He heard Bart shifting around.

"Do...do you think I'm ugly?" he asked, sounding something like a cross between horrified and about to cry. "Is that why you won't have sex with me?"

Gar stared at him in surprise. "Jesus, no! I don't think you're ugly, Bart. I just...fuck. That's a pretty lousy reason-and for future reference, don't tell anyone you're using them as a test case." He made sure that the door was firmly shut, then went to the bed and stretched out with his back against the headboard and held a hand out. "Now come here."

Bart disappeared and reappeared next to him with his jeans on. Gar manhandled him a little so that Bart was in his lap. He then wrapped his arms around Bart and rubbed his back while he thought about how he should explain himself.

"Isn't this what they call sending mixed signals?" Bart asked.

"Yes. Now hush and let me figure out how I can be less of a bastard about this."

"You could say yes," Bart muttered.

Gar pinched his side a little. Then Bart pinched him back, and that started a brief wrestling match. They ended up sprawled sideways across the bed, breathless with laughter. Bart lay on Gar's chest. As they calmed down, he reached out and hesitantly twined his left hand with Gar's right.

Gar squeezed Bart's hand lightly and sighed. He probably ought to quit being so affectionate, because it was sending mixed signals, but Bart was good to touch, warm, with that low-level hum of energy under his skin that was present even at rest. He was good-looking, too, honestly. And he smelled delicious. And...this really wasn't helping the whole "stop this and explain why no means no" thing.

"Okay, this is the deal," he said finally. "This is kinda flattering in a...bizarre, confusing sort of way, but there are a lot of reasons it's not going to happen. For one, it's illegal. Two, there are about forty-twelve people who'd kill me if they thought I hurt you. Three-and this is a big one-we're not in love. You shouldn't have sex with anyone you don't love."

"But I do love you," Bart protested. "You're my friend, and I trust you, and we care about each other."

"Let me rephrase, then. You shouldn't have sex with anyone you're not in love with."

"Lots of people do it, though."

"You're not people," Gar said, squeezing Bart's hand again. "You're you, and you are too good for empty sex. Especially your first time."

Bart sat up, looking frustrated. "It wouldn't be empty. You're not some random body. I know you won't hurt me, and... I don't care about that other stuff. Nobody has to know."

"Tim and Kon will know," Gar pointed out. He sat up as well and looked at Bart seriously. "Having sex with someone who doesn't love you-who isn't in love with you. It will always hurt you."

He thought maybe he'd finally gotten through, because Bart frowned and stared down at the bed for a long time.

"I need to go think," Bart announced a few minutes later.

He zipped off, leaving Gar cold and wishing he didn't miss the gentle buzz of Bart's body against his.

For most of the day Sunday, Bart was nowhere to be found. Kon looked at Gar suspiciously for asking after Bart and said he was reading in his room. Gar spent the day keeping busy with anything he could find, including paperwork and laundry. Even dealing with dirty socks and underwear was better than letting himself hunt Bart down for...he didn't really know.

It was in the laundry room that Bart found him that night, just before he had to leave to go back to Keystone. Gar was taking his last load of clothes out of the dryer when Bart appeared in front of him.

"I spent a really long time thinking about it and reading and thinking some more, and I think I'm in love with you," he said. Then he leaned in, planted his hands on Gar's face, and kissed the hell out of him. "And I'm going to make you fall in love with me."

Gar was alone a second later, holding a t-shirt and staring stupidly at the door.