The Complexity of Emotion by scheherezhad
Rating: G
Summary: Loving is complicated.
Disclaimer: Don't own, not making money, please don't sue.
Author's notes: Five connected vignettes about the L-word. A belated birthday present for my fellow June babies, Sonnet and Kelly.
Feedback: Pleeease? scheherezhad@yahoo.com


I.

Kuwabara had just hit 'reply' on his email when his bedroom door opened. "I'm busy, sis," he said without looking up from his laptop.

"That's nice, but I'm going out for a while, and you have a visitor." Shizuru stepped aside, and Urameshi sauntered in.

"What's up?"

Kuwabara grunted a reply and went back to typing. Urameshi was probably just here to get away from Keiko. Or possibly he'd done something stupid and was hiding from Kurama. Either way, this wasn't the best hiding spot. They'd both check here first.

"Don't get blood on anything while I'm gone, boys," Shizuru said lightly as she turned to leave.

"Scout's honor," Urameshi replied cheekily, saluting her. She just flicked his ear and laughed when he yelped.

Kuwabara curled his lip and glared at the keyboard. His own sister was nicer to his best friend than she was to him.

"So what're you doing? Looking at porn?" Urameshi asked, flopping down on the bed.

"No, you perv, I'm writing an email."

"A sexy email?"

"Shut up." He threw an empty soda can at the other boy. "It's to Mitarai."

Urameshi pulled out a pack of cigarettes. "Oh, so it is a sexy email. How long have you been stringing this guy along now?"

That finally made him turn around. Urameshi shook out a cigarette, lit it, took a drag. Watching the process stopped Kuwabara from yelling like he'd been about to do. "I'm not stringing anybody anywhere. Me and Mitarai are just friends."

"Please." Urameshi snorted, and a wisp of smoke slithered from his nose like a dragon. "The guy has had it bad for you since you saved his scrawny ass. Said you were the first person who'd ever done anything nice for him."

"You're delusional."

"Oh, come on. Everyone saw how he looked at you and followed you around like a puppy. And I bet his emails are really girly, too." He pitched his voice higher in imitation of Mitarai. "Dear Kuwabara-kun, I'm so happy you wrote me. How are you? How's your family? I wish we could go to the park this weekend if you have time."

Kuwabara angrily closed his laptop. He wasn't about to admit that that was uncomfortably close to the way Mitarai's emails sounded. "If I'm leading Mitarai on, you're a million times worse with Kurama."

Urameshi went still. "What?"

"Talk about stringing somebody along," Kuwabara said, knowing he'd hit a nerve. "You knew each other, what? Two days? And you tried to pull a Romeo and Juliet. Even Keiko knows that he's been in love with you since then. He'd do anything for you if you asked. You're always hanging around together, and you're all touchy-feely. Should I keep going?"

"It's not...like that."

"Yeah. It is."

"Fuck off," Urameshi said, rolling to his feet. "I'm outta here."

Kuwabara opened his laptop up and looked at Mitarai's email again. "Yeah, Urameshi. It's exactly that way."


II.

"Hello?"

"Keiko?"

"Yusuke? It's almost midnight. Why are you calling so late?"

"Keiko, do I...does... Is Kurama in love with me?"

"...Do you think he is?"

"...I-Look, just forget I called."


III.

They have an understanding, she and Kurama. Keiko knows how easily Kurama could seduce Yusuke if he tried. He and Yusuke have more in common than the rest of the group gives them credit for. She and Yusuke have far less. But she's known Yusuke the longest, and he proposed to her. That makes him hers for now, plain and simple. Kurama won't interfere unless Yusuke comes to him.

Keiko hates him for that, just a little.

It would make her feel better if Kurama would compete with her. That way she'd know. She'd know if Yusuke was really with her because he loved her best, or if he was only with her because he didn't know yet that he loved Kurama, too.


IV.

Love is disgustingly like taking a sword to the gut.

Youko has long rebelled against the emotion, but Shuuichi embraces it completely. The moment Kurama met Yusuke Urameshi, really met him, Youko knew he didn't stand a chance.

Kurama doesn't consider the brief encounter in the woods to be their first meeting. Not even their long talk on the roof of the hospital. The moment he first met Yusuke, knew what he was about and who he was deep down, was when Yusuke knelt beside him and demanded that the mirror take his life instead of Kurama's.

He took Hiei's sword for Yusuke as a thank-you. It was the only way he knew how to say it. He takes Yusuke's oblivious friendliness as his due. It's no less than he deserves after all the pain that Youko caused in his hundreds of years.

His complacency bothers Keiko, as well it should. Both of them know that he could take Yusuke from her, how simple it would be to convince Yusuke that their friendship is something more. But he won't. He wants Yusuke to realize it himself. Even if it takes him a year, a decade, a century to figure it out, Kurama will wait.

He's very good at waiting.


V.

It wasn't, perhaps, the best time for Mitarai to run into anyone he knew. Especially not Kurama. They'd happened to run into one another a few times over the years and had held pleasant, if brief, conversations each time. It was exactly the sort of thing that Mitarai didn't want to face right now, but his train wouldn't arrive for another five minutes.

"Hello, Mitarai-kun."

"Good afternoon, Minamino-san," he said carefully. "How have you been?"

"Very well, thank you. And you?"

"I'm-" Something in Kurama's eyes stopped the automatic assurance from passing his lips. "I've been better," he admitted.

Kurama nodded. "You've spoken with Kuwabara-kun."

"Yes." He felt blood rush to his face. Did all of Kuwabara-san's friends know what had happened? "He was very polite. He said that he still wants to be friends." Mitarai stared down at his shoes. "It was my own fault. I knew all along that he didn't share my feelings, but I still hoped..."

A strong but gentle hand settled on his shoulder, and Mitarai looked up.

"The heart wants what it wants, Kiyoshi. Don't be ashamed of that. Just treasure what you have."

The train pulled up, and the crowd jostled past Mitarai and Kurama on the platform.

"I should go. I hope I see you again soon, Minamino-san."

"Goodbye, Mitarai-kun."

Mitarai walked a few steps, then took a deep breath and turned around. "You don't have to settle, Kurama. Tell him how you feel."

He turned back around and ran, making it onto the train just as the doors were closing. Kurama stood on the platform with a very tiny smile, and Mitarai smiled back.