Beginnings
by Arian (arian_silver@yahoo.com)

Author’s note: There is one tinsy insy little imperfection in this fic, but I didn’t want to change it because it completely screwed everything up. So, just imagine that the little Squall in the end sequence of the game wasn’t looking for Ellone. Just make believe that Ellone was still in the orphanage. Work with me, people.

 

 Edea carefully lowered her shaking frame into a chair. It had happened again and once more she had been unable to prevent it. Thankfully, this time, no one had been around to witness the change that had come over her and no harm had been done.

  The woman rested her head in her hands, her long black hair cascading around her face. It had started a few days after she had inherited the powers of another sorceress, one from the future. On that day, a young man had appeared. She had guessed it was Squall, but not the young boy that she was familiar with; this was a Squall from a distant point in time. She shook her head, remembering the exchange. It was a conversation that should never have taken place. It was a mistake.

  When the other sorceress had appeared, Edea had felt sorry for her. She had been reduced to such a bedraggled state and Edea could only guess at what it must be like, to be in that state and yet have the sorceress power pulling you onwards, unable to rest until it left you. And so she had agreed to accept the power. What harm could it do? She had thought at the time. I’m already a sorceress.

  She had been a sorceress for as long as she could remember. It was hard for her to recall the first time she had received the power, because it hadn’t mattered. It had made little change to her life because the power had been so very weak. She had scarcely used any of the ability that was hers, but now… now she had infinitely more sorceress power at her disposal. Her slim form contained so much of this strange energy it felt like she was being squeezed out of herself… and she knew that at times that was exactly what was happening.

  It would have been alright if it had just been her new abilities she had to deal with, but there was much more than that. She was a vessel that stood out like a beacon to any other sorceress, and from a place she could only imagine she had caught the eye of a malignant sorceress. The same one whose powers she had inherited.

  It was possibly that the first time would have been the last. The sorceress from the future, Ultimecia, swamped her mind and held it for a few moments, merely out of curiosity. Edea had sensed that she was going to move onwards to Adel in Esthar, a sorceress who would willingly help her, but Ultimecia had seen something. Deep in Edea’s mind she had seen her own death, the moment of giving up her power and she had fled back to her own time. Since then, Edea had been possessed several times, always managing to hold it back or force her opponent away before any damage was done. The future sorceress wanted her now, not Adel. She wanted powers she was familiar with and she had seen a chance for more than just vengeance.

  Ultimecia had seen Ellone. She had gleaned the girls ability from Edea’s mind and immediately saw how useful, and essential, this could be.

  The weary Matron let out a long sigh. There was nothing she could do. It was getting too much to stop the possessions now. She couldn’t keep up the stamina to fight back, but she couldn’t just watch as one of her children was spirited away.

  The answer lay in what Squall had told her, when he had lost himself in Time and spoken to her in the orphanage garden. He had said he was a SeeD. And Garden trains SeeDs to kill the sorceress. Just one sorceress, though; he had never mentioned more than one. Who were they trained to kill? Adel? Or was the Esthar threat removed by then? Could it be they were trained to kill Ultimecia? Edea hoped that it was. She knew the other possibility and put it far from her mind.

  Her head lifted as Cid walked through the doorway. She smiled in greeting as he sat besides her. “Is something the matter?”

  “I… think so. I’m not sure.” Edea poured out the story of the possessions to her husband. He already knew about her encounter with Ultimecia and Squall, but she had managed to keep this new horror a secret.

  “We have to get Ellone away from here.” He told her immediately, holding her hands in his own. “We can’t let anything happen to that girl.”

  “I know. But… I think we should do more. I think that there’s more that can be done. We’re the only ones who know, Cid. It’s our duty to do as much as we can.”

  Cid’s expression was apprehensive as tears began to roll down the woman’s face. “I’m going to have to leave. I can’t stay here, not like this. What if something happens while she’s… What if the children…? I have to go away. I have to leave you all. It’s the safest way.”

  The man looked stricken suddenly, not expecting the answer. His eyes flickered frantically back and forth, seeking another answer. “There’s no other way, is there?” He sighed at last. “We don’t have another choice.”

  Edea choked back her sobs and he held her tight for a moment. “Shush.” He soothed gently. “It will be alright. I promise.”

  The dark haired woman wiped at her tears and looked seriously at him. “We have things we need to talk about, you and I. There are things that have to be done. Things that you have to do. Garden… You must build Garden and train cadets to fight the sorceress. They will be called SeeDs. SeeDs from a Garden…”

  “Just like Squall told you.” Cid surmised. “A military school. But… which sorceress, Edea? If it’s you… then I just can’t train them! I can’t raise them to do that.”

  “It’s not me. It’s her. The one from the future. But… if she’s possessing me, then it’s the same thing.”

  “I can’t do it, Edea.” He said honestly. “I can’t train people to kill you. How could I?”

  “You have to!” She implored. “It will turn out, in the end. This is the only way! You know that you must in the end! It’s already happened, after all! Squall said that it had. And we will win out. We already have the knowledge of that.”

  Cid turned his head away. “But we will be around to see it? More to the point, will you? Maybe we know that Ultimecia will not win, but what does that mean if you don’t survive this possession?”

  Edea swallowed hard and turned his face gently back towards her. “We have to believe that it will work out. We can’t argue about this, Cid. We don’t have a choice. Say you’ll do it. Promise me that you’ll do it.”

  “Okay.” He sighed finally. “I’ll find some way… I’ll build this Garden of yours.” He paused. “What about the children? Where will they go?”

  “Garden. They must. Squall said he was a SeeD, remember? If he goes, then they must all go. Except Ellone. We have to keep her safe.”

  “A boat.” The man said thoughtfully. “It’s perfect. It can move around whenever there’s the need to move location.”

  Edea shook her head fearfully. “Don’t tell me anymore. I can’t know this! She’ll find it in my mind and all this planning will be for nothing! She already knows about Garden, but we have to keep Ellone’s whereabouts a secret from her!”

  “Very well.” Cid nodded agreement. “But what about Squall? He’s so dependent on that girl… How will he take her leaving?”

  “He’ll never let her go… Sneak her out in the middle of the night when he’s sleeping. It will be the best way. Squall will have to learn to live without her. We all have sacrifices to make here, and that must be his.” Her face filled with pity. “Poor boy… It’s a shame that he has to understand loss so young…”

  They continued to talk late into the night, unaware of the listener at the door. Eventually, Quistis crept away to sleep.

 

***************

 

  The next few days were as normal as ever. Squall and Ellone played with Irvine and Selphie, Quistis sometimes joining in, but she seemed strangely distant from the others. Zell screamed frequently at Seifer to leave him alone, and Seifer laughed, driven on by the same cries that were intended to stop him.

  One afternoon, Squall, Seifer and Quistis were in the garden when Edea came towards them. Her bearing was different, with more authority than usual, and a severe expression clouded her features. The children instantly wondered what they had done wrong.

  “Where is Ellone?” She asked, her voice strangely fragmented. “Where is the girl?”

  “What did Sis do?” Squall asked curiously, protective of his sister and frightened by Matron’s unfamiliar behaviour.

  “Maggot!” The woman screeched, lifting him from his feet with a single gesture. “Where is that accursed girl?”

  Squall yelped and looked down at Edea, terrified. Quistis, who had overheard the conversation about the future sorceress, but only understood a little of it, faintly grasped what was happening. Ellone was in danger. “Don’t tell her, Squall! Don’t!” The small girl ran forwards, her blonde hair twisting behind her as grabbed at Edea’s hand and bit it as hard as she could.

  The sorceress screamed and lost her concentration, letting Squall thud to the ground.

  In a silence uncharacteristic for him, Seifer watched. He knew nothing of Ultimecia. All he saw was Quistis and Squall fighting his Matron. He ran to stand in front of the woman, glaring at the two children. “Leave her alone! She only wants to know where Ellone is!”

  “No, Seifer, that’s not Matron! You don’t understand!” Quistis yelled at him.

  Seifer shook his head in scorn. Quistis had always been bossy. Just because Squall was stupid enough to do everything the girl told him to, didn’t mean that he would as well. This was his Matron they had hurt and he’d never let them so much as touch her again.

  “Seifer?” Edea’s voice was suddenly weak and drained. “It’s alright. Everything will be fine now. Go and play with the others. All of you.”

  Cid appeared from inside the stone building as the children left warily, and he led her back inside. “Did it happen again?”

  “Yes!” She breathed in misery. “I couldn’t hold it back! It’s getting worse, Cid. I have to go. And soon. I nearly hurt the children. What if it gets beyond my control and something happens to one of them? Oh Hyne… And Seifer… He’s so confused by this. The others all take it in their stride, they forget it almost as soon as it happens, but him…” She shook her head. “Tomorrow. I’ll leave tomorrow. But tonight, you have to take Ellone away. It’s no longer safe for her here.”

  Cid closed his eyes in quiet despair while Edea cried softly in his arms. They both knew it would be years before they could see each other again.

 

***************

 

  Squall awoke suddenly, aware that something had changed. He looked around at the other tiny beds in the room. The others were sleeping. He glanced across to where Ellone slept and his eyes widened. She wasn’t there. A high pitched wail echoed through the building, waking everyone. “Sis!”

  Quistis guessed that Cid had finally taken Ellone away and crossed to Squall’s bed, trying to comfort him. “It’s alright. She’s just had to go away for a bit.”

  “Leave me alone! I want Sis! Where is she?! Sis, why did you leave me?” The boy cried out, unwilling to let go of the one person who had never left him. Rejected, Quistis shuffled sadly back to her bed, casting a glance back at the small boy. Well, if Ellone wasn’t here, she’d look after him. She’d look after him and never leave him.

 

***************

 

  Soon after that Edea left and the children found themselves lost without their beloved Matron. Cid spent a lot of time arranging something and soon they found themselves split up and placed in various locations, living in the new military schools that had arisen, seemingly out of nowhere. At the Garden Cid presided over, Squall, Seifer and Quistis were placed.

  Squall, still mourning the loss of Ellone, had turned into a silent, reticent boy. Cid kept a watchful eye on him, knowing that he was to be the one who would finally put an end to Ultimecia. The boy had talent, that was for sure, but he didn’t seem to be anything more than a robot, doing exactly as he was told, no more, no less. Still Cid persevered, watching Squall carefully, knowing that this young fighter was the key to getting his wife back.

  Quistis watched Squall too. Always she watched him, ready to catch him if he fell and trying to encourage him. She was always ignored. The influence of GF’s made her recall nothing of the conversation she had overheard. She only knew that Squall had been in her life for a long time and she was never going to leave him.

  Of them all, Seifer had suffered the most. Already thoroughly confused after the witnessed possession, he had then lost the person most dear to him. Edea had vanished, just as Ellone had, and something in him knew that she needed him. He had always been fiercely protective of her, but the GF’s had robbed him of those memories. Already a Sorceress’ Knight at such a young age, he searched constantly for something that seemed to be missing. Something he couldn’t remember, but he knew he would recognise it when he found it.

  It was to be years later before he discovered what it was. Struggling in the turmoil around him, he would find his way to Timber’s television studio and he would encounter his Matron again. Filling a hole that throbbed inside, he would be the sorceress’ knight again and a dream would be fulfilled.

  For Cid, the years had been empty and sorrowful. With nothing to look forward to but the prospect of his wife’s death at the hands of his trainees, the children they had raised together, he somehow kept going. When finally Galbadia announced Edea as the new ambassador, Cid could only laugh for sheer joy at seeing her again, even though the rest of the world trembled. Even though this meant that the nightmare was only just beginning.

 

Author’s note: Not quite how I expected this one to turn out… Still, here’s the usual request. Feedback is much appreciated.

Burnt Norton V by T.S Eliot.

…Love is most nearly itself

    When here and now cease to matter…

… In my end is my beginning.

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