The next morning Jed stood at the sink preparing to shave, wearing just his pajama bottoms. Before he lathered his jaw with shaving cream, his hands moved over Abbey's toiletries that littered the counter top. He popped the lid of her deodorant inhaling the flowery scent that was so different from his spicier one. He powdered the back of his hand with her talcum powder enjoying the feminine scent that was Abbey. God it was good to have her back here. Having her across the country, unable to physically help her had been pure torture, but now that she was back he knew that they could handle whatever life hit them with. They could handle anything, as long as they were together. At least that was what he told himself.

Abbey re-entered the bathroom, her hair was still wet from her shower and she was barefooted, but she was already wearing the dark green skirt and cream colored sleeveless silk blouse she had chosen to campaign in. She grabbed her toothbrush and began to brush her teeth while she watched Jed lather up his square jaw. For some odd reason, she had always loved to watch her husband shave. There was something just so very masculine about it, and she loved how his skin smelled and felt after he was freshly shaven. She was rinsing her mouth with mouthwash when she heard the phone ringing in the suite.

"I'll get it," she told him. She wasn't concerned. She had been told she would be called with her test results later in the afternoon.

"Hello." She was smiling as she answered the phone.

"Hi, Abbey, it's Bill."

"Hi, Bill." Abbey swallowed and her heart began to pound in her chest. Feeling lightheaded, she sat on the chair next to the phone.

"Listen, I pulled a few strings and I got your biopsy result this morning."

"Oh…okay…thanks." Abbey was struggling to keep her breathing normal and herself under control, but she had started to shake again. "So, what's up? Do I have cancer? Is it malignant?"

"Abbey, is Jed there?"

Oh God, Abbey closed her eyes and sank back against the chair. It was bad news. It had to be if he wanted to make sure that Jed was with her.

"Yes," her voice was nearly a whisper, her throat so dry she couldn't swallow. "Jed's here. Tell me Bill."

"Well, I'm glad he's there because you're going to want to celebrate. It's not cancer, Abbey."

The rest of the conversation was merely a blur to Abbey, all she kept hearing were the words "it's not cancer." After being so totally convinced that it was cancer, she was completely shocked to hear that it was not. She hung up the phone and headed toward the bathroom as if in a daze, she simply could not believe that this was over, that all her worries had been unfounded.

Jed was humming away, just getting ready to step into the shower when she walked into the bathroom. Her face was white, her eyes wide and suspiciously shiny.

"That was Bill on the phone. He had my results." Her voice was flat, completely devoid of emotion.

Jed's chest burned as he held back his own emotions, steeling himself to be strong for her, bracing himself for her breakdown, his arms ready to open wide and comfort her through this trauma. "And?" It was one simple word but it held a wealth of restrained feeling behind it. Abbey could see his jaw clenching and tightening as he awaited the news that might forever alter their lives.

"It's not cancer, Jed." Rather than shouting it to the rooftops, Abbey's stunned words were almost a whisper as if she were afraid that if she spoke too loudly God might take it all back.

Jed's eyes widened. Despite his words to Abbey to the contrary he too had been prepared for the worse. It's not…cancer?" He hadn't realized that he'd been holding his breath until his words came out on that held in breath.

"No…" She shook her head negatively, but now a smile was starting to curve across her lips as she finally allowed herself to believe that it was true. He could see now that her tears were ones of joy and disbelief rather than pain.

"Oh my GOD!" It was Jed who shouted it to the rooftops. He opened his arms and Abbey flew into them laughing with abandon, tears of relief sliding down her cheeks. He whirled her around the small bathroom whooping with exultation and kissing her face with enthusiastic gusto until she finally begged to be set down on her feet again before she got sick.

Jed did as asked. He set her down before him staring deeply into her lovely moss colored eyes now framed by dark wet lashes.

"I guess you were right," she finally admitted. "I was worried for nothing. Bill said it was just something left over from when I had that bout of mastitis when I was nursing the twins."

Jed nodded, taking credit where none was due. He ran a thumb under her eye letting a tear fall over it, unable to tell her that his fears had been just as great as hers had been.

"Well, you need to get in the shower and I need to make a phone call."

"CJ?'

"No, your mother."

Jed watched her walk away from the bathroom still in a bit of awe over that statement. At some point he would have to find out what exactly had gone on between Abbey and his mother. He stripped off his boxers and stepped into the shower and under the warm beat of the water. It was only when he was safely ensconced behind the shower door that he allowed himself to be overwhelmed by all his pent up emotion. Still, it did not release easily; it had never been easy for Jed Bartlet to cry and now was no exception.

Abbey frowned at the harsh sound emanating from the bathroom as she began to approach after getting off the phone with her mother in law. Entering the room she could hear the painful sound of choked sobs and she moved, slowly at first, but them more quickly to open the shower door. Standing before her she saw her naked husband leaning forward with hands braced against the tiled wall, his head down, and he was crying. No, crying was the wrong word, he was sobbing, gut wrenching horrible sounding sobs, the kind that were emitted from people who didn't allow themselves to cry and didn't know how to let go of themselves and let it out properly. It was only in that moment that Abbey realized just how effected her husband had been by all of this, how much he had kept from her to keep her sane and strong. Without a thought she stepped into the shower fully clothed and wrapped her arms around him from behind, not caring that she was ruining a 600 dollar suit.

Jed tensed, realizing that he was not alone. For one instant he tried to hold back his explosive release of emotion but soon gave in and relaxed again, knowing he could no longer keep this from her. He turned around then, wrapping his arms around her small frame and holding her tightly to him.

"Abbey," he choked.

"It's okay, Jed, it's okay." She was comforting him now, her hands moving over his bare back in soothing circles ignoring the pain in her chest.

Jed smoothed her wet hair back from her face and for one instant she saw the tormented look on his face, in his bloodshot blue eyes and then he buried that face in the soft curve of her neck and cried like a baby.

"I was so scared, Abbey. I was so scared that I was going to lose you…"

"Ssh…I know, baby…I know." She ran her fingers over his wet hair holding his head to her as she would one of their children. "Everything's going to be all right now. It's all over.

****

Abbey awoke with a jolt, her body drenched in sweat. She looked around, disoriented for a moment, then took in her surroundings. She was in her bedroom. It was only a nightmare. She was alive and she was at the farm. Her husband was lying in the bed beside her. She was alive. She took a deep breath and kicked off the confining sheets to get to her feet. Making her way to her armoire, she pulled her thin cotton summer nightgown up over her head.

Jed felt Abbey rise from the bed and surreptitiously watched her slip out of her nightgown. He was very conscious of the fact that she was uncomfortable with him looking at her. Since her biopsy she had yet to change her clothes while he was in the room. So, it was with some surprise that he noticed just how bruised the procedure had left her. The spot on her breast where the needle had entered was still a reddish purple bullseye, and the skin surrounding it bruised yellowish/gray.

When she turned toward the bathroom, towel in hand, she noticed that Jed's eyes were on her. She gave a soft start and held the towel to her chest. She knew the bruises would heal and that things could have been so much worse but she really hadn't wanted Jed to see her again until she was completely healed. She wanted him to view her breast the same way that he had before the lump issue had arisen. "Looks pretty hideous, doesn't it?"

"Nah," he said sliding out of bed and padding over to her. He ran a finger lightly over the bruise. " But it does look sore. Does it still bother you?"

"Not too much. Mainly when I touch it and when I put on one of these." She dangled a pale blue bra from her fingertips.

"So don't put it on." Jed wiggled his eyebrows at her and made a grab for the bra.

"You wish." She pulled it back from him. They hadn't made love since she'd found out her lump had not been cancerous, not because Jed hadn't wanted to, but because of her misguided need to return to him unsullied. Deep down inside she knew that Jed could overlook the bruising but it had left her feeling something less than sexy, and she was going to have to regain that feeling before she could make love with him again.

"Besides," she narrowed her eyes at him. "I'm mad at you."

"What did I do?"

"You couldn't wait more than a year after I was gone to hook up with some young bimbo?"

"What in the blue blazes are you talking about?" Jed was at a total loss.

"I had a dream last night, well more like a nightmare. I died. I saw it all. I saw my funeral. I saw the girls standing at my coffin and I saw the kids in your arms crying."

"Ah, shit, Abs. Why didn't you wake me up?" He knew that despite the good news, it was going to take his wife a while to get over the emotional scars her fears had caused.

"Because within a year you were re-married. She was Ellie's age for Chrissake, blond and built, although I suspect implants. I saw her potting training MY kids, they were calling her MOMMY, and you kissed her when you got back from the Oval Office. You kissed her the way that you kiss me, long and hard, no quick little peck."

Jed wanted to laugh at the absurdity; this was, after all, a dream. But, he could see that it had shaken Abbey up quite a bit, in fact her eyes were getting shiny as he simply stared at her at a loss as to how to respond.

"Oh, this is fucking ridiculous." She wiped at her eyes impatiently. "It was dream. I hold you in no way accountable." She tried to brush by him on her way into the bathroom but he stepped in front of her not letting her move past him.

"A blonde bimbo Ellie's age, huh?"

"Don't make fun of me."

"I'm not making fun of you. Are you sure it was me in your dream?"

"Of course it was you."

"Really, cause my taste tends to run toward sexy, smart mouthed little redheads, with freckles and flashing green eyes."

Abbey grinned and started to move by him but before she could quite make it he placed a hand on her shoulder to stop her, the humor gone from his eyes.

"By the way. Just for the record. You're it for me, dollface. No blondes, no brunettes, not even another redhead. Nobody could ever take your place, Abbey. My body could never want another woman's body the way that it wants yours, my mind could never connect with another woman the way that it does with you, and my heart could never love another woman the way that it loves you."

"Good answer, Bartlet. Good answer." She tiptoed up slightly to gently press her lips to his, rubbing her cheek against his now smooth jaw. "You are one damn fine man."

****

They walked along the edge of the pond hand and hand, relaxing and enjoying a summer afternoon stroll after their picnic lunch. Aislinn and Nicholas raced up ahead trying to catch up with the ducks that seemed to stay just out of reach of the two toddlers. Their parents smiled at each other as they listened to the children shriek with delight as the ducks flapped their wings spraying water every which way.

"Mama, wan ducky." Nicholas turned and called back to her.

Abbey let go of Jed's hand and approached the twosome with her baggie of bread slices. Jed stood back watching the sunlight play on her vivid hair as she bent to break up the bread and pass it out to the children who in turn tossed it out to the water for the ducks to eat. He laughed as he watched Abbey grab at their son's britches to keep him from stepping into the pond in an effort to get closer to the ducks. She curled a finger into one of the belt loops on his jean shorts holding him in place while he leaned forward against her restraint and threw breadcrumbs out to the ducks.

Aislinn, on the other hand, squatted at the water's edge in her candy cane striped overall shorts, coaxing the baby ducklings toward her with surprisingly good imitation quacks. Seeing that the ducks were wary of the big dog that was pacing between Abbey and the kids, Jed quietly called Max to his side. Once the dog was gone two of the baby ducklings made their way toward Aislinn's outstretched hand. She squealed with excitement when one of soft yellow babies pecked a bread crumb from her hand and she was able to touch it's soft back before it raced back to the safety of the water. She turned to Jed with astonished eyes.

"Touch ducky, daddy." She raced to him and grabbed his hand pulling him toward the water's edge so he could join her in her efforts to touch another ducky.

After feeding the ducks they made their way along the edge of the brook that fed into the pond. Abbey sat on the bench and watched Jed roll up his over his calves to wade in the icy water with the kids, lifting rocks in a search for salamanders. The last time she had been here, she had been so frightened, had felt so alone. Now, with Jed and the children here, listening to their laughter, it was impossible to feel alone. The tightness in her chest was gone, replaced with the sweet warmth of love and tenderness that came from being with her family. Her clean bill of health had given her a new lease on life. It no longer pained her to watch her husband playing with her children, wondering how much longer she would be around to watch them. It no longer pained her to think of her children growing up and all the milestones they would reach along the way. Now all she felt was peace and joy. She kicked her sandals off and made her way down to wade in the water with her family, joining them in their quest.

"Look, mama." Nicholas held a tiny spotted salamander out for her to touch. Abbey ooed and awwed over it and ran a finger down it's back much to her son's delight.

"Me mander, daddy." Aislinn pleaded.

"I'm looking for another one, sunshine," he said, as he lifted another rock. "Nicholas let your sister have a turn holding the salamander."

Abbey was helping in the transfer from one sibling to the other so she did not witness her husband's bare foot slipping on a slick wet rock; she simply heard his shout.

"Whoa…SHIT!" He cried out, as he toppled back on his ass in the icy brook. Abbey turned and saw him sitting in the water, his sandy brown hair over his brow, a boyish scowl crossing his face as he heard her burst into laughter.

"Quit laughing and help me," he ordered her, holding his hand out.

Still laughing Abbey gave him her hand.

"You think this is funny?" He asked, a devilish glint in his blue eyes. Abbey felt his grip tighten on her wrist.

"Josiah Bartlet, don't you dare…" She tried to pull back.

Jed gave an evil laugh and yanked her down into the water next to him.

"SHIT!" Abbey gasped as her whole body came into contact with the icy water.

"Sit…sit…sit…" Aislinn and Nicholas danced around splashing water. Abbey gave a deep sigh and rolled her eyes at Jed.

He flashed her a rueful grin and shrugged his shoulders. "Hey, at least they come by it honestly."

****

Darkness had descended on the farm. Abbey lay back on the porch swing, her legs dangling over the edge as she let the utter tranquility of the warm summer night envelop her in it's embrace. The night was not silent. Frogs that made their home on the marshy edges of the pond croaked loudly, cicadas played out a musical hum, lowing cows and soft horse whickers emanated from the barn and occasionally a loon would add it's haunting call to lovely evening melody. A melody that never failed to make Abbey thankful that this was the place that she called home. Whenever she was cooped up in the White House, or trapped in a hotel on the road, always she knew that this place was here just waiting for the day that she would return.

She heard the screen door bang shut and looked up to see Jed coming out with a glass of iced tea in each hand.

"The kids go down okay?" She asked.

"Yeah, I think they were worn out from chasing the ducks around all day." He handed her a tall glass and she sat up so that he could sit down on the swing with her, but instead of turning and sitting next to him, she simply laid back, her head on his lap.

Jed leaned back into the chair swinging them lightly as he began to absently run his fingers through Abbey's silky hair.

"It's nice here," he sighed.

"Ah, the master of understatement."

"You miss it." It was not a question.

"I do. But, we'll be back here in just over four years."

"Mmm…that confident, are you?"

"Yup. People will come around. They'll remember why they voted for you in the first place."

"Maybe."

"That doesn't sound like the Bartlet fighting spirit I heard at the convention."

"I think I realized a lot of things over this past week. Sad to say with me being this age, but maybe finding that lump made me grow up."

"Grow up?"

"Yeah. We kept thinking of it in terms of punishment, but now I think God was sending me a wake up call. This election is not the be all end all thing that I've been making it out to be. Sure I want to win. As a competitor I hate to lose. I hate to think of the Republicans trying to tear down all that I've accomplished over the past four years. I hate the idea of not getting four more years to finish everything that I've wanted to achieve. I hate the idea that if I don't get elected my legacy is not going to amount to much of anything. But you know what? None of that meant a damn thing when I thought I might lose you."

Abbey didn't say a word, merely pulled his hand from where his fingers were playing in her hair to kiss his palm.

"There is something that I need to ask you. Something that's been nagging at me."

"Okay." She twisted around on his lap so she could look up at him. "Shoot"

"Did you honestly believe that I could ever stop loving you? Did you really believe that after everything that we've been through, knowing how I feel about you that I would just walk away from you when things got messy or hard? That isn't me, Abbey, that isn't our marriage."

"You think I don't know that? No, Jed, I was never afraid of you walking away. Neither your conscience nor your heart would let you do that. You're a good man, Jed, a loyal man, a moral man, and most of the times that is very comforting."

"Most of the time?"

"For the first time in my life I had to wonder if you might stay with me because it was the right thing to do. If you would force yourself to touch me and make love to me even if you no longer had the desire to do so."

"Abbey…"

"No, let me get this out. I know that I tease you all the time about your libido and about your desire to pounce on me at any given moment, but that's part of who you are. I LOVE that you want me like that. Do you have any idea how good it makes me feel to know that you want me with as much intensity as you did when we were first married? That you continue to want me with the same intensity that I want you. To think that I might have lost that scared me because that would change a very big part of our relationship."

"Abbey, when I make love to you I make love to ALL of you, not just one part of your body. I want you so much, because I love you so much and that love will never change no matter what happens to our bodies. You didn't turn away from me when I was diagnosed with the MS."

"Of course not, but that's different, nothing has really changed."

"Not yet, but you don't know what you could be dealing with 10 or 20 years down the road, could be nothing, could be something."

"But you'll still be you, maybe not the same, but it will still be you."

"Exactly. You just made my point beautifully. You'd still be you even without either of your breasts and I'd still want you and love you."

"I know that. Deep down I always knew that. It's funny how irrational fear can make you. But I think that you were right. I think that this scare was a wake up call. I have to admit. I wasn't looking forward to this part of the campaign push. I was dreading these last three months, the speeches the fundraisers and knowing that we'd be separated for most of them, but now…"

"Now what?"

"Now I can't wait to get out there. Between my appendix bursting and finding the lump I have a new lease on life. It's kind of like God almost took it all away as his way of saying "don't take it all for granted, Abbey, use your time here wisely'."

"You have, Abbey. My God, you've given the world five beautiful, bright children and you are a doctor, you chose to devote your life to helping people through your profession. You've volunteered at Red Cross units and free health clinics."

"Other than raising Aislinn and Nicholas the rest of all that has been in the past. I know that I've been pretty wrapped up with being a mother for the past two years, so much so that I've neglected being the First Lady that I could be and I'm not going to apologize for that. I did what I had to do for my children. But, I don't want to be just a figurehead, a pretty face on your arm. I'm going to do everything in my power to get you re-elected and then I'm going to carve out a place for myself and work on my own legacy."

Jed smiled down at her. He loved hearing the passion back in her voice and he'd always loved what a fighter she was. "To the campaign." He lifted his glass of iced tea.

"To the campaign." She touched her glass to his with a grin and they both gazed out over the darkened fields into a future they could not know. They could not know what battles and what pitfalls might lie ahead, but what they did know, thanks to this summer filled with storms, was that they were strong enough and resilient enough to withstand damn near anything that was thrown their way. Maybe that was what God had been trying to remind them of all along. That it wasn't about winning or losing, that it was about the strength of love and a life well lived. It was a lesson that both Abbey and Jed had learned well and would not soon forget.

The End!