"Where were you?" Dinah asked after Noah opened his door to her. He frowned, stepping aside for her to enter.  

"Where were you?" He returned not wanting to tell her exactly where he had been the night of Luke's wedding. It was enough that he had to be rescued by Jory Conlan. Jory and his endless cracks about being "in the closet." Humiliating. Embarrassing.  

"I was late for the wedding because Dad had an emergency at the hospital. But Mom and I got to the reception in time for that big scene. Who saw that coming? I looked for you, but I didn't see you."

"You weren't at the wedding, so I blew off the reception," he lied. "I was tired anyway." He didn't wait for Dinah to reply but went back to his books. The new semester was coming up and he had a lot of catching up to do. One more year, he thought, until Medical School. Better be ready.

"You could've called me to let me know," she pouted. "I mean you should have seen the look Piper was giving me. All smug because she was there with her boyfriend. Disgusting."

"Somehow I doubt that," he answered barely looking up from his book. "You worry about what Piper thinks too much."

"I do?" Dinah crossed her arms over herself and glared at him. She seemed ready for a fight, he thought wearily. He so didn't need this. "What about you? You seem to care more about her feelings than I do half the time!"

"What is your problem Dinah?" He snapped at last, slamming his book shut. "Did you come over here to yell at me? Because I don't think I want to hear it just now." Dinah sighed and dropped her defensive posturing. Slumping on the couch next to him, she sighed.

"I'm sorry. I thought you were avoiding me for some reason," she said after a moment.

"I'm not. Look, Dinah, I've got to get some studying done tonight. Could we continue this later?" He asked, catching the hurt look on her face. Couldn't be helped, he thought. He was in no mood for this.

"Sure. You'll call me?"  

"Yes." He didn't look up though, only reopened his book. She kissed his head and went to the door opening it just as Dusty arrived home. "Hi Dusty, see you around," she said, leaving quickly. He dropped the book on the couch at her departure and sighed with relief.

"What's with Miss Girlfriend?" Dusty asked, dropping into a chair in front of the TV. "She sure left in a hurry."

"I asked her to go. I've got studying to do."

"What? It's Christmas break...oh wait!" Dusty's face brightened with delight. "You're tired of her! Aren't you?" She couldn't suppress the giggle that erupted. "Aw poor Noah! you're so sad! Pining after that Piper, aren't' you?"

"I am not."

"Then why were you in the Conlan's pantry?" An amused sparkle lit her eyes.

"How do you know about that?" He demanded. She shrugged, grinning with amusement.

"I overheard Jory tell Maura at Connie's today. What's the matter? Piper embarrassed to be seen with you?"

"No. That asshole Chase locked me in there. She didn't want him to see me so I hid in the pantry but he locked the door on his way out."

Dusty clapped a hand over her mouth suppressing the laugh that threatened. "Oh I think I have a whole new respect for this Chase guy. I might have to meet him."

"Stay away from him," Noah warned his sister. "He's dangerous. I just wish Piper would wake up and realize that."


Scene 2:

"Quite a scene at the Masons the other night." Phoebe glanced up at him, her eyebrows raised.

"Don't let Dane hear you talk about it," she warned. "He's still upset about the whole thing. He told me that the whole family is just crushed by it."

"Oh? Is Dane sharing personal feelings with you now?" Rick asked, grinning. It was well known around the Observer offices that Dane was infatuated with Phoebe Cameron and had been since the day he met her. "Is it serious?"

"Very funny." She scowled darkly at him. It was also common knowledge that Phoebe couldn't stand the guy. "What do you want Rick?"

"I need your help."

"With what? I'm swamped with the New Year special edition. You'd think we could run something a little more interesting than, 'Change Your Life in 2002.' Who came up with that?"

"I did. Thank you for your vote of confidence," Rick replied dryly, closing the door gently. "But what I need your help on is something private." He fished into his breast pocket and took out the picture he had taken from Maura's room, wondering if she had discovered that it was missing yet. "How are you at finding information on people?"

"The best. That's why you hired me remember?"  

"What if it's a kid I need information on? Could you do that?" He laid the picture on the desk and pushed it towards her. Phoebe hesitated for a moment but picked it up and studied it, turning it over and reading the name on the back.

"Who is Tristen Ford?" She asked, her eyes guarded as she waited for a response.  

"That's just it. I don't know. But someone I know does but I can't very well just ask her..."

"Does this have something to do with Jillie?"  

"No."  

Phoebe's eyes narrowed. "Maura? Christ, Rick, let it go. You have a girlfriend. Leave your ex alone."

Rick folded his arms stubbornly, standing his ground. "I won't. Maura is hiding something and I want to know why."

"How do you know she's hiding something?"

"She hid that picture. And I know her. It's got to be the reason she blew me off the other day," he explained. When Maura had collapsed in his arms, he'd been scared all right. Scared for her and for himself. But when she'd asked for him, it didn't seem to matter anymore. What mattered was that she wanted him. At last. Somehow, though, it had all gone back to the way it had been before she fell ill. He was at square one again but this time he had something. Something she had been hiding. And his gut told him it had to do with him. Of course, he would follow up. What other choice was there?

"Okay, may I remind you yet again," Phoebe said, the exasperation showing plainly on her face and in her voice. "You, Rick Upton. You have a girlfriend. Her name is Jillie Conlan. Not Maura Conlan. What could you possibly hope to gain by digging into Maura's life? Nothing. But I'll tell you what you stand to lose. Jillie. She doesn't strike me as very tolerant you know. I think if you mess with her sister, she's liable to walk. You want to lose her too?"

"I won't. Will you help me or not?" Phoebe studied the picture again, but nodded slowly. She could always be counted on when a challenge arose. "Thank you, Phoebe. I owe you."

"More than you know," she replied sourly. "More than you know."


Scene 3:

Maura moved through the diner, nodding hello, stopping to chat with the regulars, doing what she normally did. For once, it was a welcome relief. She'd spent the last few days comforting Jude over the sudden revelation that Gwen and James Mason were his natural parents. And though she truly didn't mind, it was time for her own life to take over once more. She left Jude after breakfast, when he reassured her for the tenth time that he would go to Four Winds and collect his belongings. They had agreed that there was no way he could stay there after what happened. He would move to a townhouse ME owned for visiting investors until he found a more suitable place. He had a plan, and, as far as Maura was concerned, a plan was the first step in the right direction.

Her round over, she made her way back to the bar, happy to be behind it once again, enjoying the teasing her father incurred and the genial way the regulars tried to drag her into it. She looked at her wristwatch. Dinner crowd be in soon, and Jude would be back from Four Winds as well. She did do her best to comfort him. But she felt sorry for Gwen Mason, though she knew no one else in town would. Of course, Maura had given up her own child as well, she could sympathize.

"Maura." Her name startled her out of her thoughts. Glancing up, she locked eyes with Jamie Mason. She wondered when he would surface. As far as he could tell, he'd been in hiding too. He looked tired though. She couldn't blame him. Jude didn't sleep much, she learned last night. It made sense that his...brother would deal with stress much the same way.

"Hello Jamie," she said pleasantly, shoving the tired, worried tone away. "How are you?"

He raised his eyebrows, giving her a sardonic gaze. "I am peachy, Maura. It's been a banner week for the Mason family."

"Okay. No need to be nasty. I was trying to be sincere," she returned. God, he could be an ass, she thought.  

"You're right," he said, the expression fading away. "I'm sorry. It has been a pretty rotten week though."

"Yes, it has," she replied evenly. She pulled out her order book and started making a mental inventory of the things she would need to order after New Years was finally over. She would have to order up as well just to make sure there was enough for the St. Patrick's Day Bash Kevin insisted on throwing every year.

"I need to know how he's doing, Maura." She didn't look up. It wasn't her place to tell after all.  

"So call him. He's got a cell phone," she answered. A cell phone that had been turned off for the last week.  

"I have and I've left twenty messages at least. He doesn't seem to want to talk to me."

She sighed and laid her pencil down, marking her place in her order book. "Don't take it personally. He hasn't left my house since the wedding. Jamie, you've got to give him a little room to adjust to this."

"Has he told you how close we always were?" Jamie asked, ignoring her advice.

"He didn't have to. Anyone with eyes can see how loyal he is to you."

"And I am just as loyal to him. I've always thought of him as a brother and now he is exactly that. I want him to know that I won't desert him."  

"But you aren't even the issue here," Maura told him, point blank. "The fact is that Gwen, your mother, gave him away but kept you. I know you can't understand that. I don't even fully understand it. Jude is feeling as unloved as anyone I have ever met. He's angry and sad and doesn't know what to do with himself. He can't go to work because he thinks every one is staring at him, and they likely are. He hasn't left the house because he doesn't want to see people pointing at him."

"I can protect him from all of that. He just has to let me."

"Jamie you sound like a petulant child. Let Jude deal with this how he has to. Okay? "

"I won't walk away from him. I won't let him be the one who gets hurt. I promise." Maura sighed, picking her pencil up again.

"That's very noble, Jamie. But he is already hurt. And you can't help him."


Scene 4:

He didn't sleep much. How could he? After the wedding, it was all Jude could do to just be. He couldn't quite bring himself to go to the office. Surely, everyone in town knew now. He didn't want staring eyes on him all day. And he most certainly did not want the whispering. The Conlans had been kind allowing him to stay in their home but it was time to leave. He had a home...or he had a home at one point. He couldn't live there now. But it was time to collect his belongings at least.

Four Winds was mostly quiet when he arrived. He saw a few of the staffers scuttle out of his way when they saw him. But no family members appeared right away. All for the better, he thought. He hadn't even talked to Jamie since that night and he wasn't sure how he would react when he did. He pulled his suitcases from the closet and began the tedious job of packing his clothes into them.

"They wondered when you would be back," Ellen said from the doorway. He didn't bother to look up. "I said you'd at least be back to get your clothes. I mean, you can only hide at the Conlan's for so long before you need clean underwear, right?"

He paused for a moment but didn't look up. "I'm not hiding," he replied quietly.

"No? What would you call it then?" Ellen stepped inside the room, leaving the door open behind her. "Look, Jude, I think the whole thing is pretty awful too. But we're still family. Though we're even closer than we were before."

"No, we aren't."

"How can you say that? You're...well, you're my brother!" She beamed at him, the pleasure of her announcement evident on her face. "Doesn't that count for anything? I mean, I've always thought of you as my brother but now it's nice to know you really are!"

"I know you're sincere, Ellie. But you of all people should know that I can't just be ecstatic to be a "Mason." I feel like my whole life has been a lie. From start to finish. Or is that not what you wanted to hear me say?" He asked, closing the first suitcase. He went to the closet and found his wardrobe bag, laying it open on the bed to pack his suits.

"Jude, I want you to say that being my brother will make you happy," Ellen replied. "Maybe it won't be all roses and rainbows just yet, but maybe in a while you would be okay with being Jude Mason?"

"There is no Jude Mason. I'll never be Jude Mason, Ellen. Gwen decided who would be allowed to be a Mason and I wasn't one of them, so don't ask me to be that man."

"I'm not asking you to be him. But couldn't you at least be part of the family? Do you have to run away from us like we're the bad guys? Jamie and I didn't do anything to you. And I know Mother isn't an angel..."

"Ellen, you of all people shouldn't be rushing to her defense!" Jude snapped, throwing a suit on the bed. "Don't come to me preaching forgiveness when you couldn't forgive her for what you thought she had done!"

"That's different! I thought she hurt Daddy! You know how I felt about my father!" Her face turned scarlet with emotion. Jude nodded, turning to face her completely.

"And you know what? He was my father too. But Gwen denied me of that. She denied me of knowing Uncle James as my father."

"Uncle Doug was good to you though. He loved you."

"I know he did. In his own way." No one knew how hard Douglas Fontaine had made Jude work for his love though. Not Jamie, not Ellen, not Gwen. He had only recently shared how difficult Douglas was with Maura. But even she would never fully understand. "But you got unconditional love from your father. My father...Douglas," he choked out, "was only able to love me after years of trying. I knew something was wrong when I was five, Ellen. I should have been allowed to know a man who would love me because I was his. Not because someone made a mistake."

"Yes, she made a mistake! And mistakes deserve to be forgiven, don't they?"

"I can't believe you would ask me that..."

"I don't need forgiveness. I never asked for it and I don't want it," Gwen interrupted from the doorway.

On the next Episode of Secret Horizons...

Episode 72