"There you go, Mr. President, you're very lucky you didn't lose your eye. But you'll be as good as new in no time."

Jed looked in the small mirror he'd been handed to see the stitched wound that ran from the edge of his eye, over his temple, to his hairline. "Will there be a scar?"

"Nope. Maybe a small one at first but it will fade."

"Damn."

"You WANTED a scar?" Leo asked.

"I thought it might make me look sort of rakish, and sexy."

"You're already rakish and sexy, Mr. President." CJ assured him as she entered the room.

Jed turned to look at CJ and his face tightened. Coming through the door right behind her were two doctors, one of them the doctor he had spoken with earlier. Both were grim faced and Jed felt his heart begin to race.

"Abbey?"

The doctors gave each other sidelong glances as if neither wanted to be the one to pass on bad news. Finally, Dr. Stewart, who had spoken with him earlier, bit the bullet and stepped forward. Jed felt Leo and CJ move in close on each side, as if to bolster him.

"Sir, I'm afraid the news is not good. …"

Leo's grip tightened on his friend's arm and Jed heard CJ's soft intake of breath but all he could feel was a mind numbing sense of disbelief, a certainty that it wasn't possible that that this was happening. He had no way of knowing the deathly pallor his face had taken, didn't feel the slight stagger that caused the doctors to reach for him.

"No." He held them off. "I'm okay, what's wrong with Abbey?"

"Sir, your wife's white blood cell count was through the roof which led us to believe that she was suffering from appendicitis. A physical examination and a laparoscopy has confirmed this diagnosis."

"So, she wasn't pregnant. Thank God." The relief in Jed's voice was almost palpable as he gave thanks that Abbey was not going to have to deal, yet again, with the toll of losing a child, or the ramifications of having to abort that child.

"Sir, this isn't good news. Well…" he amended at seeing the President's frown. "Of course it's good news that we aren't dealing with an ectopic pregnancy here, but Mrs. Bartlet is still a very sick woman."

"Yes, but its just appendicitis. People don't die of appendicitis." Jed tried to sound confidant but there was a slight need for reassurance in his voice.

"No, they die of the massive infection that is spread when the appendix has burst."

"Abbey's appendix burst?" Jed swallowed, his earlier relief completely gone.

"I'm afraid so. She's being prepped for an emergency appendectomy as we speak. As her next of kin we need you to sign the release form."

Jed glanced down at the clipboard he had been handed with that same sense of unreality washing over him. He tried to focus on the words but they all blended into one big blur. He knew that in signing that release he was accepting responsibility for his wife's surgery. "Just how bad off is she?" Jed's tone might have been flat but the naked anguish in his eyes was evident for all to see. "Is she going to die?"

"Now, sir, let's not move that far ahead. Mrs Bartlet has a lot of things going for her. She's a strong woman and she's in great health…"

"But" Jed interjected; knowing the but was coming.

"But we just don't know how severe the damage is to her system, we won't know until we open her up. A ruptured appendix is nothing to mess with and she went an awfully long time before getting treatment."

Jed glanced back down at the clipboard and accepted the pen the doctor held out to him. With shaking fingers and a feeling of dread he signed his name. "Why do I feel like I just signed her death warrant?"

"Not signing that release would have been the death warrant, sir." Dr. Stewart turned to leave, then turned back when he realized that he had forgotten something. He reached into his pocket and handed Abbey's wedding rings to Jed. Jed held them in his open palm, staring down at them through blurry eyes and swallowing hard past the lump in his throat. In his hand he held the diamond engagement ring he'd placed on Abbey's finger with such unbelievable love and joy the day that he had asked her to marry him, along with her two wedding bands. The simple delicate gold band he'd slipped on her finger when they had stood before their family, friends and God, and he had pledged his fidelity to her, and, the more ornate one that he'd given her to celebrate their 20th wedding anniversary, this one with their initials engraved with tiny diamonds. He felt CJ's hand gently close over his elbow and they both gave a startled jump when the doors crashed open and the gurney that held Abbey was wheeled out into the hall. Doctors shouted orders, nurses pushed along IV poles and the sense of urgency was unmistakable.

Jed rushed forward, reaching her side in just a few strides. "Please, can I just have a moment?'

Knowing this might very well be the last time he saw his wife alive the doctor gave a quick nod. "Just a moment." He warned.

Jed took Abbey's hand, the hand that had worn his rings, the symbols of the love that he had for her, that proclaimed to the world that she was his. The pale band around her ring finger where the sun never touched was a stark reminder of the strength and length of the bond that they shared. He gently ran his finger over the bare skin there unable to shake the feeling of the utter wrongness of it. He gazed down intently at her face memorizing the gentle curve of her cheek, the smattering of freckles on her nose, the graceful arch of her brow, the soft flutter of her dark lashes against her pale skin. He had to choke back a sob when he realized just what he was doing, that he was trying with everything that he had to burn every pore of her into his memory so that he would never forget her. He brought her hand to his lips fighting for control of his emotions. "I'm right here with you, baby. I'm going to be right here waiting for you. You're a fighter, Abigail Bartlet," his eyes were burning with tears now. "You gotta fight this and come back to me. You're the only one who can call me a jackass and get away with it. I need you, Abs, and I love you…I love you so damn much. Don't you dare leave me…" A tear began to trail it's way Jed's cheek and he didn't care who saw it.

"Sir…" Dr. Stewart gently pulled the First Lady's hand away from the President's lips and before Jed knew it he was watching her disappear, yet again, through the “emergency personnel only” doors. He stood alone, staring forlornly at the closed doors until CJ and Leo both approached him.

"I don't know where to go…what to do." Jed looked around the room at a complete loss as to what came next. CJ felt a frission of fear tingle down her spine. She'd never seen the President looking quite so lost. "The chapel. I need to find the chapel."

"Sir." Leo handed him a cell phone. "I think you better make some phone calls first. This is all over the news. Your family must be frantic."

Jed stared at the phone in his hand. The girls, Abbey's parents, how could he have forgotten about them? "I…I didn't even think…"

"It's okay, sir." CJ rubbed his arm. She didn't like how pale he was; the shock of Abbey's condition on top of his head wound had left him less than steady. "Why don't you sit down."

"Would it be easier for you if I call them?" Leo asked. He really didn't know if Jed was up to making those calls or not.

"No, if you call they'll really be worried. I'll do it."

CJ, Leo and Ron watched the President mentally pull himself together long enough to reassure his daughters that their mother was going to be just fine. It wasn't quite so easy with Abbey's parents. Being a physician himself, Dr. Michael O'Neill knew just what kind of trouble his little girl was in and there was nothing Jed could say to make him feel better. If not for the fact that they were still in the midst of a hurricane, Jed knew that the hospital would have soon been overtaken with hordes of worried Bartlet's and O' Neill's. With his phone calls done, he visibly sagged, then, with a deep breath; he stood asking for the chapel. When Leo began to follow him he turned.

"I really appreciate all your support here today, both of you, but I'd really like to pray by myself for a while." Both acquiesced to his request and stood back to watch him make his way down the hall, hands shoved into his pockets, shoulders hunched, looking for all the world like a man who'd just had a burden heavier than he could bear dumped unceremoniously on his back.

"I don't like seeing him like this," CJ said, with a worried frown. "Do you really think he should be alone?" She might have gotten very close to the President and the First Lady, but when it really came down to knowing the Bartlet's she always deferred to Leo's better judgement.

Leo thought for a moment of his best friend's deeply held religious convictions and his belief in the power of prayer. He knew the conversation that Jed would have with God would be deeply personal as much as he knew that he was going to end up pleading for his wife's life. He would absolutely hate for anyone to see him breaking down. Jed Bartlet was a rock; he didn't break down, at least not often and certainly not in front of anyone other than his family. "He needs to do this alone. Go give your briefing, I'll check on him in a bit."

"Are you going to call Hoynes? The President's in no shape to…"

"Yes, I'm calling Hoynes." Leo looked down at his cell phone messages. Josh, Sam, Toby, Charlie, Margaret, Mallory, Jordan…Jordan?" Why did that name make him uneasy? Damn. He was supposed to be on a flight back to DC at that moment to take her to a dinner where she was receiving an award.

"Anything important?" CJ asked.

Leo paused a bit. "Naw, just the guys checking up on us."

CJ nodded and made her way toward the press briefing room, while Leo placed calls to his senior staffers and to John Hoynes. He did not call Jordan, an omission that did not take long to come back and bite him in the butt. Sitting in a corner of the waiting room he was returning and fielding a myriad of phone calls. In the midst of calls to and from the White House and State Department a lone personal call made it's way through.

"Jordan?" That one word was expressed with surprise and a bit of irritation. How dare she bother him now?

"I know you got my message, Leo. I just got off the phone with Margaret. Why didn't you call me back?" Shades of Jenny's " Jed called Abbey, why couldn't you call me" grated on Leo's nerves.

"Believe it or not I've been a little busy up here."

"Don't use that sarcasm on me, Leo. You could have dropped me a quick call to let me know what was going on. What? Did you think I would begrudge you staying up there at the bedside of the woman you love." It was a low blow but his attitude had pissed her off.

"Jordan, Abbey Bartlet is in surgery right now. The doctors are trying to stave off a massage infection that could kill her. Still want to make snide comments?"

"I wasn't being snide. Believe it or not, I'm worried about her and I would have understood you staying up there. Even if you weren't in love with Abbey your place would be with the President right now. I had just hoped that you might care enough to drop me a line and keep me updated, to feel bad and apologize for missing my big night. I guess I was expecting just a little too much out of you. Good bye, Leo, please give the President my best and let him know my prayers are with he and Abbey."

"Jordan…Jordan" He glared at the phone as he realized he was talking to dead air. Damn, now he was left feeling like a complete and utter heel, just as he had all those times Jenny had laid a guilt trip on him. He knew he should have called her, but she was right. He'd been consumed with worry about Abbey's condition and hadn't given Jordan a second thought. Truth be told, if he hadn't seen her message on his phone he would never have even remembered he was supposed to see her tonight. When he had seen her message it had been easier to ignore it than to call her and get into an argument over his feelings for Abbey. He knew he should be more upset by the phone call than he was, but all he could think about was Abbey laying on that operating table fighting for her life. Tears filled his eyes and he brushed away at them angrily before getting to his feet to go and find the President.

****

Jed kneeled in the first pew in the chapel; his shoulders slumped over, his hands clasped in prayer. He'd done everything the way he'd been taught. There was a comfort in routine. He'd lit a candle for his wife's recovery and tried to lose himself in the familiar litany of the decades of the rosary. But his mind was not on the prayers that he was reciting; instead it was on his wife and what signs he might have missed that would have indicated that she was ill. He thought of her in her black bikini, head thrown back to the sun, the wind blowing her hair back off her shoulders. He thought of the romantic dinner they'd shared in Bar Harbor and how he had made love to her back on their boat. He wracked his brain trying to remember some moment, a facial expression that might have indicated that she was in pain, but he simply drew a blank. She had been just as passionate and eager as she always was. The first clue that anything was wrong had been the night they had dined with CJ on the cliffs. Why hadn't he questioned her more about the pain? Why had she just brushed it off? Dr. Stewart's words haunted him, 'she went an awfully long time without treatment.

"Dammit, Abbey," he muttered. "If only we'd gotten you here sooner." Jed gazed down at the rosary still linked in his fingers but gave up on formal prayer. Instead, he closed his eyes and turned his prayers inward, making personal contact with his God. He tried to be unselfish, tried to pray the way that he'd been taught, the way he'd taught his children to pray, to ask for strength in accepting God's will. He tried to give himself over to God's will, but if God's will meant taking his wife he wasn't sure that was something that he was going to be able to bear.

"I'm trying really hard, God. I'm trying to understand why this is happening, but I can't. I just can't. Abbey is such a good person, but I guess You already know that. She's needed here, God. I'm not coming to you selfishly. A year and a half ago you blessed us with two beautiful, healthy babies. I can't believe that in Your infinite wisdom you allowed those children to be conceived only to take their mother away from them before they could even really know her. They're just babies, they'll never remember what it felt like to be held in her arms or embraced in the warmth of her love. They'll never remember the sound of her voice reading them bedtime stories or scolding them for misbehaving. You can't take that away from them…Please. I can't raise those children alone, God, I can't. If for no other reason, then for the sake of my children, please don't take her away. Abbey and me, we're a team, without her I'll be lost." Jed's eyes blurred with tears as he looked down on his wife's wedding rings. He was wearing them on his pinkie finger and had been twisting them around and around while he spoke.

It should have been the "Apostle's Creed" that was running through his head, but instead he was being bombarded with images, much as he had been on Marine One. They were all there, all the big events. The first night he met Abbey and the first time he kissed her. The first time he told her he loved her, and the first time they made love. The day he asked her to marry him and the day she told him she was pregnant. Their wedding day, pregnancies, births, christenings, her graduation, and his inaugurations. There were simple everyday things as well. Watching her consoling a crying daughter and dancing around the kitchen singing with them. Everyday things like bathing the kids and putting their boots on and the sensual pleasure he took in watching her brush her hair at night. But, most of all, the one image that came back to him, time and time again, was that special look that was reserved for him and him only. The way that he would enter a room bone tired to see her engrossed in paperwork or a book and she would look up at him, her eyes sparkling, a smile of pure happiness crossing her face, as if he had brightened her world by just existing. Nobody but Abbey had ever loved him like that. Nobody but Abbey ever would.

"I lied when I said that I wasn't being selfish, God. I am being selfish. I'm not just asking for my kids, I'm asking for myself. I need her God; I need her much more than You do. I need to see her beautiful face first thing in the morning. I need to hear her singing our babies to sleep and chewing me out for cursing in front of them. I need her to be there to call me a jackass when I'm being one, or to knock some sense into me when I'm banging my head against the wall because I can't save the entire world. I need her to be there to chase me around with a thermometer and I need to be able to hold her in my arms at night. She's the only one who really KNOWS me, God, and I can't imagine going on with my life without her. Abbey is my not just my wife, God, she's my best friend, my confidant, my lover, my playmate and my partner. She's my life, God, please don't take her away from me. Please, I'm begging you…. Please" He buried his face on his clasped hands, silent sobs shaking his body.

Leo stood at the back of the chapel having witnessed the President's impassioned plea. With reddened eyes he made his way forward to the first pew and placed a hand on Jed's shoulder. Leo felt him stiffen and try to pull himself together but when Jed finally looked up at him his eyes were still wet and tormented with grief.

"Sir, are you all right?"

"No," Jed choked. "No, I'm not all right. I'm scared to death, Leo. What if I lose her? What am I going to do if I lose her?"

Leo felt a stab of fear at the thought. "Don't torture yourself with thoughts like that."

"I can't help it. It just keeps running through my mind over and over. What if I never get to see her again? What if I never get to hear her sass me again or feel her lips on mine? What am I supposed to tell my children?"

The raw anguish in his friend's voice and on his face caused Leo to pause momentarily as he tried to swallow past the lump in his throat and keep his tears at bay. He too had felt pain and fear at the thought of losing Abbey but it was nothing compared to what Jed was going through. If he lost Abbey the pain of that loss would shake the very foundation of his life and the shock waves of that loss would reverberate throughout the rest of his life. "Abbey's strong, she's going to make it. I know it. She has too much to live for. She won't give up."

"What if she doesn't have a choice?"

"When have you ever known Abigail Bartlet not to have a choice?"

Jed smiled through his tears. "Not too often. She is a bossy little thing, isn't she?"

"High maintenance right from the get go. Is there anything that I can do to help?"

Jed paused looking his old friend in the eye. He could see Leo's pain but suddenly the fact that he too loved Abbey brought them closer. The anger was gone with shared grief. "Pray with me."

"Sir?"

"I know you lost your faith a long time ago, Leo. But, please pray with me. Abbey needs all the prayers she can get."

"I have been," Leo said quietly, as he knelt in the pew next to Jed.

"Have been what?"

"Praying. I've been praying from the moment your panic button went off."

They kneeled together side by side; alternately praying and reminiscing about the remarkable woman whose life was hanging in the balance. There they stayed, two of the most powerful men in the world, brought to their knees with the overwhelming sense of being powerless to help the woman they loved. They stayed that way, on aching knees until the silence of the chapel was invaded.

"Sir?" Jed turned slowly, knowing that voice. It was Dr. Stewart standing behind him, still wearing his scrubs. Ice replaced the blood in his veins and for an instant he didn't want the doctor to speak, he wanted just another moment of not knowing. Not knowing if his entire life was about to be shattered by the news the doctor was about to relate. One more moment of the certain knowledge that his wife was still alive.

TBC...