PART 4: THE LEAP: consummation

 Why did I wait so long to tell her? Fear. But I wouldn't think about that now. She loved me! How was that possible? I didn't deserve her. But I was too much of a selfish bastard to worry about whether I deserved her or not. I would take whatever she was willing to give me. Whew, long day. 

On the ride home, she surprised me by asking me out on a date. "Mulder, I have to attend this pathology seminar. It's a dinner dance kind of thing, with lectures thrown in. It's one of the stupid things I need to do to keep my license up. I need to attend so many continuing education seminars. It's next weekend and we're allowed to bring a friend. Would you like to go?" 

"Be your escort, Scully?" 

"Yeah, something like that." 

"I'd love too."

 "Good, it's Saturday night." She giggled.

 "What are you giggling about?"

 "Well, I was just thinking about this other woman doctor that I run into all the time at these things. She's a prissy bitch. Every time I see her she's with some new guy. She always gives me a hard time about the fact that I always come alone. I even overheard her saying I would never get a man because I was a cold bitch."

 "You're a lot of things Scully, but a cold bitch isn't one of them." 

"Was that a complement?"

 "Yeah, it was."

 "Thanks, I think." They both laughed.

 "So, will this be a 'date'?"

 "Um, yeah, I guess it will. Do we need to date?"

 "No, we've been dating for almost seven years."

 "I guess we have." 

"But I want to date." 

"You do?" 

"Yeah, ya know, wine and dine you. I have to warn you though, I'm really out of practice."

 "You're doing good so far." 

"Am I?"

 "Yup."

 "Well, then, I guess I'll be able to figure things out as I go along."

 They rode the rest of the way in silence.

He followed her to her door and waited while she unlocked the door. She gestured him inside and took his suit jacket, hanging it on her coat rack. He suddenly felt shy and nervous for no particular reason. He'd been in Scully's apartment a thousand times. But it was different now. He'd told her he loved her and she returned that love. That didn't mean she wanted to jump into bed with him. He knew she wanted him, but he wasn't sure suddenly how to behave. 

She walked into the kitchen without looking back and returned to the living room with a bottle of Chardonay and two wine glasses to find him still standing near the door where she had left him.

 "Mulder?"

 "Mmm?"

 "What's wrong?" She was suddenly unsure. Had she done something wrong? Had she been too presumptuous that he would want to continue the evening? He said he loved her but she was sure the confession was not easy for him and maybe he'd wanted to be alone now.

 "Nothing's wrong."

 "Then why are you still standing my the door?"

 "Umm, I'm not sure what..."

 "Not sure about what? Mulder if you don't want to be here right now, you don't have to be. I will understand."

 "NO! I mean, I want to be here, I just don't know what ..."

 "Spit it out Mulder."

 "I'm not sure what to do now."

 She smiled at him. Oh my god, he was nervous! How cute. She didn't voice that thought, he would not appreciate it. "Well, do anything you want."

 He looked at her and took a few steps into the living room. "I want whatever you want." He paused. "Tell me what you want Scully, I mean, what you want me to do, right now, I mean. Not in general. Christ, I'm more out of practice with this than I thought."

 She chuckled. "You don't need to be nervous around me Mulder, I'm not going to bite you." He laughed a nervous laugh then. 

"This is so weird. I've been in here a thousand times but I feel different being here now, not knowing what this all means, or where we go from here. I never allowed myself to think for one minute that you would return my feelings. So, I never thought about what I would do if you did. Does that make any sense at all?"

 "Yeah, it does. Look, I'm not sure what to do either, but I'll tell you what I do know."

 "Tell me."

 "I'm not ready for this evening to end, Mulder. I want to sit here on the couch and have a glass of wine."

 "I can do that." He sounded relieved. He walked to couch and sat down on one end, his back against the armrest, kiddy corner and reclined, his long legs sloping off the couch. She looked at his long legs, the way his expensive dress slacks pulled snug across his thighs as he sat down. Her eyes traveled up and she wondered what was in those slacks. She'd heard the rumors. I wonder if they're true? She gave herself a mental shake and her eyes slid up to his chest. She knew what was under that silk shirt, firm lean pecs and washboard abdomen.

She'd seen him shirtless enough times. She couldn't wait to run her hands over it again. She realized she was staring and looked up to his face. 

She almost gasped at the look at raw desire and need etched across his face. His eyes were hooded like earlier, his eyes looked black and he was still, too still. She'd only seen this look twice now, but she recognized it immediately. He was aroused. Because she looked at him? Oh god.

 His voice was low and raspy. "Scully, do you have any idea what happens to me when you look at me like that?"

 Her gaze locked with his. "I'm sorry."

 "I'm not."

 She turned and set the glasses on the table and went to pour the wine, breaking the moment. She heard him take a deep, shaky breath. She was trying to get her breathing under control again. As she lifted the bottle, she realized her hands were shaking. Too late, before she could bring her other hand in for assistance, she tipped the bottle and splashed wine all down the side of the glass and onto the coffee table. She almost dropped the bottle but caught it and set it down on the table with a thunk. "Damn it!" She couldn't look at him.

She was so embarrassed. She jumped up and headed into the kitchen for a dish towel. His own nervousness and embarrassment were immediately forgotten as he saw the distress on her face. God, she was as nervous as he was.

 She stomped into the kitchen and grabbed a towel off the sink and turned to head back, her eyes stinging with tears of embarrassment. She ran straight into Mulder's chest. "Umph."

 He folded his arms around her and pulled her in, resting his chin on the top of her head. She turned her head to rest her cheek on his chest. "I'm sorry Mulder. I'm being such an ass."

 "Shhh, nothing to be sorry about. We both need to relax. I don't know why I'm nervous, but I am."

 "Me neither." 

"This is still me, ya know?"

 "And this is still me," she replied softly.

 "Let's take this slow, O.K. No expectations, no demands. Let's just have our wine and try to relax. We did O.K. at dinner, let's not have a meltdown now." 

She chuckled at that. "Meltdown, huh?"

 "I feel like I'm having one."

 "Define meltdown."

 "I feel like I've lost about 100 points off my I.Q."

 She giggled and the sound was music to his ears. "Down in the double digits now are we?" He laughed with her.

 "You have that effect on me."

 "Do I?" He drew her away gently and put his hands on either side of her head, burying his hands in her hair and tilting her face up to look at him.  

"Yeah, you do. Do you know how many times I've dreamed of seeing you look at me like you did out there?"

 "No."

 "I've lost count."

 "I've looked at you that way a lot of times."

 "Have you?" She nodded.

 "God, Scully, you're so beautiful you don't seem real sometimes."

 He made her feel beautiful. His words gave her a warm fuzzy. She put her hands and his chest and slid them down to his abdomen and then around to rest just above his hips. A low hum sounded from the back of his throat.

 "Does that seem real."

 "It feels very real."

 "Let's go have that wine." He followed her back into the living room and poured the wine while she cleaned up the spill from the table. He handed her a glass and sat back on the couch, one arm across the back.

 "Sit down, Scully." She sat gingerly on the couch next to him. His hand cups her far shoulder. "Closer."

 She looked at him and slid over until their hips were touching and reclined into his side, her head tucked onto his chest. He squeezed gently and took a sip of his wine. "That wasn't so hard, was it?"

 "No, it wasn't." The sat in companionable silence for a while, just sipping their wine and enjoying the feel of each other's bodies relaxing against one another.

 God, he did feel good. His body was lean but so solid. His heat diffused her body and she began to relax. His hands skimmed her shoulder, down her bar arm and back up again. The movement mesmerized her for a minute and she put her glass on the table. She turned and he held his glass out. She took it and placed it on the table and leaned back into him, turning sideways. She wanted to feel more. She leaned into him and placed her left hand on his chest, sitting up higher so she could lay her head on his shoulder.

 "I forget how short you are," he commented casually.

 "Hey, no short jokes, buddy or I'll toss you out on your can."

 He chuckled. "No jokes. I like it. You're so strong, but so feminine at the same time." She never thought she'd like hearing those words, but at the moment they filled her with happiness. She wanted to be feminine for him. After his confession at dinner, she knew that he did not equate her stature with weakness and was not offended in the slightest.

 "I always wondered if you noticed I was a girl."

 "No, I didn't."

 "You didn't?!"

 "No, but I noticed you were a woman."

 "Oh. How so?"

 "You really want to know?"

 "Yeah, I do."

 "What do want to know? How much detail?"

 Ooo, he was being so careful. She loved it. "Lots of detail. Tell me your fantasies."

 "That could be dangerous."

 "I'm feeling rather dangerous."

 "Are you now, Agent Scully."

 "Yes, Agent Mulder, I believe I'm in the mood for a lot of danger this evening."

 "O.K., but it could get ugly, don't say I didn't warn you."

 "I have been duly warned, sir, you may proceed." He chuckled.

 "Well, let's see. 'I am woman, hear me roar' comes to mind." She slapped him playfully on the chest. "Umph."

 "Come on. Entertain me with that wonderland of an imagination of yours."

 "Wonderland?"

 "You're evading."

 "Am I?"

 "Indeed. Spill it."

 "If I tell you mine, you have to tell me yours."

 "Deal."

 "O.K. then. I don't even know where to start."

 "What made you think of me as a woman?"

 "Besides the obvious, you mean?"

 "Quit evading."

 "O.K. Your perfect body."

 "Perfect? Hardly. I thought you liked tall, leggy brunettes."

 "No. Lost my taste for them."

 "When?"

 "About the day you walked into our office." She noticed that he said 'our' office without hesitation. "Your hair when it's floating free like this. It looks like soft copper and it feels like corn silk. I remember the first time I felt it." 

"When?" Silence.

 "When, Mulder."

 "After the Phaster case." She shuddered. "Sorry, Scully that's why I hesitated. I hate to think about that time. But it was the first time you let yourself be vulnerable to me. You let me see your fear and you let me comfort you. Do you remember?"

"Yes. I was so scared that day. I remember asking the cops, 'How in hell could no one have noticed such a beautiful woman renting a car at that place.' When I figured out where you were, I was terrified I wouldn't be in time. I almost wasn't."

 "But you were. I felt like such a...girl...but I was so shaken, so scared. The sweetest sound in the world was you busting through that door. I instantly knew I was going to be O.K. But then the shock hit and I couldn't hide my fear from you anymore. I remember you folding me into your arms. It felt like you surrounded me and I felt safe." 

"Yeah. I remember it all. Every second. My heart broke to see you so scared, but I was filled with relief at the same time that I had found you in time. It was a perverse kind of pleasure I got from being able to hold you. Not sexual pleasure. I wanted to comfort you but at the same time, I couldn't help registering how good it felt to hold you. Cradling you against me, I remember how soft your hair was, like corn-silk."

"Hmm. What else?" 

"Your tiny waist. My palm almost covers your lower back when I touch you there."

 "I love it when you do that." 

"Yeah?" 

"Yeah."

 "Your breasts."

 "What about them?"

 "They're perfect. So full for your small frame."

 "Glad you like them."

 He couldn't believe she was sitting there calmly while he catalogued her womanly traits. Before tonight, he would have thought she would have screamed 'inappropriate behavior' and 'sexual harassment' had he ever mentioned it. His mind slipped into the myriad of fantasies he's had about her. Could he tell her? Well, he'd already heard one of hers, but she didn't know that yet. He was unsure if he'd ever be able to make that confession. His eyes closed and she watched him covertly. She wanted to kiss the pulse in his neck but she wanted to hear more. It was only 9:00 PM. They had all night. She didn't think he'd leave unless she told him to go and she wanted to hear more.  

"Keep going." 

"You know all those videos that aren't mine?"

 "Yeah, I know the ones."

 "Many of them feature petite red heads."

 "You're kidding!"

 "No, I'm not." He was chuckled at her shocked reaction. "God, Scully, even if they didn't, all I had to do was close my eyes and I could see you, imagine what it would feel like to have your hands on me. Those lips, I love your full lips. I could taste them, I could come just thinking about having those lips on me."  

Her lips suddenly pressed to the juncture where his neck met his shoulders and she sucked on his skin. He moaned and his eyes snapped open. "Scuuulllyyy."She didn't respond except to nip his skin sharply and the smooth the spot with her tongue. He turned to recline against the armrest and pulled her up to sprawl on top of him. He pulled her down into a kiss and began invading her mouth.

 Good Lord, he tasted so good, like wine and salt. He smelled so good, like fresh air and English Leather. The combination of his smell and his taste was intoxicating. And that tongue, that wicked, talented tongue. She wanted to feel it everywhere. She loved the way he responded to her. It made her feel empowered, feminine, beautiful, but strong. She pulled away and rained kisses on his high cheekbones, his beautiful jaw line and went back to do what she'd always wanted to do. She nipped and then sucked on his bottom lip, rolling around it with her tongue. His moans vibrated through her body and made her moist all over. When his hand brushed across her breast she lost in the sensation of her nipple becoming painfully erect.

 I want him, she thought. I've never wanted anyone this way. He was letting her have the control. She knew he was holding back, afraid to make a wrong move. She would have to give the green light. He wouldn't take charge without her permission. She broke the kiss and stared into his hazel eyes. He was breathing heavily and she could feel his hardness pressing into her belly.  

"Mulder."

 "What?"

 "I don't want to wait."

 "Wait?"

 "I know you said take it slow, but..."

 "But?"

 "I can't. I want you so badly. I don't want to wait. I've waited long enough."

 "You mean...?"

 "Yes. I want to make love to you."

 I want to make love to you. He'd never heard sweeter words. Not just I want you, but I want to make love to you. Big difference. "Not here on the couch," he whispered. He wanted the first time to be special and he didn't want to grope her on her couch like a couple of teenagers. Not that he had any complaints about the feel of her tiny body sprawled on top of his.

 "Bedroom." One word was all she could get out at a time. The stood up. She grabbed his hand and walked swiftly into the bedroom, dragging him behind her. The moon was bright through the window and cast just enough light to put them in shadow but be able to see each other clearly.

 She smiled at him a predatory gleam in her eye and he was sure he'd never seen anything so beautiful. "God, Scully, that look. It kills me." 

"What look?"

 "Like you want to devour me."

 "I do."

 "God help me." He reached for her and kissed her until she was whimpering again.

 "Clothes," she gasped. He understood and they separated briefly and began ripping their clothes off. Her dress was pulled over her head and sent flying across the room. He ripped his tie off and his pulled his shirt over his head. He paused to reach for her bra. "Just strip."  

He smiled and quickly undid his belt and dropped his pants, kicking his shoes and socks off until they both stood there in their underwear. Her eyes slid up and down his body once. "Naked, Mulder, I want you naked." He quickly drew his boxers down as he watched her slip out of her blue panties. They stopped them and just stared at each other in amazement, admiring their first unfettered view of each other. They'd both seen each other naked, but it was always under tense circumstances, one of them was either hurt or sick or injured. There'd been no time for an examination. Now they had time. They both decided time was up and moved into each other at the same time. She grabbed his hand and tugged him toward the bed, then turned and leaped onto it, scuttling up to the head board and turning to recline against the pillows. She looked like a painting. So beautiful he couldn't stop looking. 

"Mulder, I need to touch you." That spurred him into action and he crawled across the bed and wrapped his arms around her. They lay facing each other and he began to kiss her again.

 "Tell me what you want Scully."

 "I don't know, just touch me." So he did. He locked his lips onto hers and began running his hands over her sides, stomach, thighs, up to her chest, across her neck, never breaking contact of their mouths. He teased her peaks with his thumbs until she squirmed and pressed herself into his hands. He sat up and swung one leg over her thighs, straddling her. Her eyes were closed, her chin tipped up exposing her swan-like neck.

 He whispered, "Open your eyes, Scully." She did and he caught his breath at what he saw there. Love, desire, trust, and need were all there in her smile and her eyes. He lowered his head and took one of her nipples into his mouth and sucked gently, swirling his tongue around the hardened nub. She gasped and arched her back off the bed, pressing herself into his face. He groaned and sucked harder. Her moans increased with the level of suction so kept escalating it, pulling more and more of her breast into his mouth until he had her moaning continuously and her head was thrashing on the pillow. He finally pulled back and looked at her.

 "Mulder, god, you're driving me crazy." He smiled and licked his way down to her navel, swirling in the indentation there. He ran a hand through her curls and then stretched out on his stomach between her legs and pushed his arms under her thighs, gripping her at the top of her legs. He pulled her legs apart firmly but gently and she gasped. He looked up at her, asking permission.  

"Please," she hissed. He didn't have to be told twice and dove into her, his tongue lapping at her wetness and his nose buried in her curls. He sucked, he nipped. He laved across her lips and lapped out her wetness. And finally, finally, he swirled his tongue over her bulging nub of nerves at the top of her wetness. She let out a strangled groan. He smiled, pushed two finger inside her until he saw her body flush and buck when he found her G-spot on the front wall of her vagina. He concentrated on the spot, feeling her wetness increase and then gently fizzle as it leaked out around his fingers. He continued until she was thrashing again and bucking her hips. Then he lowered his mouth again and sucked on her hardened nub, HARD.

 She screamed his name as her orgasm ripped through her body, causing her hips to buck, her back to arch and her head to thrash. He sucked and rubbed his fingers quickly, prolonging her orgasm.

 My god, she's screaming my name! I can't believe it. His mind just couldn't wrap around the fact that he was in Dana Scully's bed with his face between her legs. She tasted like tangy honey and he delighted in her loss of control. She was trusting him to be completely vulnerable in her passion. This was a very intimate act and his heart soared that she had given permission, the first time, no hesitation. He could hardly contain his joy. He felt like laughing but knew it would come out sounding hysterical and he didn't want to freak her out. What he could do though was ignore, his painful erection and see how many times he could make her come. He would never get enough of watching this happen and tasting her. He left his fingers inside until she came back to him, damp with sweat, her thighs trembling slightly and her blue orbs smoky with spend passion. 

"Jesus, Mulder, I've never come that way." Mulder beamed at her. Does it get any better than this, he thought.

 "Your turn," she announced. 

"Not yet." His voice was husky and gravel. 

"God your voice is so sexy," she murmured.

 He couldn't believe the things he was hearing. "Hey, Agent Scully, you never told me one of your fantasies."

 "This." That was all she said, as she rolled him onto his back, knelt between his legs and took him into her mouth so fast, he barely had time to register it. She grabbed the base with one tiny hand and pumped firmly as her mouth slid over him, hot and wet. His hips arched up at the sudden sensation of her hands and lips on him. 

"Ahh, Christ, Scully," he choked out. Her mouth was so hot and so wet. Her tongue was swirling around his soft tip each time she pulled back. Then she would descend again. He knew he was probably babbling nonsense but he didn't care. His voice was choked with tears as the situation overwhelmed him. He was really in bed with the woman he had loved for so long and she had her mouth on him.

 "Dana, can't believe...so good...the way you...make me...feel...heaven...dreamed this...no comparison...yeess, ahh, yeah,...just like that...oh Dana...so hot...so sexy." The the couldn't talk anymore as he cupped his sacs with her free hand, caressing them.

She began to suck on him hard, her cheeks hollowing with the effort her full lips pouting around his aching shaft. The sight was incredible. He struggled to keep his eyes open and watch. He stared, but then let his head fall back as he released a continuous groan, interrupted only by her name. He'd never felt anything like this before.

 She knew he was close and increased her suction and her pace. His words and groans spurring her on. His hips thrust up into her mouth. She knew he was holding back, not wanting to gag her. He was pretty big. Quite impressive actually. But she was relaxed. She'd only done opened her throat once before and it had been a long time ago, but she was sure she could do it again, for him. She lifted off him quickly and muttered, "Let go, Mulder, you won't hurt me." Then she descended again.

 Those words made what little control he had snap. He cried out and began thrusting up into her beautiful face. So close so close. Then he growled amazement on his upward thrust as he felt the back of her throat open and he slid into her to the hilt. 

"JESUS, DANA, OHGODOHGOD, OH GOOODDD!" He was shouting as she retreated and took him down her throat again. Once, twice, threetimes. On his next thrust, her hand slid between his legs and rubbed his sensitive skin behind his balls.  

He screamed her name and exploded into her mouth. 

**

 Holy shit. He'd never had an orgasm this intense. His balls were clenching hard up against shaft with each surge of cum he jettisoned down her throat. His cock was burning fromtheforce of his ejaculations. It felt like he was going to turn inside out. The pleasure was so exquisite it made him dizzy and was close to pain. He squirted his essence into her over and over again, wondering when it would stop and if youcould die from this kind of ecstacy. Finally, he collapsed into a boneless heap, exhausted and twitching from the aftershocks that still rocked his body. She was still attached to him, gentlylapping him to clean up the residue.

 He pulled her up to lay on his chest and kissed her tenderly. "Have mercy, Scully."

 "Good?"

 "No." Her face fell. "Exquisite, mind-melting, ecstasy maybe, but way, way past good." She beamed him a smile but then her eyelids drooped. 

"Tired?"

 "Yeah."

 "Mmm. Me too."

 "Let's rest."

 "I might fall asleep if I rest. And I wanted to do this right."

 "You did do it right."

 "But I wanted to..."

 "I know, we have time."

 "You're not kicking me out tonight?"

 "Not a chance pal, you're stuck here now." He smiled a smile of pure joy and she felt her heart turn over in her chest. 

"Let's sleep Mulder. Long day. We're both done in." 

"O.K." he mumbled, already drifting off. They curled up, he on his back, her on her side wrapped around him and they slept.

PART 5: THE LEAP priorities

 I awake feeling slightly disoriented. Something wasn't right. I ventured to open an eye and nearly panicked when I saw the broad expanse of tanned skin beneath my cheek. Then it all came flooding back. Mulder!

 Sweet Jesus, I had Mulder in my bed! Mulder; my colleague, my partner, my best friend and now my lover. Whoa. What had I done? How had it happened so fast? Fast? My other voice questioned. Nearly seven years of developing a relationship was hardly fast. But brining that relationship to this level had all happened in one day. One day! 

One day and I'd gone from total denial, to trusting a friend with my fantasies, to sexually wanton, to acceptance and then to aggressive lover. Glancing at the clock on the nightstand, she saw that it was 4:30 AM. The moon was still bright, pouring in the windows, a soft glow slanting across the bed. 

I lifted my head to look at this face. It was soft and unlined in sleep, peaceful. His lips were slightly parted, the edges turned up in the faintest suggestion of a smile. His face was boyish ad vulnerable. Several errant locks of his lush dark hair fell across his forehead. I reached up to brush them back, causing him to stir. He swallowed slowly and whispered, "Dana..." my name almost a sigh. My heart swelled in my chest. His smile deepened a bit. It'd watched him sleep before but he'd never had a smile on his face. He'd usually been sick or injured at the time. I didn't want to wake him. I wanted to watch him for a while.

I carefully pushed the sheet covering us down below our knees. I was tucked lightly into his side, one of my legs wedged between his thighs, almost touching his genitals. My Irish skin was stark white against his tanned legs. The skin of dark legs faded into a soft olive at the top of his thighs where his tan line crossed his thigh. Even the skin of his hips and waistline was not white though, but a soft, ruddy, off-white.

 I inhaled deeply taking in his smell; musky, warm with just a wisp of his cologne lingering. Soft hair dusted his thighs. His chest hair was sparse with a soft clump above his breastbone. A line descended to his abdomen and thickened into the dark thatch between his legs. I could see the well-toned definition of his stomach muscles, his lean hip bones jutting out slightly around his narrow waist. His thighs were muscular but his legs were long and lanky. God, he was beautiful, just beautiful.

 I looked at his face gain and stared at his lips. That bottom lip, full, wide and slightly pouty had held my eyes so many times, jutting out beneath his slightly too large nose.

 I suppressed a chuckle with a slight shake of my head as I realized that we had made love. Well, he had made love to me and I to him, but we hadn't joined together. We'd both been too needful of expressing our love and ultimate trust to the other. Leave it to Mulder to make even sex an our of the ordinary experience. Most men wouldn't have bothered to pleasure me that way the first time they were together. They would have just jumped on her. And oh, such pleasure, first from his mouth and then by his fingers. 

I knew sex with Mulder would be intense and extremely passionate. Everything he did was intense and extremely passionate. But I'd never suspected what having all that intensity and passion directed at me would do to me. I'd completely lost control. That had never happened to me. Even during sex, I had always maintained some modicum of control, some awareness of my surroundings and what I was doing. Not this time. I had totally and utterly surrendered to his passion. Odd, I thought it would make me feel vulnerable, weak and exposed to let go like that. That's why I never had done it. Instead, it left me feeling sated, complete and empowered, and sexy. No man had ever made me feel so beautiful, so sexy, so much - a woman. God help, I loved this man. And somehow he'd managed to do this without taking anything away from me. He took away no dignity, took away no strength. He added to it. I hadn't felt glad to be woman in every long time. Just add it to the list of growing miracles this man had brought into my life.

 And let's not forge the biggest miracle of all. LOVE! He loved me, totally, completely, unconditionally, warts and all. And let's fact it, old girl, for all you're academic assets, in the personal life department, I'm no bargain. I'm quirky, a creature of habit and science, well-ordered to the point of being rigid at times and distinctly bitchy and argumentative at times. I knew these things about myself even if I never admitted them to anyone else. But Mulder knew all those things and he loved me anyway. 

I couldn't see his eyes right now but I remembered those sparkling hazel orbs gazing at me heavy with desire, awe, and love. I shivered a the thought of his need for me. Just that one thought and I felt a gush of warm stickiness between my thighs. My apex was pressed to his thigh and my wetness coated him where my juncture met his thigh. Even in sleep, Mulder responded to my arousal. He moaned softly, tightening the arm around my back, pulling me closer. I glanced down to see his penis lift from his thigh and swing gently upwards and to the side, lying half-erect below hi hip. My hand brushed his chest hair and I bent down to lave his nipple with the flat of my tongue. He tasted salty and so masculine. His groan brought my eyes up. Hazel eyes locked with mine and he smiled.

 "Don't stop touching me."

 I went back to work, dragging my tongue across his chest, his collarbone, and up to the cords in his neck. Then I sucked his earlobe into my mouth.

 "Scully."

 "Call me Dana."

 "Dana? Am I dreaming?"

 "No." He took my hand and brought it down between his legs. I grasped him firmly and began stroking. I felt his breathing quicken as he become fully erect in my hand.

 "Oh, Dana, you make me feel so good." His voice was sleepy and so sexy. I loved to hear it. He pulled me onto his chest, spreading my thighs so I was straddling his abdomen. I could feel his hardness pressing against my butt cheeks. Christ, the tip was brushing my lower back. He was so big.

 His movements were slow and sleepy, but so erotic. His hand slid down to brush my clitoris. I gasped. Then he cupped both m y breasts in his large, hands, kneading gently and flicking the tips with his thumbs.

 "Mulder."

 "I want to taste," he said drowsily. I leaned down and he latched onto my right breast with his lips, suckling hard but slow. His tongue made lazy circles around my areola with each suck, and then he would release the pressure only to pull me in again, slow and hard.

 "Ooohhh, Mulder, so good, so good." I murmured in his ears. He increased his suction almost to the point of pain but never went any faster. "Yesss." It was a hiss between my teeth. He left that breast and moved o the other one, giving it equal treatment. Everything was in slow motion. His hands moved rhythmically, squeezing my hips in time to his sucking.

 "Mulder, I need you inside me, please." 

"Hhhmmmmmm." His low hum sent jolts of tingling and warmth down my torso. Without breaking his hold, effortlessly lifted my hips and perched me at the top of his penis, my knees barely touching the mattress. I took a split second to admire his building biceps in this position, elbows braced on the mattress, arms supporting the bulk of my weight. I didn't have long to admire. He wiggled his hips, brushing at my entrance with the head of his shaft. Feeling my wetness coating him, he groaned.

 Then he surprised me with the first quick move he'd made since this started. He gripped my hips tightly, and slammed my body down on top of him, bucking his hips up off the bed at the same time. He raised his knees slightly at the same time, one seamless motion that impaled his engorged sex inside me to the hilt and ground his pubic bone against mine.

 I screamed his name as the totally unexpected orgasm ripped through me, starting at my apex and continuing up through my torso. My head fell backwards and I dug my nails into his shoulders, raking the bunching muscles there. I was stretched so wide. I could feel every contraction grip his cock and skitter away loose only to grip again as my walls tried to pull him deeper inside.

 Only then did he release my breast and gather me in his arms, holding me as the aftershocks subsided.

 "Jesus Christ, Mulder, what is it with you?"

 He shook his head and it was then I realized he was gritting his teeth.

 "Mulder, did I hurt you?"

 "Don't... move!" he ground out. I nodded. About 15 seconds passed, his jaw grinding his teeth, his throat swallowing hard. I had a frown on my face, unsure of what had happened. I knew he hadn't come. My long unused tunnel was tight around him, despite my orgasm and I could feel every tensing throb of his huge shaft as it was stuffed in so tight. No, he hadn't come. OH! HE HADN'T COME! The proverbial light bulb went on over my head and I realized what was happening. He was trying not to! Duhh, Dana. You really are out of practice! I smiled at my own stupidity.

 Finally, he relaxed, the air rushing out of his lungs, his hips retreating into the mattress. His eyes opened and he flashed me a grin. "Thank God." 

 "I didn't think you believed in God." 

"I may start, there's no other explanation as to why I didn't lose it just now."

 "I wouldn't have minded, after all, my body just betrayed me big time." I waggled my eyebrows at him. He laughed. 

"I would've minded. I want to go slow, make this last." We still hadn't moved, both adjusting to the feel of each other. 

I sat up and lifted slightly, settling back down. I hissed at the sensation. 

"Oh, god, Dana, you feel so incredible. I didn't hurt you, did I?" he asked concern flooding his face.

 "No, hardly, or we're you sleeping through that orgasm I just had?" He laughed again.

 "Hell no, it almost killed me. I didn't expect it." 

"Me neither. It's been a while though, I'll probably be sore." I was raising and lowering myself very slowly. He frowned at my words and began to lit me off of him like he was going to stop. I grabbed his shoulders and pushed him back into the mattress.

 "Dana, I don't want to hurt..." I cut him off.

 "Don't you dare leave me now. Stay right where you are." He looked startled at my command.

 "I won't leave you, I just..."

 "Shut up, Mulder." He clamped his mouth shut and reclined on the mattress, watching me as I rose up again and languidly slid back down, moaning slightly at the sensation.

 "It's O.K., Mulder, it's normal to be sore when you haven't done it in a while. I have done this in nearly five years." He was still frowning. I had to break him out of this concerned for me bullshit attitude. I moved up as high as my legs would left me and slid back down again roughly. He bit his bottom lip against a grunt.

 "And Mulder." 

"Yeah?"

 "Stop worrying. I have a job for you." 

"A job?"

 "Yeah, I want you to fuck me until I can hardly walk." His eyes widened in shock and then his frown broke and he hooted with laughter, a deep belly laugh that had me bouncing against the rise and fall of his stomach. I smiled at his reaction, loving the sound of his deep laughter filling up the room." 

"Yes, Mam!" He grabbed my waist and flipped me onto my back, pulling my legs up to his hips, never breaking our joining. His laughter was still just below the surface. "Are you certain that's what you want, Agent Scully. I warned you to be careful what you ask for."

 "I know exactly what I'm asking for."

 "Do you?" I hesitated at the slightly predatory gleam in his eyes.

 "Even if I don't, I want to find out."

 "O.K., you asked for it, but you have to do exactly as I say?"

 "Huh?"

 "If I say stop, you have to stop."

 "O.K."

 "If I say change position, you have to do it."

 "O.K."

 "You want to test my endurance do you? This will be tough, I could come just looking at you right now."

 "You're serious. Completely serious, aren't you?"

 "Were you?" His voice held a challenge.

 "Are you up for a lengthy session of wild sex, Agent Mulder?"

 "I'd like to try."

 "Go for it."

 "Oh, one more thing." I noticed he was still just as hard, not moving still. All this talking hadn't distracted him from his arousal a bit. 

"What's that?"

 "I want you to call me, Fox."

 Now it was my turn to be wide-eyed. I knew I looked shocked. He smiled. "But..."

 He leaned down into my ear, brushing the shell of my ear with his lips. "No buts, I want you to call me Fox when I'm touching you. Only you, Dana. And I want to hear you say it when I make you come." I shivered. "And," he pulled out of me, leaving just his tip inside and then slid back in sharply and fully between each word. "I...will...make...you...come. Hard. I didn't do it ... earlier...but you...will...beg...me...to...come...this...time."

Now, on anyone else, a statement like that be purely aggravating arrogance. But I knew Mulder and he was just stating a fact. He would do what he said because he was tenacious and single-minded and he was determined. I could see the determination on his face.

 "Make love to me, Fox." His thrusting began slow and sure, long, slow, deep strokes that built my arousal to a sharp edge and then he would pull back. He sped up, he slowed down, he my legs up on his shoulders and then around his hips. He was relentless. He only asked me to stop for a breather twice. I obediently held as still as I could. Then he would begin again. Hip lips and hands were everywhere; my face, neck, ears, lips, breasts, arms. He took me from behind, from beneath, sitting upright. He would bring me right to the edge, pull out, change positions and start building me up again.

 I lost count of the number of times he pulled me right to the edge and pulled back. By then I was whimpering and crying in frustration. I couldn't take it anymore. I had heard that more times you were brought to the edge, the more intense the orgasm. If that was true, this just might kill me. I was coiled so tight I thought my body was going to crack. So I caved. And true to his words, I begged, sobbing with need.

 "Fox, Oh god, Please make me come. Oh god, I need to come. Please. No more. I can't take it, I'm dying. Foooxxx, pleeeaaasssee," I wailed. "I'm begging you, Ah, ha, ha, Fox, please."

 He reared back, dragging me up with him and nearly slammed my hands up over my head, curling my fingers around the vertical posts of my headboard and pushing my hips back, moving under me and wrapping my legs around his waist. Hi face was a mask of wild passion, almost pain. I was upright, my arms out stretched to my sides, and my legs spread around his torso. I had a flash vision of Christ pinned to the Cross.

 He grabbed my hips tightly, holding them in place and began bucking his hips up, hard and fast, impaling me on his enormous shaft. I couldn't move from the waist down. He held me so firmly. My eyes were glued to the sight of his huge shaft, glistening with my juices disappearing inside me, pulling out and disappearing again. He began sucking on my breast hard as he continued to slam into me, filling me to the brim. He reached down suddenly and pressed my clitoris with his thumb against his shaft, rubbing hard. That did it. And good lord, I've never screamed like this in my life.

 "Foooxxx! Oh Christ, oh God, Ahhhhhh, Ahhhhhh. I LOVE YOU, FOX, GOD, I love you." Then I just degenerated into continuous groaning and wailing. Sounds I didn't recognize as ever having come from inside me poured out of the back of my throat as the most keening, intense orgasm ripped through my body, over and over again. My whole body convulsed as the contractions gripped and released me. I thought briefly that I must look like I'm having a grand mal seizure. As my spasms began to die down, I felt him explode inside me, crying out my name in a hoarse primal wail and contractions started up again at the feel of the first hot wash of his semen inside me. The tremors were less intense this time but still rocking my body. My arms fell to this shoulders and we sat panting, sweat streaming off both our bodies in rivulets. His chest gleamed in the moonlight. I could smell the sweat of us both and the distinct smell of combined juices. We stared at each other in awe and wonderment, emotions showing plainly on both our faces. It was long minutes before I could speak. Then at the same time, we both said, "WOW!" We smiled, no energy left for laughing.

 "Fox."

 "Umm?"

 "I need to move."

 "Oh, sorry." He gently slid out of me and I moaned and he smiled. He scooted down the bed, laying side by side, holding hands. We were both to hot right now to cuddle.

 "Dana, I could die a happy man right now." His voice held disbelief and awe. "Holy shit, that was ..."

 "Incredible? Fucking unbelievable? No pun intended." He did laugh now. 

Softly, "There are no words. That was ... no words." He smiled at his inability to express himself. 

"A religious experience." I stated.

 "yeah, it was. Dana, I love you so much. So much I can't even tell you, can't express it. God, you'll never know ..." 

"Yes I will because I feel the same way about you." I felt him squeeze my hand and saw a tear escape the corner of his eye.

 "I don't know what I'd do without you, Dana. I don't know if I could do anything without you. Do you understand that? You make me whole. You are a part of me. I didn't know it was possible to feel this much joy and at the same, I'm scared shitless."

 "I know. Me too. But fox, you don't have to do without me. I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere. And if you ever ditch me again, I will rip your heart out."

 "Promise?"

 "Promise."

 "But the Bureau..."

 "Kendra convinced me that it can work."

 "What?"

 "She said lots of agents are involved. No one else could put up with us and our lifestyle."

 "that's certainly true in my case."

 "I know lots of women who would put up with you."

 "I doubt it."

 "Weird or not, Fox, you ware a very sexy man, trust me when I tell you."

 "Well, I'm glad you think so. That's all that matters to me."

 "Kendra said as long as people are discreet, it works. The powers that be look the other way. In so many words she said they almost expect it. As long as no one embarrasses the bureau, they don't look to take people down, policy or no policy. They have to have one for cases of sexual harassment." 

"Bless Kendra McKenna." I chuckled.  

"yeah, she made me want to take a chance. Coaxed me out of my denial over my feelings for you."

 "So you talked about me?" He smiled to himself. Wonder how much she'll tell me?

 "We certainly did. She thought you were hot!" He laughed. 

"I only have eyes for you, Dana." 

"That's what she said."

 "Perceptive woman."

 "Indeed."

 "So what did you talk about?" 

"Well, it started with a joke."

 "The private joke you were laughing about and wouldn't share with me?" 

"Yes." 

"What was that all about?"

 "After you came in and startled me, she whispered to me."

 "I saw that. Couldn't hear."

 "She said, 'that's your partner, what a fox!'" 

He groaned. "Oh God!" 

"I said, funny you should mention it..." I giggled, remembering. "Then, you were watching us so intently, I broke off and started to scolding you for startling me. When you, when you, introduced yourself, and said Foox... Oh God." A fit of giggles overtook me as I remembered the stunned look on Kendra's face and her choked bark of laughter that she covered with a cough. It was as funny now, as it was then.

 "Dana! It's not that funny." 

"Yes it is, her, her expression...oh god, she wanted to kill me. It was hysterical." He smiled indulgently at me as I broke into another fit of laughter.

 "I love to hear you laugh," he said quietly. He rolled onto his side and kissed me gently.

 "I need a shower Mulder." 

"Fox." 

"Oh yeah, fox. That's going to take some getting used to. Are you sure?"  

"Only you, Dana, I want only you to call me by my first name. I love it when you say it."

 "I love you." 

"Ditto!"

 "What about work?" 

"If others are around, Mulder, but if we are alone, Fox." 

"Delicate balancing act you're asking for there. Lots of room for me to make a mistake, juggling the two."

 "Umm, like me juggling Scully and Dana?" 

"Yeah, huh?"

 "If you slip, you slip. No big deal."

 "Who are you anyway? Are you sure you're My Mulder?" He stared at my intently.

 "Am I? Your Mulder?

 "Yes, I hope so."

 "God, that sounds so good to hear you say that."

 "Am I Your Scully?"

 "I want you to be."

 "Wish granted." He beamed at me.

 "So, as long as we're figuring all this stuff out. What do I call you when someone asks what you are to me?"

 "What do you mean?" 

"Do I say, she's my significant other, my girlfriend, my lover, my partner, my life, my love?"

 "Am I all those things?"

 "Yes."

 "What do you want to call me?" 

"MINE! Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine," he declared in a sing song voice. I laughed again. I loved the playful Mulder. He didn't come out and play very often. 

"Call me whatever you want."

 So quietly, I almost didn't hear him, he whispered, "How about my fiancée?" 

I gasped. "What did you say?" 

"You heard me," he said softly. 

"Fox..."

 "Too soon. Sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. I just...sorry. One night with you and I'm turning into Don Quixoite. Just, forget I said it."

 "No." he looked up at me then. "You would really want to marry me?" 

"Yes. If I thought you would say yes, I'd give you a ring tomorrow." My eyes were stinging with tears.

 "Too much information, huh?" His chuckle was self-deprecating and he leaned over and licked my tear as it fell down my cheek. "Look, Dana. I'm rushing. No pressure here. Just think about it, for the future, if you think that's possible for us, somewhere down the road. I know I love you with everything I am. I know there will never be anyone else for me. I know that I want to spend the rest of my life with you by my side. I want to grow old with you and seven years of foreplay are plenty for me. But I'd have to know you were sure. That it was what you wanted too. I've just wanted you for so long, loved you for so long...my mouth got ahead of my brain. I forget that this is all new to you. Cause it's not new to me. In the meantime, I'll take whatever you'll give me. You set the pace."

 "No, it's not. New to me, I mean. I've loved you for along time too. I admitted that a long time ago. But I just accepted it yesterday."

 "I understand." 

"I don't think you do." 

"Explain to me then."

 "I'm tired of being so cautious. I'm tired of denying my feelings and running scared from them. I'm tired of worrying about what everybody thinks. I don't care anymore."

 "What are you saying, Dana?"

 "I'm saying that I feel the same way about you and I don't' want you to ever walk on eggshells around me ever again. Say what you think. I don't want to do a tip toe with other people, either, because I'm afraid for my fucking reputation. It's not important anymore. God, I've wasted so much time on this bullshit. You are important to me. You're happiness and mine are all that matters to me now."

 "The real world will invade, Dana, and you might change your mind once you're in a buttoned down suit and in front of Skinner, instead of laying naked in a bed with me."

 "No, I won't. This isn't post-coital meltdown. I refuse to have an 'uptight asshole relapse!'" He laughed. He shook his head, thumping it with the heel of his hand.

 "Is this Scully I'm talking to?" 

"No, this is Your Dana. The person I want to be. The Dana I'm committed now to being. The last 24 hours have been no less than a life-altering experience. Suddenly, it's all so clear to me. What's important in life."

 "What important? Let me rephrase that. What's important to you?" 

"Being with you, having someone to share my life with, loving and being loved in return. No job, no one's opinion, no career reputation is worth denying myself this kind of joy. I won't have it." I turned on my side to face him, cupping his face in my hands, his stubble scraping my palms. 

"WE, US, that's going to be my priority from now on. I think God put Kendra McKenna in my path for a reason and I'm not going to ignore the message." 

"And Kendra's purpose?"

 "To pull my head out of my ass and make me accept my love for you, to make me see my destiny, god's plan for me." 

"What's your destiny, Dana?" 

"YOU. To be with you, to live my life loving you the best I can." He sobbed and grabbed me into a crushing embrace. And the kissed me. I could never get enough of kissing him. He was so good at it. I'd been a fool to think I could ever put his man in just one compartment of my life. He was too large a force to contain.

 We broke for air and grinned at each other. 

"Wow." He was staring at me with that wonder struck look gain. 

"Yeah, Wow." 

"Shower?"

 "Yeah, shower." I rolled and went to leap off the bed. My feet hit the floor and I immediately realized my mistake. My knees were liquid, my thighs rubber and insides ached.

 "Oh," was all I got out before I crumpled to the carpet, catching myself on my forearms and grunting as I collapsed to the floor. "DANA, GOD!" he shouted and scrambled toward me, lunging off the edge of the bed. And immediately crumpling beside me as he knees buckled. "SHIT!"

 I snorted and we both broke out into peals of laughter as we rolled around on the rug, making clumsy attempts to stand. He blurted out, "Mission accomplished!" He was referring to fucking me until I couldn't walk. Another round of laughter took us over. At long last, recovered, helping each other up, still chuckling as we made our way gingerly to the bathroom. We showered, washing each other and enjoying just touching each other. We would catch other's eye and suppress giggles as we caught each other's overly careful movements. He shouted suddenly, "WOOO HOOO!" I smiled up at him, puzzled. 

"Fox?" 

"I don't remember ever being this happy, or ever laughing this much." 

"Me neither."

 We dried off and went back to the bed. He spooned me, wrapping his heat around my damp body, one arm under my head, the other around my waist, his large palm cupping my breast. I heard his even steady breaths and knew he had drifted off. 

Mulder was drowning in her warmth and the giddy feeling of being wrapped protectively around the love of his life. He was in the trance like state between waking and sleeping when he heard her begin whispering.

 "I love this, God, Mulder, how could I have been so stupid, not to reach out for this long ago. You'll never know how much I love you. My heart is in the palm of your hand and it always has been. And you don't even know it." She lightly kissed the inside of his wrist. 

He felt like his heart was going to bust out of his chest. This was better than any fantasy, it was a waking dream. Hearing Scully profess her love, thinking he was sleep. He'd never heard her this unguarded, all her barriers down. Her voice was sleepy and sated. "I never answered you, Fox, did I?" What was she talking about?

 "I'm not going to risk someone else taking you away from me." Not a chance, he thought. "Yes, I think I would like to be Mrs. Mulder." 

He swallowed his gasp, biting the inside of his mouth to be quiet. If she'd had eyes in the back of her head, she would have seen two hazel eyes snap open and stare incredulously at the back of her head. And she would have seen tears of joy streaming down her lover's face, his jaw hanging open in disbelief. But she didn't. She was already drifting off and beginning to dream of life with him. So she didn't hear his last words before he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.

 "Then you will be."

THE END

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