I PASSED SEC2!
CHEERS 8)
That is all I am happy about, and I dont ask for more.
This will be my last post for oocities.com/shardsrce.
I'm creating a new blog.
Bye.
It has been nice.
I have been running around since this morning, and I feel very drained.
Well, today I went out with my cousin,auntie mum and brother to robinsons because he needed to buy a monkey suit for his grad night.
Women, can walk very fast when they are motivated.
Hokay, so then I went to speech training.
Everything was so messed up, and people were just; .. fed up.
So you get the idea.
I have overcharged my average kinetic body energy, and now I feel mentally and physically drained.
I am aesthetic, and I dont think I'll be able to curse, swear or jump around in joy when the Singapore Idol results come out later.
So now, we're doing a whole new script, again.
It's going to be about some magical pot, with gay baojingtians and sissy eunuchs. I think.
So our new script was demolished, and replaced with a new; new one.
Admist all the chaos and antics, Jasmin sent me a really mushy love sms, and it just made me cringe.
Anyway; I will be enthusiastic about it tomorrow, after a refreshing night's rest.
I was on the bus home, and the only vacant seat was the one facing the back of the bus, towards all the other passengers.
I realised that it is a very nice place to sit, cause you're kinda like moving backwards, and everything's going in the wrong direction?
And I thought about stuff. Like acceptance; and how the world doesnt really give much of a shit whether or not you're satisfied, but either way you still have to come to terms with it.
Well, no one seemed to want to sit with me; so I tried smiling pleasantly and the worried-looking old indian man standing infront. But he only gripped the railing harder, so I dropped it and let my face settle into the grouchy, -touchmeandI'llbite- look.
After a while it started getting crowded, and I became rather self conscious cause people were like staring at me, as if they expected a nanyang girl to give up her seat to others. But then I couldnt see any old / pregnant / disabled people around.
So I just got off at the macpherson park hoping to walk through some sort of shortcut through the jungle-park area to Xianyun's house bustop. But there wasn't any, so I ended up making a detour all the way to 10m away from the bustop that I alighted at, and on to the sidewalk. Which is stupid.
Then I decided to take bus 40; cause I was certain that 135 would get really clogged up after passing paya lebar mrt. However; 40 started making huge detours and ended up at Aljuned mrt.
So hokay, there was this man behind me talking on his handphone; to his friend about their gathering at parkway parade, then I realised that the guy on the neighbouring seat was also discussing about his meeting on his handphone.
I wondered bemusedly if they might be talking to each other; through their handphones. But thats just really stupid and lame.
Sigh, I am losing it.
I am strained, and exhausted after saving my dog from drowning in the pond.
Singapore Idol is on now. I pray.
[[add]
Hi. I'm back here again.
Cause I am bored, and I feel like talking, but no ones wants to hear me blab on and on, thus; I am here.
Xuen is sad, dont be dear. It's okay, hokay?
If you need anything, call ok?
Just now when I was walking down the bus, I walked pass a sign, that said "please tap near bus stop". Sigh.
Jerry is out, though he sucks; I pity the poor bloke. And i think i know what he meant when he said that his family was affected by the public's criticism.
A`int his fault.
I need to get a life.
Hold her hand, it seems to disappear.
I wouldn't mind sleeping, but then I'm pretty sure its too early and i'll start getting night sweats when the blanket gets too warm and my bed starts feeling really stuffy, I usually end up throwing my bear at the aircon.
I need to be refreshed. I am irritated.
She falls apart by herself, No one's there to talk or understand.
Feels the sting, dries her eyes; finds herself opens the door and sighs.
People see right through you, Everyone who knew you well.
Falls apart, might as well, day is long and nothing is wasted
Runaway, runaway; Wanna hold on to you but you're going away
Runaway, runaway, Wanna hold you tomorrow but you're leaving today
You walk along by yourself, there's no sound nothing's changing.
They've gone away left you there, emptiness is nothing you can share.
All those words that hurt you,
More than you will let it show
Comes apart by yourself, all is well and everything's wasted.
Sometimes I feel around;
It scares me some I can't be down
All this time to be on my own, in is out to be again. This time will waste another friend, I know where they will know. ..
Where they'll runaway
She's falls apart no one there.
Hold her hand it seems to disappear
Falls apart might as well;
Day is long and nothing is wasted.
Such an angsty song.
Ho.
Went for the script meeting today. 10 people out of 18 came. Which is not exactly that bad I suppose.
Anyway, we finished it, the script and all. I am pleased.
Hokay so we came up with the draft in KAP and pissed the smokers on the neighbouring table off. Then we went back to the hostel and got started on stuff.
Woohoo we played The Call on Jiayin's playlist and me and Jing got so high and stuff. Yea~
I dont know how they do it, but the Backstreet Boys just get me high!
W00tZeh~~
Was dancing around and singing for a good ten minutes.
I cant imagine; of all the people the Backstreet Boys had to be the ones that got me out of my blues; temporarily, but still.
Hur! Let me tell you about the call that changed my destiny ~
Anyway, I am proud of our new script, and I hope we'll all work hard and pull it off great.
SHIT LARH.
I dont like worrying, when no one else seems to give a shit.
I was watching TRL just now, you know america's most popular countdown show on mtv.
Kay, and like, these days all the songs sound the same. Especially the blacks. Not trying to be racist or anything but what the hell is with all the " hey man im such a gangster comma you all wanna screw me right then after we go gambling and take drugs~ and then i describe what happens during the sexual activity". For god's sake its all the bloody same thing.
Shit 80% of the blacks are conforming into this stupid stereo type of black gangs and like, its so stupid.
Frigging tv is irritating me.
Oh oh oh, and then for the girls its the "woots im sucha hot babe man look at me shake my ass and wont you just look at my cleavage!"
What the hell larh. Why do almost all the black women that make it on tv have to shake their ass and show off their cleavage?
Dont be offended, but maybe I just dont get their music.
Or maybe its the lyrics.
"My goodies, check out my goodies!"
Doesnt that just mean that you're looking for someone to screw? Hokay.
"Hurhur people check out my boobs man their so frigging BIG all the guys are coming to the yard to check em out!! woot~ yea girls i can teach you how to shake em but I do have to charge; sorry sia. Its the working world babeh!"
I'm still in a bad mood. Please please dont let tomorrow end with no results.
_______________________________________
I detect a routine in my holidays already.
Breakfast. Computer/Tv. Lunch. Sleep. Computer. Tv. Sleep.
See right now I dont even really feel bored.
Only when I go online and realise there's nothing to do, then I start informing people on msn that I am bored.
Hur. Even my playlist is getting boring.
Sigh, where's the life.
I have got to get out of this house, but then I dont think the outside world is very welcoming.
Theres a script meeting tomorrow, but apparently no one know's what time its at.
I am tired. I dont want another shouting and trying to get your views heard or straining to hear other's views kinda thing which will result in people getting emotional and pissed.
May I remind you, that those who dont turn up tomorrow will go along with the final script, whether to like it or not; hokay?
I hope I laugh tomorrow.
__________________________________________
Sigh Sigh.
I feel so heavy. Not as in weight wise no.. well actually, yes; but not now; its not that heavy heavy..
Abit claustrophobic like the whole world is getting too crammed and noisy.
I'm irriated. And my neck feels too strained too.. Its so tight and stiff like its going to close in on my throat and suffocate me.
Shit I cant shake of this feeling.
Went training at yck today.. well only ended up me with me and Jing cause nobody seems to be free anymore.
I wasn't even in the mood to train and my strokes frickin sucked.
We vandalised the toilet and even that didnt really lift my mood.
Me and Jing discussed the script and came up with something.
It's not that bad, but I'm not sure if people are willing to work hard for it.
Well, meeting tomorrow people.. Please try to make it. But if you're going to come and start whining then, why dont you just stay home yah..
H0ho, Shanti's such a whiny brat I hope she doesnt move her fat ass out of the house.
What the hell someone refresh me with a bucket of ice water.
HUR.
I'm in a bad mood.
Sigh. If you cant find the scrollbar, just ask me. I dont think I mean to call you a toot.
And dont worry Jiayin, it's not cause of the choral night thing.
Yah larh I know this layout sucks larh can.
Arh SCREW.
The exams arent even over yet and I'm already in the holiday mood.
I was bored this weekend as I spent the last 40 hours lazing around and ranting of boredom to no one.
Bliss bliss.
I'm glad its finally going to be over.
I hope I dont anyhow rush through the paper tomorrow in anticiaption of the final end of the EOYs.
But then again Im going to have to retake science, if they decide not to just flunk me and get it over with.
But thats a different story.
Yea you get meh high!
[ // at 9:13 Pm ]
Tomorrow's the maths paper 2.
I think I'm going to start a countdown, of the events and the days left of two `0 eight.
Even if I get retained, or the next half of my secondary school life turns out like shit; I'm glad that these two years have been so wonderful.
So many things to laugh at, and reminisce.
And I'm sure that during our class gatherings, everybody will try their best to make it right?
Well I will.
But I hope EVERYONE will come too. If not it just wont be the same.
Ha. And it would be nice if James came, keongx, chow hoon etc. and how could anyone forget chay?
Hoh. Although I dont think people really want to meet her again, but well.
Thanks eighters, for all these great memories.
I'll make it last my lifetime.
SHIT.
I dont understand why. after all this while. jerry and chirssypoo are still in the running.
SCREW LAH.
I'm ashamed.
Is singapore really that pathetic?
Oh for the love of our country, please people; vote for TALENT.
If Jerry ong ends up representing singapore in world idol.
I will die of shame.
And then I hope all you votersthatwastedyour50centsonjerrywhosemolesingsforhim will be glad.
You know you're really just defeating the purpose of this show.
SUCKERsSUCKERsSUCKERs.
Sigh. But I do pity Jerry 0ng.
I bet he gets dissed wherever he goes. And its not really his fault that brainless tootheads choose to vote for him.
I mean you cant expect him to go " Hey people dont vote for me I SUCK! "
Cause you see, stuff like that are SO OBVIOUS it doesnt need mentioning.
But when our surroundings are filled with brainless tootheads.
I have to say it.
PEOPLE WHY THE HELL ARE YOU VOTING FOR JERRY 0NG HE SUCKS.
0utrageous.
[ /add]]
Shit.
My tags inspire me.
If my dreams would kindly raise their hand and stand up, I'd follow them.
Cause whenever I step outside, somebody claims to see the light; it seems to me that all of us have lost our patience ..
And when everyone thinks they're right, nobody thinks that there just might be more than one road to our final destination,
But I'm not ever going to know if I'm right or wrong ; 'cause we're all going in the same direction.
And I'm not sure which way to go; because all along .. we've been going in the same direction.
I'm tired of playing games, of looking for someone else to blame;
For all the holes in answers that are clearly showing,
For something to fill the space;
Was all of the time I spent a waste ?.
'cause so many choices point the same way I was going.....
So why does there only have to be one correct philosophy?
I don't want to go and follow you just to end up like one of them .
And why are you always telling me what you want me to believe?
I'd like to think that I can go my own way and meet you in the end.
But I'm never going to know, whether I'm right or wrong; cause we've all been going in the same direction .
Shit.
I'm not in the mood to even try to articulate my feelings.
So there you go!
HO0bAStANk //
Science.
But I will stop here; because everyone is talking about the exams, and I shall be anti-climax and go on and on about whatever that's coming over meh!
Third Eye BlinD!!
The Sky was gold!
I'm packed and I'm holding I'm smiling, she's living, she's golden !
she lives for me !
She says she lives for me
Ovation ,.
She's got her own motivation ,
she comes round and she goes down on me ..
And I make her smile ,
It's like a drug for you ;
Do ever what you want to do ,
Coming over you ,,
Keep on smiling, what we go through ;
One stop to the rhythm that divides you ..
And I speak to you like the chorus to the verse !
Chop another line like a coda with a curse !
I want something else ; to get me through this,
Semi-charmed kinda life baby, baby.
I want something else ;
I'm not listening when you say ,
good-bye ..
I believe in the sand beneath my toes , The beach gives a feeling ; An earthy feeling .
I believe in the faith that grows ;
And the four right chords can make me cry ,
When I'm with you I feel like I could die ;
And that would be all right ..
All right.
Feel myself with a head made of the ground ; I'm scared but I'm not coming down, no no..
And I won't run for my life ;
She's got her jaws just locked now in smile .
but nothing is all right .
All right ..
[[ Semi-Charmed. ]]
HAHAHA. Just playing with my ego.
Bear with me. 8)
LALALA. Dont look at me; it said it!
HOKAY. Thats so sweet. 8)
I SCREAM FRAUD! gAah
ITS NOT MY FAULT. sigh.
Guilty by association. I swear I got it from Xuen.
I mean I practically sat with her for like 1 3/4 years? Poof.
XUEN how could you. 8(
HUR 8)
Aww.. Are we back here again? 8D
HA. Just playing.
SIGH. This thing is such a dud. 0h well. 8)
Ha. That was fun.
Okay. I have a really really bad feeling in the pit of my stomach.
Something is there and its just bursting to happen.
I dont know why, but I'm having this paranoia mild/seizure that something really bad is going to happen and I hope im really paranoid and nothing is going to happen cause seriously, this feels bad.
I'm not exaggerating, and being melodramatic, or pretending to be some prophet sheit;
But I have a really bad feeling in my bones.
I hope nothing is going to happen and all you readers can go jeer at me and call me a freak/poser;
But I'm scared.
And I dont think its the exam nerves.
WHootzeh.
Three days down. Four to go.
Everything is passing by really fast and before you know it the exams will be over.
Then we'll be sitting in the auditorium collecting our results and I'll be praying the same old prayer that I used last year and will probarly use for the rest of my schooling years:
To the 0ne above, whoever you are, if you let me pass this year, I will work harder next year, promise. Please? And I'll be a good girl.
Hoo hoo.
I hope it works seriously.
Pathetic can.
Anyway, I'm supposed to call my tution teacher when I get home.
Should I just wait for her to call me?
LaLa, I'm tired, WHERE'S MY LUNCH?
The malay man infront of me reading the utusan melayu kept me smiling throughout the 45 mins bus journey.
HUR.
Sigh. where's my lunch larh.
FoodFoodFood I need to food to study.
Teh Art of L0singh.
Just now while I was sheafing through the piles of stuff on my desk my maths practices [[ownself practices]] caught fire. I thought of removing it, but then they seemed contented just burning there so I let the fire take the remaining evidence of my hard work.
But I hope it shows in my results.
And then the wax overflowed and stuck the candle holder to the plate that I was using as a coaster.
Last night, I dreamt about a land inhabited by dragons and socerers.
And as the wind blew I watched the aumtumn leaves fall.
On a lighter note, I'm glad paper1 is over and now I just have to get through science and paper2.
[[add]
HHha.
I laughed while going through mag khoo's ivle history ppt notes.
8)
OH boy.
[/add]]
Hold on little girl
show me what hes done to you
stand up little girl
a broken heart cant be that bad
when its through its through
fate will twist up both of you
so come on baby come on over
let me be the one to show you
Im the one who wants to be with you
deep inside I hope you feel it too
waited on a line of wings and blues
just to be the next to be with you
Build up your confidence
so you can be on top for once
wake up
who cares about little boys that talk too much
Iv seen it all go down
your game of love was all rained out
so come on baby come on over
let me be the one to hold you
why be alone
when we can be together baby
you can make my life worth while
I can make you start to smile
when its through its through
fate will twist up both of you
so come on baby come on over
let me be the one to show you
Im the one who wants to be with you
deep inside I hope you feel it too
waited on a line of wings and blues
just to be the next to be with you
Mr big - Be with you //
Sigh. You know you love this song. 8)
For those who don't recognise it, its the song in the olympus ad that keeps popping up during Singapore Idol's commercial breaks.
Admist all your personal conflicts and backstabbing.
I hope we manage to just forgive and forget, and end our last year [[last 3 months]] together well.
I mean it.
Next year, wherever we end up, I'm sure we'll all look back in regret if this year ends up in friendship shambles and breakups.
Deep down you know you'll still treasure that friendship, even if you're not on speaking terms with that person right now, you'll still treasure it, dont you?
Somewhere along the line of these two years, you had fun with her, laughed with her, perhaps cried together?
Dont end everything on a sour note just because of that momentary spite.
I bet you have thought or said "I love you" to that someone before.
What happened?
Is it really worth such a big reaction?
Sigh Sigh.
Think carefully before you make a decision.
You don't want to regret do you;
[[add]
I'm so touched I want to cry.
[/add]]
I discovered something today.
If you play rock music really loudly on your wmp your parents wont be so eager to pass by and stare at what the hell you'r doing.
[[ GreenDay ] ]
The more I think about my english paper the more screwed it becomes.
Kai if you get retained, dont worry, I'll be there with you.
English paper today. I dont think I did very well, but I'm glad its over.
Don't cry Jiayin. It's ok. yeah. You can enjoy the softness of tissue and my and jing's sweet tunes of F4 songs. yea.
I hope I dont screw up on monday. Maths and Chinese paper one.
Went to xuen's house ans slacked around when maths was cancelled.
We destressed and played with her two totally freyed string guitars.
As we sit and contemplate the meaning behind the three words..
Xiao Bai Cai.
why are longkangs.. long..?
why do china people -chinese- speak chinese??
why the same name?
As I stare at my tofu, I question the reason of its existence..
But it didnt answer me.. I guess it doesnt know the answer.. too..
I just accomplished nearly two hours of algebra.
I am so so drained; but I'm proud of my will to resist going down for a break every 5 minutes.
I got so pressurized today.
There's a sinking feeling of doom in the pit of my stomach that I'm going to fail sec2.
And then I realised that if I fail chinese; I dont think lixiaohui is going to recommend my promotion.
And Im not sure twong and pihtai will either.
Seriously; Nanyang teachers are so petty.
For pete's sake its just a freaking SPONGE.
Why all the big hubbub?
Ok.
English Exam tomorrow.
Wish everyone the best of luck.
Its really comforting to know that James believes that we will all pass the exam.
8) Liang-ping-GoRz rocks my socks.
From now till 11 days later; I shall concentrate on passing Sec2, and everything else will be put on hold.
For these 11 days.
Thank you XuEn. If not for you; I would have dropped out of nanyang long ago.
Stressstressstress
Shit i accidentally deleted september twenty-nineth's entry.
But i remember hating those scripted words,
and believing that we will do really well for choral night; whatever script we do.
And not believing the 'hard work is the key to success'. Ok.
I forgot the rest.
September the Twenty-Eighth
New Layout. Its really simple.
Simplicity is good.
Considering all the lying and deceit going on everyday.
It would be a nice change to have it all out in the open, no hidden lies; secrey; backstabbing.
It would be nice.
Freaking out about choral night results.
Pray People!!
You know I suppose religion is comforting.
Its like when you believe in some religious teachings like karma, we all have a calling in life, fate, heaven and hell, etcetc; it makes alot of things much simpler.
But I wonder how people can have so much faith in something they've never actually witnessed?
I mean for all you know it could just be a bunch of made-up stories.
But it would really comes in handy sometimes?
If you believe that someone up there is watching over you, and that like; bad people will get their just deserts so you dont bother wasting time trying to get revenge, and of course it provides a source of hope.
Very intersting.
I wonder how people can believe in something so strongly that it just makes them stronger and believe in themselves and life so much more.
Not forgetting motivation and self improvement.
And all the good teachings really rub off them?
And if you were wondering; no, I'm not religous.
But I suppose there is someone up there.
Uh.. New layout.
Back to oocities.com/shardsrce.
GO!
Do you have the time; to listen to me whine?
Ok. Choral night results out tomorrow.
Feeling even more stressed out and panicky.
One of these days my heart will fail me.
Stayed back for science lesson today.
Was a whole waste of time.
Spent 2 hours listening to her talk about her mum who was waiting outside for her. 8)
HOKAY!
If all goes well and I get inspired and make a new layout by tonight.
Do you?
I did'nt think so.
September the Twenty-Seventh
Okay.
JASMIN WE NEED TO TALK.
I am confused.
Yeo Pih Tai has a remarkable ability to stress me out, and pressurize me to do my work. Amazing.
I dont know how she does it.
Xue En is getting stressed out too. Chill chuangster.
Math lessons are really freaking me out?
Most of the time; when I get stressed; I just minor panic seizures?
But I'm sure I'll be fine once the exams are over and I know that I passed Sec2.
Jie; if you have been snooping around my stuff and found my blog URL:
Good Luck in Bristol!
I'll miss you!
You know I find it much harder expressing feelings to my family than to my friends.
Well.
Its 2:47am now.
I couldnt sleep.
And its sad cause my therapy has been reduced due to the fact that I'm trying not the gain more excess weight during and after the exam period cause there's like no training for the whole of october?
Oh well.
Just now I went to The Next Wave NUS dance essemble 2004 to watch my sister perform.
I felt proud seeing her on stage.
Which reminds me of choral night.
But anyway, its nice seeing singapore's local young talent perform and they are really good.
Yay there's hope for the Arts.
Right now I really cant wait to finish secondary school.
Or just for the exams to be over would be great.
I hate being forced to study.
Okay, my mood swings have wrecked my concentration prowess and now I cant think.
But fear not; my therapist is sitting infront of me and its working wonders.
It had a really great sphere-like figure and a smooth green complexion ; but then I impaled it with a fork and now its drooping and getting its glass-bowl chair all wet and slippery.
I spent the morning planning my work schedule, but my swing from extreme oppression to a sudden sprout of enthusiasm in science which ended in half an hour left me letharigc lying on my bed in the dying heat without the aircon on for the rest of the morning.
I just couldnt reach the remote.
I started on the maths paper two but then my cold came back again on full force.
I couldnt eat lunch cause everything tasted bitter and I used finish a box of tissues and consumed two extra-strength clarinese tablets with little effect.
Oh man I'm so wilting.
I need my therapy.
Right now Green Tea icecream is the only thing left in this world with sweetness.
My playlist of angsty rock songs are helping.
It's times like these that I really dont know what I'm doing.
I can guarrentee that 80% of what I have learned in Science and Math lessons this year will not come in handy in my future occupation/s.
So what the hell am I doing here.
How do you expect me to be motivated when I know that all these wont be of use?
I am wasting my time and energy. All just to get through Nanyang.
No; I shouldnt have come to Nanyang.
Most people are nice and all; but I am so learning the wrong things.
Like why are we studying things that we are not interested in?
Learning is supposed to be enjoyable.
Not being stuck in boredomsville.
As I said; Green Tea icecream is the only thing that's worth waking up for now.
My mother saw me lying lifelessly on the couch with my science notebook on the floor.
She asked me if I was tired from studying too much.
I am tired of trying to study.
Tired of waiting for motivation to pay a visit.
After this half hour of therapy, I will go back to trying again.
I am so not cut out for this.
SOME PEOPLE OUGHT TO BE SCREWED WITH A SKEWER.
But whatever.
I dont need to accept your opinions.
I thank TheOneAbove for blessing me with friends; people who I know wont betray me.
Wake up suckers; wake up.
Oh and if you dont like my blog, you can just fuck off really.
No one's asking you to read it.
Okay, today we had the council elections.
Well; me jasmin and jing spent our time thinking of stupid questions for the QNS section.
Examples, Cough.
- Would you buy an indian bao from a starving indian man?
- I know that you know that I know that you know that I know that you know that I know you. Beware, I know what you did last deepavali. Love, Muthu.
- Ni ke yi bang wo zao wo de lao gong mah?
- What did sushi A say to Sushi B? Ans: Wasabi
- If you were stranded on a deserted island and you could only bring one of the following, what would it be?
A) a rickshaw B) a rubber duck C) pidan chiok. Explain.
I cant really think of the rest now but there were alot more.
Will add on.
Kay; then during recess went to the sewing room to try to do something with our pillow covers.
Yea but I think we just messed the place up.
Ee meng and Melissa were playing with the sewing machine pedal and like; the thread kinda slipped down some hole thingy?
I'm really not sure.
There was some popcorn thing, yea well wandered around with Jing and Gary busted us for the sponge business. Shit.
Hung a broom out of the 2nd level of the hall's railings.
Oh and theres a mop sticking out of the top of our classroom door. XD
Funkeh.
Oh and I think i forgot to mention the length of our class line today.
Kay it was so damn pathetic; like the unmistakeably shortest one out of the whole 3 levels?
Nearly half the length of the GEP classes. KAY.
We didnt really spring clean, we swept the floor but atleast we did our duty.
And when smiles are fake and actions are pretencious the only one that you can trust is yourself.
Save the few decent souls.
I sprained my toe. It's hurting` man, where's my wheelchair.
I hate graphs. Screw algebra.
I cant log on to MSN.
Choral night auditions tomorrow, I hope we all do well.
Please people; I beg you to memorise those few lines, its nothing compared to those of the main characters.
Is it so much to ask. Really.
Okay, now I'm all nervous cause if I screw something up tomorrow, I'll have to take back my words and end up eating the keyboard.
Kay; Anna has a piano exam tomorrow and her two roles for chinese and english are kind of screwed.
Wish Two`Eighters best of luck.
For the past ten-odd minutes I've been staring at this page as [Simple Plan- Welcome to my life] plays over and over in WMP.
My small chunk of oreo cheesecake is frozen.
As in literally; cause it's as hard as a rock and I cant taste the oreo, or the cheese.
Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?
Like somehow you just don't belong
And no one understands you
Do you ever wanna runaway?
Do you lock yourself in your room?
With the radio on turned up so loud
So no one hears you screaming.
I wish I could lock my door; but theres a sliding door connected to my sister's room which is shared by 3 people on the right side, and I dont have the key.
I wish I could turn the radio up so loud; but my walls are rather hollow, and while my brother's studying for his prelim, my sister is reading aloud from her P6 science encyclopedia.
To be kicked when you're down
I dont think people meant to kick me when I'm down, cause most of the time they cant really tell.
To be on the edge of breaking down;
But no one's there to save you.
I dont share much.
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desperate to find something more?
I dont like being lonely,
Most of the time I just dont know who to call.
No you don't know what it's like;
When nothing feels all right,
You don't know what it's like;
To be like me.
But I'm sure everyone has felt like that some point in time.
Okay, its hard trying to type out a long entry when you're sharing the computer with 4 other people.
I have to jump again,
even though I still have alot more to say.
Toodles.
Phew. A whole array of emotions today.
Well; there was this about me getting pissed with someone for being pissed with me getting pissed with her.
Then the pissified person got pissed and well..
Then there was this bit where Xuen tried to get me to stop cursing but I ended up ripping up the face of the girl on the front cover of the free newspaper thing.
I got over it in a surprisingly short time, and lamed around with Jasmin.
Went to the science lab and kouped some fire starters. I have sinned.
I'm supposed to feel guilty? okay.
Then I got really high during the celebration I think I spent half the time screaming. Whew.
Yeah, lets talk about zhong qiu jie.
I swear this festival will not be the same next year.
It'll pby be lame and boring and no one will come.
Maybe we could have our class gathering every mid-autumn's festival.
=D
Kay; first I was the lookout on the swing for predators coming to attack my tribe; but well they got pass the security gaurds so what do you expect me to do?
Anyway; we settled down and kouped ALOT of drinks.
Narh just brought back two plastic bags full of packet drinks can.
Took lots of photos. Yay.
Erh; walked around looking for things to do;
Disturbed people;
Niao-ed them;
Got bitchy;
Swept the floor;
Got into trouble;
Kay poh-ed around;
Walked around with sticks and dustpans;
Ran round like mad god I am so exhausted.
Did something unintentionally mean;
Gossiped, still am actually;
Fooled around;
Did lame things;
Tried stalking people;
Were unfriendly to mata-sir;
Hid the loot from ah-Sir;
Made the photographer pissed;
Put four candles on a pathetic piece of mooncake and didnt finish it in the end.
Broke two candles while sweeping the floor; [Bad Omen.]
Played with fire;
Wrecked the cleaners closet;
Went around chanting "Kill the pig, bash her in"
Lets just just settle for us being stupid and lame and having lost of fun.
Last year was kinda more exciting, but this year rocked too.
I realise that I always think about how I'm going to blog about my day on the bus home but it never turns out the same.
Aw man I love my class.
Just watched singapore idol.
GO SLYVESTER.
I dont like it when people lie.
And are insensitive.
Call me a freak, petty, brat whatever.
But I hate it when people lie to me.
And take me for a fool; pasty.
It brings back bad memories.
Yes I know I'm stupid larh ok.
But dont flaunt it in my face please.
See the root of the cause; of why people get hurt?
I think its all because of the insensitivity of others.
When you dont really give a shit about them.
You diss them, bitch about 'em.
Apologies arent excatly neccessary you know.
Really.
And it really really sucks when people give insincere apologies.
I HATE IT.
When people are insensitive;
Feelings get hurt.
Words cut deep.
Misunderstandings occur.
Ego deflation.
And overall we just feel bad; dont we.
And when you ask why the world if so fucked up.
Perhaps its because people are insensitive.
They dont think about the after effects of their actions and words.
They dont give a shit about the feelings of others.
You're all that matters to you.
Maybe you should think about how you're treating the people around you once in a while.
It might not seem much to you; but maybe it does to them.
And thats what it all boils down to isnt it.
Feelings.
Squash was rather pathetic.
We reach singapore poly at 4 and me,jasmin,jing and xian spent half an hour lying on the squash court floor pretending to be poisoned by water.
We were tired see.
James is a nice guy. Really.
He's nice.
Bwaha on the way home we were making up stories about ny teachers in movies etc.
Titanic: Jack is Tsai, Rose is damien.
LOTR: James is gandalf, Tsai is frodo, Damien is solomon [?]
Harry potter: Harry is yick, Jenny is the whomping willow, Hermione is pih tai, Ron is meng nan, Quirrel is Alex teo, Voldemort is Tsai.
Peter pan: James is tinkerbell, Peter Pan is uh.. peter, Hook is Alex.
Cinderella: Fairy godmother is Alex teo, Cinderalla is Damien, prince is Nelson Tum. [I nelson you say tum ; c-r Jing]
BWAHAHA
Wu ShenQiang-ge rocks my socks and boxs my boxers.
I'm sorry I screamed at Xuen & ppl in class just now.
Sorry larh.
When people menopause; I get affected too.
IM SORRY.
15 more days to EOYs.
Tomorrow, there will be two weeks left.
I think I'll print out the science notes today.
I refuse to spend another year in Sec2.
IM PASSING SEC2.
Yea.
I'm sorry, I have a feeling that people will still hold it against me.
You know sometimes it doesnt matter how much you improve, once you slip others will still freak.
Sorry to those that will give me space and time to mature and calm my temper.
Thank you Ron thok for your granola bars.
Today was fun.
HAHA we went to kfc after training.
And we molested colonel harlend sanders XD mm... nice cleavage.
BWAHA.
Me and Jing um.. rearranged him XD
Shall post the pics up when cheryl sends em.
Oh man.
Yujing BUEY HIAO BAI lah.
ITS the PLATE please.
Kay, nevermind.
Shall be nice and not ruin her moment of glory.
School was fun too.
Me jing and lixuan got into trouble cos we went to eat when sc practical ended early..
Like; well..
NOT OUR FAULT.
The potato pressure cooker seduced me.
YARH LORH.
yay the [script] for <[The Adventures of AngstyBoiBoi and his fwens]> is kinda completed.
Will be hosted on the class site, I think?
Either way; its gonna rock manz.
And yah; jing i just thought of another thing.
We can use pocky sticks as cigars!
Whoo can..
XD
Last episode of Friends today.
Drown in my sorrows larh.
Wah Biang seh;
I seem to be using alot of slangs lately.
Ethnic culture lorhz.
New layout.
Lyrics from the songs I love.
Yep.
This one took a while..
[[added `
The week slapped me on the cheek and left without a goodbye.
Was that a chinese-translated idiom?
I'm confused.
The dratted mp3 player has be buffled.
It goes on and off and it auto-deletes whenever I press enter.
I'm so suffering.
I mean so far I've had 5+ failed attempts and the most number of songs I've successfully recorded is uh.. three.
But I have no choice but to manage like this ever since my first-ever walkman broke down.
It's Lime-Green in colour.
And I personalised it myself.
I'm boring you. Sorry.
End-of-holiday blues have got me Down dOwn doWn dowN...
Sigh.. Reminds me of the time I was on the bus sighing and my friend told me that sighs create wrinkles.
SIGH.
Rambles on...
Sooner or later I'll get to the road where I know what I'm talking about..
But for now you can hang around if you're bored and you still want to hear me ramble..
Cause from now till there [[points at the bottom of scrollbar]] ; I'll be rambling my way down.
Teenage Angst.
Who says adults dont get angsty?
Ooh I'm on the 7th track now!
But theres only something wrong with the 5th one... I think.
Why do people get depressed over no reason?
I mean there has to be something right..
Even if its just the lack of interest in life. Thats still something.
I'm rambling. But its my blog; and if you dont like it, then SHOO.
Go away and disturb someone else.
I'm sorry if my words are harsh.
I didnt realise how harsh words can seem until harsh words were accidentally thrown at me today.
Even though I think its unintentional, but well...
Ouch it was harsh.
I like typing.
I think the clicking sound of the keys clacking on the board is soothing.
Which reminds me..
I havent done my book review yet..
I wanted to do it.
See theres a difference in wanting to do the work, or being forced to do it.
I dont want to do the maths paper, I may have to do it sooner or later;
But when you're doing something that you want to do,
The time just seems much more well-spent.
And meaningful.
Like my aunt always says; " If you want to do something do it well; if not, dont do it. "
She's so right.
I wonder why my whole family is angsty?
Is it in out genes to be filled with angst etc.?
HaHa. Genetic information DNA molecules: ANGST cells.
BWaHaHa.. I amuse myself. XD
No wait I think I got the science shit all wrong?
Oh dear I think im all confused again.
The weariness of age has suddenly overwhelmed me.
I was talking about death with my sister just now..
How we cried when our pets died.
Its rather freaky when you're discussing stuff like that with a over-emotional twelve year old who cries in almost every small arguement.
As I said; DNA angst shit.
Ah damn, I just screwed up the 13th track.
SHEIT larh.
Im not sure if I want the find my niche in life soon.
See if I do; then I'd know where I was going,
But theres nothing wrong with walking round and round..
As said, Im just rambling..
Sigh, long entry..
Should I go back, I feel alone and tired..
HAHA I GOT THAT OFF THE SONG I WAS LISTENING TO.
I'm not afraid to let it out.. yea..
, at 11 pm .]]