It's my first paper today!

Sian...others already went through 2-3 paper and left 2 more while i still got 3 paper to go. Well the bio paper wasn't as hard as the online quizzes but i still find myself dikum'ing several questions cos of the time lacked. Hai...It's open book exam so i think i wasted a lot of time flipping thru the book.

Btw, my body temperature is 37.2. Haha, safe! The person who took my temperature is a friendly medic student. But i'm too weak or maybe too stress to reply to his cheerful greeting. Dunno why i feel so exhausted since morning till now.

After getting temperature measured, still have to chop stamp hand to indicate 'Clear'. It's just remind me of those *safe* porkies lying down there in the wet markets.

Th Sars seems to be getting out of hand day-by-day. Thanks to that 8 selfish and inconsiderate people who wandered around the neighbourhood area. Now i have to put off the chalet that i had planned for May. Mum's been nagging me how i should stay home during this period of time. Think the plan of getting a decent vacation job will have to go also.

On a light note: I find this from my school's BBS. Supposedly a lecturer wrote this. Just to share with you.

You know why New Changi Hospital(NCH) changed its name to Changi General
Hospital (CGH)? Because NCH stands for "Never Come Home". That's why
business was very bad before it changed its name. Now CGH stands for
"Can Go Home". So business is picking up.

Business in Singapore General Hospital(SGH) is still going strong
because SGH stands for "Sure Go Home"!

Now National University Hospital(NUH) is also considering a name change.
It stands for "No Use Hospital"!

What about Tan Tock Seng Hospital (TTSH). Not too good name, no wonder so
much problem. It stands for "Tiam Tiam Si Hospital" and now 'Tan Teo SAR
Hospital".

So, be careful which hospital you want to go if you are unwell.

Hm...I can hear the protest from my stomach. Guess i have to stop now and make myself a nice warm cup of cereal drink. Cozy esp in this kind of weather(raining + thundering). Before i go, here's some eyecandies for you.

This is the avartar i used in FlowerPod forum. Cute rite?

The mini cake i ate on my birthday morning.

I haven't been celebrating birthday ever since i was like 8 or 9 years old. This year's different. 21 years old liao. This is fruit cake (Thanks sis for this! I love you muak! ) i ate for supper. I din wish for anything. Too old for it now.

There's still another cake iate during afternoon which is a swiss roll. Din have the photo. Oh man, I'm had been caking all the day! No wonder i find my pants abit tight today.

Yeah! I'm 21 today!!!

Congratulate myself! Yah, today marks the 21 years of my existence. I'm officially stepping into adulthood. Have to be careful in signing contract from today onward cos it will be counted. BY's the first one to sms me greeting, followed by CH, ZY and MY! BY, you a little bit early though(1159 on 20/4). Hee hee! Now busy returning msg...

Well although there is not much celebration going to happen, chalet planning 's going underway. Hopefully, the SARS situation won't get worse or else I can't get to book the duplex room at east coast resort.

Hmm...sometime i think that the one who should celebrate bday should be my mother instead becuase she is the one who gave birth after ten months. 21 years ago, I, an innocent creature, had already cause great pains to my mum when she went for her first Caesarian section. (I guess I'm too gigantic to turn over in the womb) It's more painful than any other ordinary labour ordeal because the technology that time was still not as good as today's.

Want to thank my mum for bringing me up prim and proper these years. I know that It's not an easy process. I have my rebellious and mischevious streak now and then. I just want to say " I love you Mum, always!"

The birthday girl is returning to her bio book now.

On my Birthday's unattainable Wishlist!

Hmm....

Try out this quiz here. Here's mine result!

You are a Koala!

Cuddly and snuggly. You love romance and being pampered by a partner. Candle-lit dinners, red roses and soft, moody music all set the perfect tone for you. In bed you're very sensual and eager to give your partner as much as they give you. You love sex but it isn't a major priority in your relationships. You're at your happiest being cradled in your partner's arms.

It's my grandma's 49th day

Just returned from my grandpa house. Dad woke me at 9am...*Grunt* So tired...8 hours sleep not enough for me nowadays leh.

Burned massive paper money and paper furniture for grandma at the roadside. Can feel the hot flame even from a distance. Can imagine the terror of those who perished in the fire.

It's gonna be a blast at my block. Not that some party are going to happen but i do notice that there is a chinese taoism/buddhism funeral at the back of my block, the setting up of a temporay cover for an indian festival this evening on the left and a chinese Getai on the right. Woohoo..."Surround sound stereo" Hope they will continue making noise till as late as possible. I like nosiness especially while i'm in the middle of intense study.

Has added in Comment feature "Green Apple". Feel free to critise/praise me. Going to rebuild my webby using more sophiscated way this coming long vacation. Stay tune.

Revision starts today

Went to Power Supply at Somerset to fill up some application forms with YY and MY. Hopefully, they have vacancies and we all work together. It's so boring working especially with wrong age groups.

Exam coming real soon. The paper is on 25 April and the last one on 5 May. Somehow the mood is still no here yet. Next monday is my 21st birthday. Nothing much happening since most of my friends are having cs3264 paper on that day. Hm...probably find myself burying my head into the bio textbook. But at least hope to dine at Goodwood hotel with my parents. Yah quite a pathetic way to celebrate 21st birthday right?

Went to buy a bday card for BY after what It have done wonders to me when i recieve one from two good friends. (I used to keep greeting cards/letter/postcards and has collected a gigantic bag of those. However, these days i receive none so collection has come to a stop...) It is never my habit to remember someone's bday. Somehow i want to have a change this year since everyone will turn 21 this year. So i start diggin' out those old autographs and contact lists and enter each birthdates into my nokia 8520 for reminders. BTW if you're thinking of sending me a greeting card, note that I prefer the physical ones to virtual ones!

Some blogger has thought of getting conch piercing for 21th birthday present. I think it's quite very cool and beautiful, better than getting tattoos (Tattoos are ugly!!! It does injustice to skin!). But i never have the courage to go for it. The image of blood splashing all over the place during the gunning would have done enough to deter me.

While searching for pic of conch piercing, I also accidentally saw labia piercing. Myfirst reaction was "Ouch Ouch Ouch!!!" It's freaked me out totally. What is in the earth that made people torture their body for such a unsightly(hidden) body art?

Ok folks, i gota start my revision now. Time running out. Won't be returning often. Meanwhile i'm contemplating over organising a chatlet at East Coast during May. Just scared that no one wants to come because of SARS. You wanna come along?

Job searching day

Went to employment agencies at Tanjong Pagar with my best pal. Better than last year's situation whereby temp job seekers were rejected by most agencies. But the funny thing is that quite a handful of agencies have put up notice at their front door that those who been to TTSH or have flu/fever symptons aren't allowed to enter. The first agency that we go was Business trend on 33th floor. (Btw, i have phobia of taking lifts to such a high level. I guess I get this from taking too much flights. Yah it'a the other way for me. People get more comfortable with every additional flight. I'm opposite. Yah I'm so chicken. But i still can't forget my dream that occured before SIA incident.) Alas,I found out that my typing speed is 45 wpm using a software at the agency. Not used to the Desktop's keyboard. Could be faster if it is the laptop's.

Quite tired ..We went through 10+ agencies. There are interviews done so i think it not that bad as last year. Or probably we are the early birds looking for May jobs.

Accompanied my friend to Far East Plaza. Surprised when she pulled me to the base floor. I din realise the neat clutter of funky/styliish shops over there. Oh gosh, how long have i not come out from my cocoon? Since last year? Was nagging my friend to return home quickly cos i need to debug the software program for tml presentation. Somehow, I now just wanted to linger on window shopping...Just while my friend decided on a pair of silver-rhinestoned black flip flops, my dad called and i couldn't stay on longer. hmm....this trip actually motivates me to find a job and earn money to splash on luxury items. Hope my parents dun read this. Or else they will start ranting, "In such bad economy blah blah blah..". Actually, i have to train myself to find clothes of my preference. I'm too dependent on my mum's opinion.*Shame Shame* Gonna make my way back there after the exam are over.

One more place which i haven't been is Muji@bugis...It seems to be a favourite spot among the flower podders...Somehow after exam, must also make my way there to see.

So it's the IRAQ war, then the SARS. Now it's Leslie Chueng's plunge.

I am never his fans. But his death leave me shocked and sad. At first I thought Meirong is playing an April fool joke on me when she told me on phone. I have never recognised his talents in singing (Currently playing: Sheng qing xiang yong) and acting until now. Also surprise when my mum reveal that she quite admire him. (My mum has always disencouraged us from having celebrity idols.)

I din get any industrial attachment. *Darn*. I went for second balloting then realise the choice i made isn't good at all. Regretted. Hope i din get any offer from this balloting. Plan to go to agencies next week and get an IT job preferably for experience purposes. I've been looking through the job listing and many require IT skills not taught in NUS. Have i chosen a wrong path? Really hate what I'm doing now. Work like slave for a piece of not-so-useful certificate. It's not the kind of life that i want. So now my mum has been taunting me for not listening to her advice at first. Even if i do, i would not enter teaching career.

Been skipping sleep nowsday to do programming. Initially at the start of the semester, thought that having a guy in the project would help to lessen the work load. It's always the guys better than the gals in such area. But it's totally opposite. Whenever, my leader gave him task to do. It's either he pushes it away, saying he's busy with other modules or he dunno how to do. What kind of attitude? It's not as if we are very free or super zai ppl. He even have the face to say we make it unhappy for him. All bullshit. How did he manage to get into university? God knows only.

This week, i have been living terribly. The IT marketing presentation is one of the disastors for me though not so bad as other groups who got scolded by the rude lecturers and proposals got creamed! I guess we are the 3rd group so they're not strict. Yesterday's quiz is horrible. I leave the questions blank. As for e-commerce presentation, the tutor knew we were just passing time by giving him some rubbish stuff. He's right. Coolz man...

It only occured to me yesterday that i should have taken cs3266 instead of cs3261. At least for the next 3 months vacation, i can work as freelance website designer. Hai, it nearly the end of semester!

Netscape & KazzaLite

Been tucking in at weird hour at 4am during these days. Bad for health and face! Got primple outbreak. Hate it! Dare not join the crowd in the public. SAR Fear. Not especially when my immune system is not functioning at full blast. Heard that 2 people had died of SAR. I doubt the official will release the news. The people here may get paranoid. But i think it's for good reason.

I used to use Netscape back in the good old days when i just got my internet connection. If i remember correctly, it's 1995. But when IE comes up with more userfriendly features, I abandoned Netscape. It has never cross my mind to install Netscape on my machine ever since then. In fact it's not just me. When my e-commerce lecturer asked anyone using Netscape, no one put up hand. I even laughed at my friend who still using it. It sounds backward.

Not until i saw Netscape 7.0 browser on my project mate's laptop. The interface is far nicer than IE. You can select different themes you want. I'm using Toystation theme now. Even the default 'Modern' theme look futuristic. I like the 3D buttons very much. I was reading Catherine's blog when I decided to capture this shot. I like all her sheep graphics. Plan to rekindle my artistic flame during this coming May.

I find some features quite convienient like I dun have to type in password to enter IVLE anymore. Another plus point is that Netscape allows you to open multiple browser in its tab. There won't be confusing buttons in your window toolbar when you're having several browsers. But sometime, pictures and other elements can't be loaded nicely.

Few days ago, I downloaded a software KazaaLite. I can now find the stuffs i want easily. Since I'm practically online everyday for my assignments, it surprised my friend when she realised i know nothing about Kazaa thingy in the first place. Now, i'm practically downloading stuffs like mp3, mtv and movies everynow and then.

It's another tiring day!

What you are going to read maybe detrimental to your mental. It's practically long long log of my today's ongoing stuffs.

Woke up at 8am. Din wake dad to fetch me to school. Scared of going through another round of nagging of how I should keep the receipt from the UPS man for a period of time. We recieved an UPS bill yesterday evening. Strangely, i had paid exact cash upon the delivery of goods. Very angry. I have high expection for international delivery firms yet, it lets me down terribly by commiting such a stupid blunder. UPS, YOU SUCK!!! :(

Reached school at 10am. Chase two buses in a morning. Rushing through my marketing report. Sad to say, upon the time of submission there are still a lot of loop holes which we are unable to cover. I can foresee how my group is going to be shamed infront of the who-think-they-are-the-only-smart-guys-and-drive-BMWs cum part-time lecturers. Expect the scene from American Idol to re-emerge during the presentation.

Intend to go to Biology lect at 12pm because the new lecturer quite funny and also today's topic is of my interest. I alway like to learn more about animals' behaviour. Have I told you that if I'm an angmoh living in the west with lush forests,, i would choose to study in the field of nature. Hai, i guess it's fated that i stick to computers. Was walking all the way from engineer blk e4 UPHILL to the bustop to take a bus to lt7 when suddenly recieved a call from my friend that the LT is fulY occupiedl. My buddy is late too. In end we had our lunch at beanies' cafe (I not sure it's correct, i can't recall exactly) at YIH.

Returned to the technoprenuership office to continue the marketing report at 1pm. Rushed back to SOC for e-commerce tutorial at 3pm to do presentation. All these place shifting in NUS is done under scorching 35 degree hot sun. Despite that fact, my parents went fishing this afternoon again. (Can you believe that they do this for consecutive 3 days!!!) My mum, who is of fair complexion (which she has alway been proud of) is now looking like a burned crab. How much fish have they caught I don't know. My mum refused to tell me whether the fish I ate just now was the one which they caught from the sea.

That tutorial ended at 4 which thereafter i make my way to comp lab to print the-half- finished-but-had-to-submit report. The people around me in the lab are doing the same time. They are so frantic in finishing the report and got this loud guy who keep calling his friends to hurry up and doing a countdown for his entire group. What the rush man? I sure desmond won't be cruel to deduct mark for late submission.

All along i was having problem with microsoft office cos whenever i sent print job it will hang. I tried 4 computers across two lab still the same problem. When the complete copy is finally out, it's already 5.30pm, way past the deadline. We even have the thick skin to ask desmond for punchers and file rings. We did the bindings infront of him and get him to mark the uglier version while the more perfect copy to be given to the lecturer for marking.

Waited more than 15 min for bus 95 at 6 plus. Almost zzz off in the bus 105. Kept nodding my head off when in semi-conscience state. The aunty sitting beside me was shocked by my 'attacks'. Reached toa payoh at 7 plus. Still can have energy to go Popular. Was browsing through the CDs. The CD cover of Rong Zhu Er Joey caught my attention. I like her hair style especially. Where can i get such hairstyle?

Went to Lee Wah. This is my second trip down to buy makeup products. Ladies' money are easy to earn from, especially the younger one. Eg. in my case:

First trip recent i bought:
1. Maybelline Lash Dicovery $11.90
2. Lipice Color Gloss Pearl Pink $5.90
3. Kelly Shimmering Blue Eyeshadow $3.50
4. Pond's Cold Cream $5.20
5. Blusher Brush $1.90
6. Eye Shadow Brush $1.90
Total: $30.30

Second recent trip i bought:
1. Kelly Shimmering Brown Eyeshadow $3.50
2. Kelly Shimmering White Eyeshadow $3.50
3. Kose UV 20 SPF 2 Way Foundation $18.90 (Offered price)
Total: $25.90

Makeup products which I already possess:
1. Loreal SPF15 Liquid Foundation - Too dark for my skin
2. Red Earth Lip stick - Pink
3. Loreal Shock Resist Nailpolish - Candy Pink
4. Sally Hansen Nailpolish Remover
5. Powder

Wow, only for one presentation, I spent $56.20. (Note, i may not use the products until god knows when) I will be doomed if my mum knows this. Actually all these products not that branded but can cost so much already. I dun make up even for big occassion unless it's REQUIRED in some events like my dancing ECA back in sec, harmonica in jc and CS2103 Business communcation presentation. Yah I'm such a pathetic case. But maybe becuase impulse buying is an outlet for my bundled stress.

OMG!

I been browsing through some forums at SearchSg in between breaks apparently i'm too bored by the report which i suppose to complete today. i was reading ongoing posts under the topic SG haunts.

I was totally shocked! They mention about hearing marbles hitting the floor in the middle of the night (My hair's standing now!!!) It takes me a while to realise that it's happening in my house too. Yah, sometime when i was about to enter the my dreamland or burning midnight oil, I would hear the marbles thudding from above. But I have never take much notice about until now.Come to think of it, why would people play marbles in the middle of night apart from being inconsiderate? They say that constructors put marbles in between the levels of hdb flats for the ghosts to play. Is that true?

Yesterday night, when i was the only one still awake and alone in my room doing my marketing report, i hear one of the chairs in my living room moves.Actually I'm quite used to it. There are alway some unexplainable things happenings around my home. My family know there is ONE MORE living under the same roof. Even my friends who visit my house said it like haunted. Cos' My house's quite dark even in the day! Sound pretty creepy rite?

I'm actually quite timid. Whenever I alone at home, i will try to stay in my home with my headphone booming loud music. I just don't want know what is going around me. One of my bad habits: after the sun sets, i move around the house switching all the lights which lies along my path. I'm one of those who hate complete darkness.

My heart's healed. It's time to let go...I want to be free too...

Other than the 'fish slices thick noodle' as my breakfast i haven't had my dinner until now...should be called supper. I think this kind of lifestyle sucks...

I'm not the kind of person who is suited to pen down my deepest thoughts which only purpose is to entertain you. I created this for a sake of doing. I name my blog as Senseless cos i know i will talk more craps than senses. You see, I'm using something to make myself learn html. I'm just following the crowd. I just excited because I learning something practical and new. I'm finding troublesome to think of something 'revealable' for expossure. I'm much of private person. Let see how long can i blog. Or will i ever develop an interest or maybe a habit of bloggin'? I will have to wait to find out.

IA is out for bidding. Was browsing through the list. Most of them required skills which i lack. I worried it will be the same thing when i graduate. But somehow their projects seem so huge...how do they manage within the three months or rather how the students learn? Heard that some students been treated like admin workers. Cheap labour..

I just think my driving license is for display purpose. Everytime my dad fetch me, I just chicken out. That's all for tonight. Listening to "The Return to Innocence" whenever stressed. Yah now stressing. Have to complete marketing report by today

Ok, so this is my nagging!

I just have my apt2. I don't even bother to study for this test after what has happened during apt1. I missed only 0.5 marks to be exempted from repeated tests(There is a total of 4 apt). Well the total marks for the initial test is 30. i happened to get 15. Thought I could be free. Oh boy, I was wrong. Just don't understand the significance of that 0.5 point when that professor decided to push the red line up to 15.5! *Damn*

So happily I studied for apt1. After sitting through the test, i thought that i could clear it which mean i don't have to go for further tests. Oh ho, I was wrong the twice time. I missed a "=" just because I was too confident that my loop is flawless. This mistake churn out another mistake. Ok. 2 mistakes. Not much but that professor decided that more than 1 mistake will have to resit. What's the point of having re-test? Just one or two minor mistakes doesn't imply our programming skill. I doubt those who needn't sit for apt test could not make the mistakes that we do. Again I miss by just one mistake. If this carries on to the last(4th) apt, the same marks is deducted no matter you got 2 mistakes or 10 mistakes, is it fair to say that your java knowledge is of the same standard as those who did really poor.

So i decided that i won't study for next test. Just make as much mistake as i can to make it worth well. Rebellious? Stupid? Maybe. But who has the time to go and revised the cs1101 text? We can alway refer to the textbook and API for the syntax while doing the project. Anyway, i got the question of inheritance for apt2. Has made more than 1 mistake liao. So now i shall wait for the next apt3...

A break finally!

Manage to catch a mini-break before another cycle of hectic schedules. Just had my e-commerce mcq test this afternoon. Made lotsa mistakes. Blame the ambiguous lectures notes given.

Finding the weather too hot to settle down comfotably for some academic reading, I cleared my desk instead which has been in a state of disarray for weeks. The red packets at one corner of my cupboard caught my attention. I have opened not a single one of them up to see the amount of money inside. This goat year's not much harvest. Most of mum's side relatives went for holidays while my family got stuck in hot! rainy! hot! Singapore.

Immediately, i know that one pair of slightly bulky hongbaos is from my grandparents. It's been almost 2 weeks since my grandma passed away. Pancreatic cancer, she suffered for 6 months. I still remember the day when i woke up with shock that something foreboding is gonna happened to grandma. That same afternoon, my grandma is diagnosed with cancer. That sunday night when my whole family visited her at NUH in the morning, her conditions took a worst turn. I heard from my father that she prayed to Guanying and other gods to give her 2 more days. On Wednesday (26 Feb), my father called to inform us that she won't last more than 12 hours. We decided to go to the hospital together to pay our last visit during the evening whereby my sister would return from school. We didn't make it. She took her last breath at around 4 p.m.

All along, I did not visit her (except the Sunday's trip when she already don't recognise us) despite the fact that she hospitalised at NUH since the chinese new year and also my school (SOC) is within walking distance to the hospital. My father would ask me whether I want to visit her but i alway pushed it to another day cos I was tied down with the projects and tests. If my mum would have told me earlier (Don't ask me how she know. I'm not sure whether i can tell it here) that my grandma would pass away anytime after the lunar 15th day of first month passes,(ie after the chinese new year) i would have placed more priority on the visit.

My relationship with my grandma is not close. Imagine that I only visit my grandparents once a year. It's Er2 Xi2 Fu3 and Jia1 Po2 issue. I'm not going to talk about this. It would take another entire page. When i was very very young, I used to have sleepover at my grandparents' home, helpout and nap at their stall where they fried Chao2 Guo2 Tiao2 in ABC market for a living. My memory involving my father's side is quite limited. I guess it's the detachment which did not movtivate me to visit her frequently. *A sense of guilt*

Enough about the sad stuff. It has to be a thing of the past. Here's a recent update of me:

Getting all over excited about the voice conference with my friend on Saturday. I was totally surprised at the clarity of my friend's voice over the headphone. Even better than the phone's. The plus factor is that i can talk and be heard even when there's some distance away between the yellowing mic and my mouth. We can even share programs over the net without any delay and problems. It made our online project discussion far more pleasant even though we ended discussion at 5 a.m. sunday morning. (Btw, we used Microsoft Netmeeting.) Pardon us for getting keyed up over such a minor technology. We are a bunch of people who claim to to Computer Science undergraduates but with not much of techno savvy.

It's recess week!

Been itching to change my first layout. Getting sick of purple. So its Green weeks now! No particular preference. Just going for a change.I take away some of previous stuffs because I hardly update those stuff + I doubt people really see them. Because of time constraints, I keep my web simple. Just like that!

Haven't been sleeping for two days. I'm not joking. (I could still type! Amazing!) Been working on my Marketing paper for 3 days non-stop. Ask me anything about Tiger Beer and I will tell you though I never drink beer before. I reckon I'm not cut up to write anything but craps. Only after handing in my paper to Desmond, then I realise that I have left out the major aspect of "sex sells" *Damn*

Visited my grandma at NUH yesterday afternoon. She's really very sick now, lying there in pain. She doesn't seem to recognise us. But I caught her tilting her head up to have a glimpse. Everything changes so much and so fast. Heard from Doc that she has 2 to 3 months left. Feel so down.

Pimples popping all over my face. Now is just a breather for me. Going to work on projects like hell after today.

~

Same Old Valentine

It's late night. Been laughing out loud while browsing though Valentine folder in BBS. Some're so romantic, some're authentic, some're humourous, some're crude and crappy while the others'sad...a hodgepodge of anything you could think of. An update of my life: bad sleeping habit kicking in. Mild insomnia as a result. Been sleeping in late like 3am and waking up at 1pm. Probably because of too much schooless days.

Though now I am suppose to get the drawing of use case diagram done, but I feel I have to get this down first or else it'll just flew out of my mind. I have been involved in quite a few conversation with different people centred around BGR. Strange enough, these are not started by me. Erm....I think they're probably affected by 'disturbing' Valentine's scent. Which factor is more determinant in paving a way for starting love relationship Look or Personality? Some says 'look' while i say 'socialability'. My chio friends with endless supply of guys lining up offering themselves is an obvious evident.(True to some extent) while unluckly others have to sit on cold plate for dunno how long. I once had a deal with my best pal recently if that we are still single by 40, we're going to be nuns together. I think this is just a way of consoling each other. But you never know how true it could turn out to be. No bitter feeling. Accepted the fact. The world isn't going to rotate another way. I'm alway feel that look does come in initally (which is a sad thing sometimes) but it's the character made it to the very last.

I've been feeling weird especially these days. I realise I'm the only odd one among my buddies who does not have any special one in mind ever since I came into SOC. I don't feel like looking for one even. I do often see some of ex-crushes appearing anywhere in school compound but the feelings are no longer there. I've outgrown them.

By the way, I been getting busier and you notice that I do not update my blog frequently nor do I write much. So just wish all lovers an early enjoyable Valentine's Day.

~