Bye Bye Bye

I'm doing this tonight
You're probably gonna start a fight
I know this can't be right
Hey baby come on

You fall into your anger and silence again, no matter how I smile to you, how I comfort you.
I've been thinking about us for a long time, about our relationship, about you and me. Though we've being together for quite a long time, still, I could not understand you, your anger, your fury.

I love you endlessly
When you weren't there for me
So now it's time to leave
And make it alone

Sometimes when you are not there with me, I tend to miss your existence.
Miss your icy cold eyes, miss the light cologne smell from your clothes, and miss your rare occasional happy mood.
But all these is too much for me.

I know that I can't take no more
It ain't no lie
I wanna see you out that door
Baby, bye, bye, bye

Somehow I feel really tired, and I really want to escape from it all. It is the thought of you, which dragged me back, again and again.
It is not until now, I feel that I could take no more.

Don't wanna be a fool for you
Just another player in your game for two
You may hate me
But it ain't no lie
Baby, bye, bye,bye

I feel, after all of these, I am being fooled, truly.
No matter how many times I told you how I loved you, there is never a single word from you. You let me kiss you, you let me hug you, but you never said, "I love you."
But I told you it didn't matter, and I truly believed that it didn't matter.
As long as I have you beside me, as long as you would call me name, I am satisfied.
We've been together for long, but still, I feel it hard to know your feelings.

Don't really wanna make it tough
I just wanna tell you that I had enough
Might sound crazy
But it ain't no lie
Baby, bye, bye, bye

I find, that the love I once had for you, the strong passionate love, is slowly fading away.
Perhaps it is still strong, perhaps it is still that feeling deeply rooted in me, but this love is too tired, too wary, too stressing that I can no longer feel it. What is left, is the bitterness, the stress, building up like a big black hole, never to be filled up.
I've had enough of all these.

You just hit me with the truth
Now you're more than welcome to
So give me one good reason
Baby, come on

You are, headstrong, and insensitive, just like a child. You do everything in your own desire, and you never care about other people's feelings. You get angry over trivial matters, and you are a difficult one when you get angry.
Perhaps you need care, you need love, but you never want to show this need.
You need too much, yet you pretend that you need nothing.
That's why your feelings are so hard to capture. Now I finally understand.

I lived for you and me
And now I've really come to see.
That life would be much better
Once you're gone

I thought my life would be dull without you.
Even since the first time I saw you, I reckoned that the whole meaning of my life was to love you. For me, to love is to give without want any return.
However, it is too tiresome.
I thought life without you has no meaning, but the truth is laying out there: being alone is better than living with you.

I know that I can take no more
It ain't no lie
I wanna see you out that door
Baby, bye, bye, bye

Being together with you for so long, I am getting tired, warier, feeling no happiness, but more exhaustion.
The happiness I once owned , was broken, broken pathetically into little pieces.
And, finally, I made up my mind.
It is time to throw everything away, the burden, the worries, the scars and the pain.

I'm giving up I know for sure
I don't wanna be the reason for you love no more
Bye, bye
I'm checking out
I'm signing off
I don't wanna be the loser
And I've had enough

Once I made up my mind. I no longer will change.
Broke things cannot be mended, scars cannot be erased away, and pains are left eternal.
I told you all, you were silent, as usual.
But when you rise your head, I saw tears streamed down from your eyes.
I don't wanna be a fool
In this game for two
So I'm leaving you behind
bye, bye, bye

Nothing matters anymore, nothing will change, nothing can mend up the broken pieces.
Even your tears.
Do you have someone else? You asked me.
No one, no one apart from you. Being with you, we two are together, leaving you, it is only me, perhaps will be one solitary soul for a lifetime.

I don't wanna make it tough
But I had enough
And it ain't no lie
bye, bye

All is enough, enough for my heart.
So I chose to be alone, chose to be a solitary soul.
Because, though I still love you, my heart has too much scar and pain.
Now perhaps I know you feeling, but it is too late, too late. Broke pieces cannot be mended, and you don't know much about healing a pain.

Don't wanna be a fool for you
Just another player in your game for two
Don't wanna be your fool
But it ain't no lie
Baby, bye, bye, bye

I looked at your icy eyes for one more time.
Tears filled up in my eyes too.
But I won't look back again.
I am going to throw away everything. And I stepped out of the door.

Don't really wanna make it tough
I just wanna tell you that I've had enough
It may sound crazy
But it ain't no lie
Baby, bye, bye, bye

Perhaps, giving this up is the best thing for me to do.
I love you, and I still love you, and I will love you till eternity.
But I can't stay with you, I was too badly wounded that I could no longer feel the wound inside me
And the wound was too deep that you love can no long heal it.
So I decide to leave, bring with me nothing but the broken fragments of memory of you and me.
My dearest Rukawa, bye, bye, bye.



2000© Cindy