Shaddyr's Eclectic Collection > Buffy Fanfiction > Shaddyr > Pixelated Promises 2
Pixelated Promises, Part 2
By Shaddyr & Mint WitchRating: PG - 13
Spoilers: Total speculation on S7
Author's Notes: This is an exercise in Style & Genre for us, so bear with us.
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Slayer1234: Ha! Gotcha!
JustOkay: Slayer. Um.. Hi.
Slayer1234: Like, yeah! How could you hang up on me?
Slayer1234: Waiting.
JustOkay: What? Hang up? I didn't think you had anything else you wanted to say to me
JustOkay: Sorry - I'm a bit.. Um.. Well, bloody hell!
Slayer1234: When has that ever stopped you b4?
Slayer1234: Pulleeze!
JustOkay: Buffy. I don't know how to make you believe me, but I have changed.
JustOkay: I'm willing to respect your wishes
JustOkay: Isn't that what you want?
Slayer1234: Demons don't change, Spike. Didn't you teach me that?
JustOkay: No, as a general rule that is certainly correct.
JustOkay: Sometimes though circumstances do.
Slayer1234: Then explain it to me. Cuz I really want to know.
JustOkay: Do you really? You say that, but your mind is about as open as Peaches' wallet. And trust me, after all the years I spent with the tightfisted bastard, I ought to know how tightly closed that is.
JustOkay: Damn it
Slayer1234: Not funny.
JustOkay: I wasn't going to do this!
Slayer1234: Just spill, Spike.
Slayer1234: *you know you want to. Tell me, Spike, what's so important that you it makes you all...
Slayer1234: stupid.
Slayer1234: pathetic. Cuz my Spike? He's not pathetic.
JustOkay: I decided that it was time that things changed, Buffy. So I went somewhere and made a change.
Slayer1234: Again with the hair color?
JustOkay: I was pathetic before. I just know it now.
JustOkay: What the hell do you want from me? Go away Spike! You're pathetic Spike! But you won't leave me alone!
JustOkay: I did it for you! And you'll never forgive me anyway, so why the hell did I even bother?
JustOkay: Oh damn.
Slayer1234: What do I want? What do I want?!
JustOkay: Obviously this hasn't fixed my ability to keep my soddin' mouth shut.
Slayer1234: I want Spike! I want sex on wheels, listens to me whine, bad ass vamp that takes no shit from anyone.
Slayer1234: Fuck you Spike!
JustOkay: What?
Slayer1234: Just, Fuck You!
Slayer1234: Okay!
JustOkay: You want what?
Slayer1234: You were my friend, my lover, my.
JustOkay: Buffy you don't, you really don't--
Slayer1234: Fuck! My friend! And I messed it all up and then you were GONE!
Slayer1234: Gone!
JustOkay: Your friend? You thought I was your friend?
Slayer1234: What was I supposed to do?
JustOkay: Oh, Buffy, I'm so sorry, I never meant to... it wasn't supposed to.. I wasn't leaving you! I had to... I had to make things right!
Slayer1234: Shit. Yes. Ok.
Slayer1234: I can't do this. I wasn't gonna do this.
JustOkay: I miss you, Buffy. I miss you so much. I fall asleep and I see you, I turn around cuz I keep hearing your voice in the crowd, I smell cinnamon and roses and I look for you...
JustOkay: The last thing I ever want to do is hurt you again.
Slayer1234: You never hurt me. Don't you get it?
JustOkay: I need a fag.
JustOkay: What? I fucking well tried to rape you! Hurt you? I nearly DESTROYED you!
Slayer1234: In that building, you asked if I was afraid you could...
JustOkay: Buffy, you were the only thing good and pure and wonderful and not evil in my whole unlife...
JustOkay: I'd swim in holy water, eat communion wafers, and walk into the sunlight before I'd ever hurt you again.
Slayer1234: You're not hearing me. You could, but you never did.
JustOkay: Afraid of what, luv?
Slayer1234: You never hurt me. Really.
JustOkay: Okay, confused here. (Oh, god, I'm talking like a soddin Scooby - stake me now!)
Slayer1234: Don't make me say this... oh, god.
JustOkay: You don't have to say anything, Buffy.
Slayer1234: Even then, in the bathroom.
Slayer1234: That was wrong, make no mistake, that was way wrong.
JustOkay: I know. Oh god, how I know.
Slayer1234: But you didn't hurt me.
Slayer1234: I was already hurt.
JustOkay: You were in bloody agony!
JustOkay: Huh?
Slayer1234: And I could have stopped you... um... earlier.
Slayer1234: You messed with me.
JustOkay: That's not the bleedin' POINT! You said I didn't listen - you're right! It's my biggest bloody shortcoming! You told me to get out and I came in. You said to stop and I didn't.
Slayer1234: I came back different, and everything was weird and...
Slayer1234: I said stop a lot.
JustOkay: And I should have listened.
Slayer1234: I'm sorry.
JustOkay:
JustOkay:
Slayer1234: No, you're not listening dammit!
Slayer1234: I told you stop and yes and don't stop and I'm not stupid!
Slayer1234: Fuck.
Slayer1234: Never mind, I thought we could maybe talk about this but it's weird and hard.
JustOkay: No, you're not stupid. You're a very smart girl. You know what you want. And what you don't want. Would you mind.. um... explaining it to me, cuz, I'm feelin' more than a little dense at the moment and I can't bear to think I have misunderstood what I think you're trying to tell me...
JustOkay: Yes, talk, I so want to talk to you Buffy, for hours and days and years.
Slayer1234: Yeah.
JustOkay: And I sound like a poofer, but it's true.
Slayer1234: Okay. Maybe. But.
JustOkay: But?
Slayer1234: This is hard, so I'm just gonna say it, okay? I did feel it when you were... in me.
Slayer1234: Oh god.
Slayer1234: I was so...
JustOkay: You have nothing to be ashamed of, Buffy. Please, don't be ashamed. And I promise - I know it's just a pixelated promise - but I promise not to hurt you with it.
Slayer1234: Wrong. I came back wrong. No, don't, I liked it, I needed to be wrong.
Slayer1234: I'm not her.
JustOkay: Why? Was it because of all those horrible things I sad?
Slayer1234: No!
JustOkay: Not her? Not who? You're YOU Buffy, the same Buffy you've always been.
Slayer1234: No, I'm not. I've never really been her.
JustOkay: Okay, I'm listening. Tell me.
Slayer1234: She's somebody different, I just...
Slayer1234: I didn't want to be Faith, all fucked up and crazy but I am but I'm not but I am not Xander's Buffy or Willow's Buffy or even yours...
Slayer1234: I don't know who I am.
Slayer1234: Why am I telling you this?!
Slayer1234 has logged off.