Sea Change
The New Year brought some changes for our club. Due to renovations at the Brighton Hotel, our previous meeting venue became no longer available so we are meeting at The Volunteer Rescue Hall at Shorncliffe – at least for the time being. 

Meetings
Theme meetings are always fun and add extra interest. Our first meeting this year had an Australia Day theme with some Toastmasters dressing appropriately. It was just a coincidence, but the hotel (It was our last meeting there) provided an Australian atmosphere with a laughing kookaburra on the poker machines nearby.

At our Easter meeting, the Easter Bunny caused a stir by entering through the window. Kellie looked  hot in her bunny suit, but as she explained it’s the only time of the year she gets to wear it! 

Some Great Achievers. Congratulations to Kim who won the Area Novice Speech Competition at the Area Council meeting In February with her entertaining speech, “The Dating Game.” The meeting was hosted by our club. Congratulations also to Maurie, on winning third place in the Metropolitan Division International Speech Competition. The Metropolitan division Conference was held in March.at Gaythorne.  And congratulations to Kellie on obtaining her C.T.M. award recently.

Kim

Did you know? (A bit of trivia might help your next speech) 

It is impossible to lick your elbow. A crocodile can't stick it's tongue out. A shrimp's heart is in their head. People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you sneeze, your heart stops for a millisecond. 
In a study of 200,000 ostriches over a period of 80 years, no one reported a single case where an ostrich buried its head in the sand (or attempted to do so - apart from Bones). It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky. A pregnant goldfish is called a twit. 
More than 50% of the people in the world have never made or received a telephone call. Rats and horses can't vomit. The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be the toughest tongue twister in the English language. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die. If you keep your eyes open by force, they can pop out. 
Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over million descendants. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times. In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere. A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.
 23% of all photocopier faults worldwide are caused by people sitting on them and photocopying their posterior. In the course of an average lifetime you will, while sleeping, eat 70 assorted insects and 10 spiders. Most lipstick contains fish scales. Cat's urine glows under a black- light. Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different. Over 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow."

Officer Elections
New Club Officers will be elected on May 14.  Serving as a club officer is a great opportunity to learn new leadershio skills.  Here is a brief description of the roles… 

President - 
chairs meetings and supervises all other officers 

Vice President Education -
 schedules meeting assignments and works with members to see that their needs are met

Vice President Membership - 
helps prospective members to fill in the appropriate form, runs club membership drive and also works to keep members satisfied and happy 

 Vice President Public Relations - 
makes sure club meeting listings appear in the media, puts posters up, etc.

 Secretary -
sends correspondence on behalf of the club, keeps club records and minutes

 Treasurer - 
handles financial affairs, such as dues and purchases

 Sergeant of Arms -
takes care of club equipment, sets up meeting room, calls meeting to order, greets guests, etc. 
 

Another Bunny Joke
Did you get enough bunny jokes at our Easter meeting? Here’s another one….

A man is driving along a highway and sees a rabbit jump out across the middle of the road. He swerves 
to avoid hitting it, but unfortunately the rabbit jumps right in front of the car.

The driver, a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulls over and gets out to see what has become of the rabbit. Much to his dismay, the rabbit is dead and the driver feels so awful that he begins to cry.

A beautiful woman driving down the highway sees the man crying on the side of a road and pulls over. 
She steps out of the car and asks him what's wrong.

"I feel terrible," he explains, "I accidentally hit this rabbit and killed it."

The woman says, "Don't worry." She runs to her car and pulls out a spray can. She walks over to the 
limp, dead rabbit, bends down, and sprays the contents onto the rabbit. The rabbit jumps up, waves its paw at the two of them and hops off down the road.

Ten feet away the rabbit stops, turns around and waves again, he hops down the road another ten feet, 
turns and waves, hops another ten feet, turns and waves, and repeats this again and again and again, until he hops out of sight.

The man is astonished. He runs over to the woman and demands, "What is in that can? What did you 
spray on that rabbit?"

The woman turns the can around so the man can read the label.

It says, "Hair Spray - Restores life to dead hair, and adds permanent wave."

And finally…

There are only 3 kinds of people in the world...  those who can count and those who can't.

Snippets Archives

Home